I think her Canadian keeper has really succeeded at making Rachel Bilson boring as fuck. It’s like he’s kidnapped her sex appeal and locked it up in his fucking igloo or someshit so that no other guy looks at her or tries to fuck her. He’s even gone so far as to dress her in some native influenced sweater that you may or may not have seen every dyke wear this winter and when lesbians wear the shit, you know it’s not really something that girls are wearing to give boners. Good job Darth Vader…what don’t you fucking ruin? I guess we can only hope he gets in a snowmobile accident, or that he drives into a fucking moose or something while she’s in LA working, so that he’ll officially back the fuck off.
Acting is funny. It’s like this is all made up. Bitch is sitting in a room talking to a woman and acting all hysterical. This is the kind of thing that gets you arrested if you do this kind of shit in the mall or at the drugstore or pretty much anywhere, but in Gabourey Sidibe’s defense, they showed her a bucket of chicken, two big macs and some chilli fries before this audition and said “read the fucking lines or you’ll never get to eat again” and hysterics, tears and bullshit ensued. Sure she’s an easy target…but don’t blame me for that…blame her pant size…if they even make pants in her size.
On a sidenote she got cast on a TV show, but unfortunately for her it wasn’t celebrity fit club….if she doesn’t do something she is gonna die…but then again I’ve been force feeding my wife for a decade hoping her obesity would make her die but all it’s done is made her more annoying, harder to deal with and more disgusting now that I have to wipe her ass 4 times a day.
On an influenced by the trash in Precious note…here’s an inspiring story about teenage lust and love…
I would rather not be spending my time writing about low level barely celebrities who will never actually be celebrities, especially when they are on the beach, mainly because I want to be on the fucking beach. I don’t want to be famous and I’m really not talented or capable of even being a low level reality star, since I’m only good at drinking, socially awkward and uncomfortable waking up and doing things, but I wouldn’t mind having a little bit of their money for being the useless fuck that I am, so that I could just do absolutely nothing but walk around in the sun and stare at my tits all day…that’s not to say I am jealous of Whitney Port and her shitty body or flat ass, it’s just to reaffirm that I’m a fucking loser who writes about people like Whitney Port who most people don’t even know and her shitty body and flat ass in a bikini, like she’s some more important than any of us, when really she’s a fucking nothing.
I guess that just makes me part of the fucking problem, but I’m in too deep now and too lazy to step it and do something substantial, but I just want you to know that I know there’s so much more to life that this trash the media already shoves down our throats, but I’ll just post the pics anyway….
The biggest mistake John Mayer could have made was telling the public that Jessica Simpson was sexual napalm in bed. Shit was Oprah and all over the media and brought over-night attention to Jessica Simpson. The dude from Hurt Locker wante to get into her Hurting “ovaries that wants to get their egg fertilized so that she will have a family and be as happy as her little sister who shouldn’t have had babies before her and the fact that she hasn’t been able to keep a man makes her feel like a bigger loser than she is, while giving her something new to love and care or even though she’s not very good at taking care of things proven in her dogs abduction and killed by coyotes because she is a bad mother and not good a lookin’ after things…Locker…and Ryan Philippe who will probably like these pictures since he has a history of fat bitches…
Either way, she’s boxy, she’s thick, I’d still love to suck her used tampons, but I have no standards and you’re in hollywood bitch, step up your fucking game and drop the texan BBQ.
I love the fabric of the dress Monster Kardashian is wearing. I’ve been seeing it a lot on girls in bars, on the street and pretty much everywhere and it’s some kind of fake leather-lookin’ shit that for some reason gives girls hard nipples.
I don’t know what it is about this fabric that makes nipples hard, but it must be magic or at least created by some kind of pervert…..because even Monster Kardashian, a creature who must have a huge set of testicles, the fabric still fuck makes the motherfucker’s nipples hard.
