I am slow on this shit because I haven’t been reading my emails the last week, I’m on strike, but he’s the most anticipated dude in hip hop and I find the whole thing kinda funny because he is a half-jewish Canadian who was on some TV show and there’s nothing hood about that, but who needs fuckin’ hood when you get all the bitches, and here they are with their tits.

Happy fourth of July you cocksuckers.

Be sure to take your fat ass outside in your bathing suit and get your meat on your fuckin’ grill, because that’s what Kim Kardashian wants you to do. She wants tyou to not feel insecure about your fat ass or sloppy stomach from being a lazy piece of shit with a workout DVD and she just wants you to enjoy all the food you’ll soon be eating…. I am going thru alochol withdrawal and it hurts me both physically and emotionally so try to walk it out with me…unless you’re too lazy to walk…in which case just wait for me to come back…..eventually…

I am still a fan of Rihanna, not because I put on her music and I can’t help but ask myself to politely not stop it, because it speaks to me. It’s not because I think she’s talented, or because I think she offers the world pretty much anything, it’s not because I find her the hottest girl in the world, but I am a fan because she knows how to get beat the fuck up by her man like a good girl.

Here she is showing off some cleavage…I just fell asleep typing. That is the weirdest feeling to date. Thanks drinking..

I assume the only Americans who are reading this are lonely and friendless virgins with little to do, because it’s the fourth of July weekend and even the cunts on The View took the week off to spend at the cottage with the fuckin’ family, or wherever the fuck you people go on your time off, but I expect it to be a place where computers aren’t the priority, because computers are the fuckin’ devil and you spend enough time on the shit during the week, so while you American are out eating corndogs, watching baseball, beating up gays and blacks and being proud of being fat trailer trash, I’m gonna post this hot little UK popstar for my Europeans who can appreciate a hot set of tits on a vagina that’s locked onto one of their pro athletes….Her name is Cheryl Cole and she’s pretty luxurious..

I am not successful and I don’t know anything about business or marketing, but when you are selling a low level product, let’s say a spray tan in a can like you were Lindsay Lohan, you’re probably better off getting your professional birthday spray tan in the privacy of your own “Samantha Ronson” home, so that the world doesn’t see you leaving a spray tan salon, pretty much telling us that your product isn’t good enough for you and that even you don’t bother with it and just attached your name to it for a quick fuckin’ buck, cuz that kind of hypocrisy and money grubbin sell out scamming behavior pisses me off and if you didn’t have such nice breasts, I’d probably write you a heavy worded email regarding this important personal business matter.

Here are the pics and I think it’s still her birthday, so Happy Birthday, asshole

You know what happens when nobody loves you, when no one wants to give you the time of day, when nobody wants to work or talk to you because you are a worthless nobody, when even your family doesn’t answer your calls because on your rise to fame you alienated everyone you knew like a little cunt, cuz you were thinking that it was only up from there and that your peak was actually just the beginning, and that you’d never fade into obscurity like some useless trend, like Hypercolor T-shirts or some shit, you get a dog, because as long as you feed the fuckin’ thing, it’ll act like it likes you, and sometimes it feels good to take of something that depends on you, when everyone else around you just expects you to fail, not to mention all it takes to get oral sex is a food on genitals, and I’m sure you know that trick doesn’t work with real chicks.

Either way, you can kinda see up her skirt as she shows off her legs and gets busy with some random dog like the whore that she is.

Katie Price and her Pineapple shirt are so not the kind of people you’d expect to see in Ed Hardy. You know cheesy as fuck bottle service guidos with retarded fake tits, fake hair, fake everything, tons of make-up, a vagina that has seen many fuckin’ dick like some kind of glorified stripper or whore that all the other strippers or whores look up to in envy, because she’s made it into the mainstream world and is set for life is not Ed Hardy’s market. Ed Hardy is not meant for the cheesy assholes in the clubs tryin’ to look like they have money, it is a premium brand and premium price points that are for premium people with old money, who like classic styles and not offensively loud shit to draw attention to how much they spent on a fuckin’ t-shirt because they have something to prove and see it as status.

I don’t know if that made sense, but if it didn’t, I blame Katie Price’s flat non existant ass, we get that she fucked with nature and jacked her tits up, but lookin at an ass like that on a body that has tits like hers, is so against nature, that it’s on some tranny-level of unnatural shit.

