I was a victim of the Jessica Simpson media frenzy during Dukes of Hazard, where bitch was parading around in her bikini. I am not going to lie, her big titties and flas stomach hypnotized me into thinking the bitch was hot. Since bitch has got her divorce, she disgusts me. It all happened around the time of the divorce. I think a young married woman who has been with one dude and is off limits to all other dudes is kinda sexy. But once a divorcee you know there’s really no going back. You know she’s got baggage coming out of her fucking ass and that she sits in her hotel room and cries and if she’s not crying she’s eating and if she’s not eating she’s fucking random men who wanted a piece when she was married but couldn’t get any because she’s a good little bible thumping, jesus fucking, cunt. That said, she’s carrying herself like she’s got the weight of the world on her shoulders and she doesn’t seem to have any problem with it, cuz bitch is so muscular and built like a dude that she could take another plate. That was a gym reference for those of you who are fat and lazy like me. Now fuck off, I am going to go finger my ass while thinking about arm wrestling this slag. Cuddles Motherfucker.

Bonus: Some Pics of Bitch Rockin’ Out

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