And since I love nipples, this post is more to encourage more girls to wear this kind of shirt, like actual girls and not ones who look like they belong in gay porn, and not to celebrate Khloe Kardashian…I just want to make that clear…because there is nothing worth celebrating when it comes to Khloe Kardashian…except maybe when the someone shoots her when she tries to attack them at their campground or some shit…in a mount that paw and turn it into an end table kind of way…
People seem to care so much about these earthquakes predicting the end of the world that hit Haiti and Chile, but they don’t seem to care so much about Michael J. Fox, even though everyday feels like an earthquake to him…so maybe we need a Tsunami warning, cuz even I know earthquakes in water cause Tsunamis….
Except maybe today, because here he is in picture of Michael J. Fox following his wife of 30 years on the beach living large, showing the paparazzi that he’s still got it, but showin’ off his magic fingers, thanks to Parkinsons making him a human vibrator, behind her back, letting us know he’s still got it, without her even knowing he’s showin’ off his pussy….
If anything, I’m pretty sure he called the paparazzi, to just show off, clear things up for his disease, cuz like all disabled people, the public starts treating you differently, and forget that you can get good pussy, even if it married you before you were disabled and feels trapped and like it has to stay with you to not look like an evil person, but like my friend in a wheel chair, Michael J. Fox is all about milking the pussy he gets and making it clear that not everyone suffering from the shit is 90 years old in a home, but can be in their 40s with pretty solid bodied 40 year old pussy he just needs to stand next to to make her cum. He’s like riding the fucking washing machine…
That said, part of me loves one-piece bathing suits, not because they remind me of little kids at swim class, but because sometimes they hide the stretch marks and unappealing shit a bikini doesn’t hide and I’ve got a serious love for anything that can touch pussy, tits and ass at the same time, even if it is just a piece of clothing.
I don’t like Amber Rose. I don’t find anything interesting about her and I hate the way she dresses like she’s some kind of robot from the future. I find it fucking annoying, but I do like tits, so I guess Kanye’s theory that no one will catch onto his homosexuality, or the fact that he just likes Amber Rose to shop with and talk about boys with, and not to titty fuck her or get her pregnant, as long as she shows off her tits and ass and keeps up her moderate sex appeal while staying moderately masculine with a shaved head to make his idiot fans jealous enough to ignore the truth while allowing him to keep up the lie by not throwing up when he rubs her hand in her hair because this way he can pretend she’s a dude when he closes his eyes to kiss her for the media….
People with money and success always do this keeping up appearances shit because rappers aren’t liked as much when they suck dick or get fucked up the ass by white men (because he’s racist) to get off and I blame it all on him being raised without a daddy…
Broken homes make for broken rectum thanks to all the white men he lets inside him behind closed doors, but in front of closed doors, it’s this tryin’ hard to be a “sex robot” to disract you from the wad of cum dripping off his chin…
I’ve spent the majority of the day mourning the death of Corey Haim. He was a real success in terms of showing the world how much Hollywood can rape your soul and lead you to serious addiction that leads you to blowing all your money and ending up in a one room apartment in Montreal rolling cigarettes out of butts you find, or convincing some of your new friends to buy you a slushie/slurpie because you haven’t eaten in 4 days, and byt mourning his death I mean negotiating with various people to get / trade nude pics of local girls, like bartenders and party girls from the neighborhood….it wasn’t a success…because despite knowing all girls are whores with nude pictures, I haven’t mastered the art of getting them to share those pics with me….I have no game but I do have stepLINKS and here they are….
Whitney Port’s in a Bikini – I Guess Her Useless Body Has Found a Purpose GO
Here are some pictures of Cheryl Cole playing a gay sailer on a gay cruise in some strategic see-through shirt that doubles as underwear for people on a budget who can only afford a shirt or a pair of panties but not both, but that makes seeing her trashy tits impossible.
Luckily, we can see her shitty prison tattoos and I really like the music note on the shit, it’s a nice touch, you know, almost making this performance believable, and the rose, my god the rose, is this chick serious..I couldn’t even write this shit in a stage performance I’ve been working on, where I channel a teenage runaway with a dream of being a singer who ends up a stripper 40 years after life wronged her, because a tattoo like this would just be too fucking obvious….