Here are the pics…

I hate the fact that everytime someone loses their shit and strip naked, whether it is a homeless person, a drunk or high person, or someone totally mentally unstable they always have a fuckin’ dick. It was a dude who I once say naked on a pool table with a pool cue in his ass, it was a dude I saw on the side of the street high on MDMA jerking his dick, it was a dude who I say passed out naked on a park bench covered in what looked like chocolate syrup, and it is NEVER fuckin’ girls. No matter how insane a bitch is, no matter how fucked up and high she is, I have never seen a girl voluntarily throw off her clothes, it’s always taken negotiations on my part to get a little pussy flash, and I’d love if just once, while sitting on a bus, on a fuckin’ plane, on a fuckin’ train or even in a fuckin’ horsedrawn carriage, a chick would start stripping and screaming and running back and fuckin’ forth, pussy and tits out in the motherfuckin open like this dude who did it on some United Airways flight….who got restrained by two off duty cops, who I hear thought this was the high point of their careers….who later got arrested, but Ladies, do not let that stop you!!! Please.

I am still recovering cuz I am a pussy, speaking off pussy, send me pictures of yours to win a chance to be eaten out by me. It’s not really a prize for you, but it is to me.

Here are my stepLINKS

I like rap videos when they get girls in their lingerie and shake their asses, even if their asses aren’t prime fuckin’ quality, I mean what would you expect from a bunch of guys no one has ever heard of with limited budget for whores. I’m not picky, I spend most of my time in bootleg stripclubs, you know the ones struggling to stay alive, that offer cheap drinks and cheap women, so I’m down with this shit.

This girl’s face may be a little bullshit and I’m not just saying that becuase there’s some brown motherfuckin shit all up on it, I am saying that because she’s got the kind of nose that makes you think you’re jerking off to a caricature you bought on the boardwalk, but whatever the fuck is goin on with her body is pretty fuckin’ alright by me.

Her name is Maria, she’s trying to remind us of some new age West Side Story, when really all she is is the dude from CSI’s drug connect frontin as his love interest, because it makes things less suspect. I’m onto you, when really I’d just want to be cumming on you. Word.

Here are some pictures of Anne Hathaway on her downtime lookin like she’s fuckin’ homeless and the only thing hot about that is trying to imagine if she’s allowed the rest of her to fade as much as her hair and face, because if she has, that pussy probably smells like some kind of wonderful, if some kind of wonderful to you is the smell of roadkill.

I once went to Shakepeare in the park and got escorted out by security even though it was a free show, I think it had something to do with me masturbating over my pants…

There was a time when Elizabeth Berkley was the hottest shit, you know a little Saved by the Bell Saturday morning jerk off session. There was a time she was getting naked and givin lap dances in movies and now she’s just menopausal. I guess that is the circle of life or someshit, but I’m no philosopher so I could be wrong.

Jayde Nicole is from Canada, she’s also a fake titty whore who was Playmate of the year at one point in her career, making her really live up to the cheesy Ed Hardy wearing 9 to 5 millionaire her poor ass wanted to be, back when she lived with her single mother who worked at a diner, suckin’ dick on the side to get by, only to turn around and teach her daughter what is really important in life by encouraging her to be a high class escort because the perks that come with that mean a good life, and really these poor wallet fuckers are proud of where they are right now.

I’ve seen her in person once or twice and she looks like a little worthless slag and I am sure if she was in a bar next to you, you’d only look twice because of the cleavage, she’s one of those thinks she’s better lookin than she is kinda girl, which always gets in the way of me getting them masturbating on video because they think they are too good for me, but they aren’t too good for Playboy, that shit’s like the Holy Grail to them. Word.

After last night, I am not only surprised that I am alive, but I am also surprised that it isn’t the weekend yet and that I have to fuckin’ post on the site, probably the last thing I want to do, but the only thing I got goin for me, which makes it all more depressing for me.

Here are some pictures of Hayden that look like she’s taking a shit, because you know to get a ripped body like hers she’s eating all kinds of protein 8 times a day probably leading to many shits a day, the kind that throw you off your feet and make you wonder how such a horrible smell came out of such a small body, because I feel like shit.