These pics coulda been better but they are good enough….
Seeing hard nipples on a middle-aged gold digging women who is out on her own making it for herself is a lot more fun in person. It’s part of the reason I started volunteering at the YMCA years ago before getting fired for a mishap in the lady’s locker room but the good news is – I’ll always have the park bench where all these career woman with insane bodies go jogging by….and I guess these pictures of some useless fame whore with a Moroccan name who isn’t Moroccan but her money is that I’ve never heard of…
I’ve always been down for a little Cameron Diaz peeping. Sure she’s not the typical dirtbag whore I am actually into exchanging fluids with for very little money, but there’s just something about her that I think is amazing and it’s not that she comes across as the girl who would take a picture of her shit to show you in excitement, or the fact that she probably watches sports and farts, it’s got more to do with tall, long celebrity legs, so when I first saw these pictures I thought she was in some dominatrix shit, but then I realized she wasn’t, and now I am bored, so it’s time to move on.
I may hate Megan Fox and her constant bullshit trying to stay in the limelight for as long as possible because she knows she’s replaceable, and nothing but the next Jessica Alba, you know the girl everyone wants to fuck, who never shows her fucking tits or pussy, because it makes guys want her harder and because she pretends she’s wholesome, even though she’s really nothing but a loser with shitty tattoos, a shitty boyfriend, who seems pretty shitty to hang around, but who takes every opportunity to be sexually suggestive as possible….but I definitely like her ass.
Here it is in Harper’s Bazaar….and it turns out it isn’t Megan Fox but some other model…and really what difference does it make…
Coco is ridiculous stripper ass who must have some serious dirt on Ice-T, like shit that can ruin his career, or maybe get him arrested or killed, because that’s the only reason I can assume he took her off the stripper pole and after work escorting and married her, marketed her….or maybe he is just a pervert who didn’t want to share his whore with other people, he wanted her all for himself. but like any dude who likes showing off his shit, in a way to say he’s really made it and he’s better than us, even though I find Coco fucking vile and disgusting, he makes her show off for her low level fans, because let’s face it she’s pretty fucking useless in the grand scheme of things….and here is a naked pic of her on her tanning bed that she posted on twitter… classy girls from the gutter who were probably molested or abused, like I like ‘em.
I just heard this Howard Stern vs Precious rant and found it pretty accurate. She looks like a cartoon character and when Oprah said she is going to be around for a long lasting career, I laughed because I knew she was going to die in the next 5 years if she doesn’t get her shit together. It really just proves that anyone can be an actor and sure she played a fat, black, retarded chick but how many more fat, black, retarded chicks are there out there…The pretty much had to nominate her for an Academy Award out of sympathy for her like some make a wish foundation shit…and if she won it would have been the biggest joke on Hollywood, whether she deserved it or not, there’s just no one they could embrace giving someone with no skill at acting the best acting award against all these bitches who have been doing this for decades and think it’s a legitimate art form…and now hollywood has just inflated another ego, only to take it away, for them to turn to drugs and alcohol to self-medicate before Corey Haiming themselves….RIP Precious….
Anyway, there’s nothing hot about Precious, her heart disease or body like my wife, who has spent half a century with an eating disorder and emotional distress getting to her size, but there is something hot about Oprah on a Lesbian Date with Gale….so here are some pictures of Oprah showing off her big fat ass I want to cum inside….but not because I find Oprah hot, but because Oprah is fucking God….
Here are some pictures of Katie Price scratching her ass because when you’re a dirty little whore you get itchy in your fuckholes…sometimes it’s a yeast infection, other times it’s not a proper wipe, sometimes its even just irritation from shaving, waxing, bleaching her anus, but most of the time it’s just poor fucking hygiene and wart she can tribute to being a dirty little whore who made her career being a dirty little whore…not that that’s a surprise to any of you, since we all know you gotta suck dick to afford her lavish lifestyle, and the dick it seems like she’s gonna be getting surgically applied so that she can really be a tranny, instead of just looking like one…
