The people at JULIESROOM.NET sent me some fan signs. I’d jerk off to their amateur porn video collection if I could get it up…but I cant’ but you can so do the fucking math on that one pervert.

This is Tera Patricks’ costume from some party she hosted. I don’t really understand why she’s wearing anything, considering the fact that we have all seen her naked and getting fucked. She’s a dirty whore who has seen more dick that you have, and you’re a closet case faggot with a gay porn addiction. Either way…these are her pics….

Speaking of herpes, I am watching Dr Phil, because it’s what I do at 5 pm on weekdays. It’s all part of being unemployed. They are talking about how a woman with a Femmullet landed herpes from her cheating husband. That makes me laugh, not because I think herpes is funny or because I think innocent people deserve herpes and I really hate the fact that banging bitches can result in death, or painful cock sores, or burning when it pees, but the fact that these 2 white trash bitches are pulling a Jerry Springer on this show and the fact that the world knows she’s got vagina issues is funny in an embarrassing way, like when you shit your pants when you think you’ve got to fart. I generally hate bathroom jokes but I am trying to figure out a reason why I am laughing without admitting that I am a fucking asshole and love other people’s pain.

Speaking of Assholes, Here’s a message one of my readers wrote KELS. If you don’t know who KELS is, read my previous post.

here’s my message to your friend KELS,

Hey! Saw your profile and thought I’d drop in and say HI! HI HI HI!!

I saw you had said you have a dirty secret on your, “About Me” section…I’m not going to lie…I have one too! I’ll share with you! I was jerking off to your fat ass picutres in your fat ass “pics” section and some of my cum landed on the “K” key on my keyboard!!! I thought it was funny though becuase your name starts with a K too!!! Gosh, I should buy a lottery ticket today!

I know that sounds kinda gross Kels, but seriously, I just can’t help myself when I’m looking at 5’2″ fat girls on myspace with teeth that look like they’re trying to run away from your face and with what I can only guess are dinner plate sized nipples. Don’t get me wrong Kels, I love dinner plates…if it weren’t for them I would have to eat my food on the floor with the homeless! Silly homeless people.

Aaaanyways. Just wanted to say I love you and that you made my day better. We should totally get together sometime and listen to music! Looks like you like your music almost as you like your cake!

love,

puddin

Hayden Panettiere was the next girl on my To Stalk List. I came across these topless pics and felt like I should post them. I am not into blood and guts but it is halloween. I am also not the one who came up with this joke, some dude emailed it to me today and it made me giggle like a school girl who just got an A for sucking my english teacher off….Either way, I can accept that there are a lot of useless people in the world. Some of those useless people happen to be you. I will not be stalking Panettiere, she’s boring, but I will be making someone famous in this post…..

I was going through my comments and this is what I came across.

this site is absolutel smutty trash. why dont u guys actually do some real stories? u guys clearly suck at this. and to the racist bastard, why dont u go to another site just like i’m about to do….duh

So I sent her this email

I noticed that you commented on my site. I was interested in finding out more about you. Such as what you are wearing, how many times you have given a blowjob and how much cock you’ve had inside your dirty stinky asshole. I am down with anal, unfortunately I cannot get it up. I used to be an alcoholic and have since developed and prostate problem. The doc says it’s the size of a baseball…..I’d love to let you massage it.

In conclusion, thanks for visiting the site and I am happy to know that we are in love.

Keep up the indie music cat…

With Love

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

And she responded:

u really are pathetic arent u? to actually single 1 person out by sending her an email. lol. ur hilarious. so far ur site sux and i regret going to it and doubt that i will ever visit it again. so u wont have to worry about my comments any more…

oh and to answer ur questions: i’m wearing a mini skirt and a long sleeve white top. I only give it up to my bf and that is our little secret.I guess u’ll be spending more lonely nights photoshopping boobs, nipples, and chochas onto celebs. lol. Oh and i thought my email was supposed to be private….see this is why ur site sux, u dont deliver what u say u will deliver. and u should step outside of ur online character/personality because it doesnt do anything for u. show something that is worth viewing or looking at on ur site, perhaps more viewers will check it out and i could possibly return to the site as well. good luck with ur filth.

My Last Email….

My site may suck, but I just made you famous, Bitch

And I visited her myspace only to find out that KELS is Black, and KELS takes pics of herself in her bra to show off her FAT tits, and that KELS has fat tits, because she’s been eating too much KFC and KELS doesn’t eat too much KFC because she’s black, KELS just can’t get enough of what fried fucking chicken has done for her physique, so KELS decides to make a myspace profile and KELS decides to beg for the attention daddy never gave her because he was in jail by taking naughty pics and getting perverted boys to message her asking for more….with less clothes and KELS decides to rip into my site by using her real email and calling it SMUT, and KELS real email leads me to her myspace only to find out the smut that is being published online is not only coming for me but it’s also coming from KEL and I can’t help buy pat myself on the back because this shit couldn’t have worked out any fucking better. I am not a racist, but I am still going to get shot.

Visit her myspace GO , and send her sexual harrassing messages….

Look how clever Jennifer Love is…she knows that it’s halloween and that it’s a time to dress like a whore and here she is rocking a Charlie Chaplin suit. Something about as attractive as jerking off to pictures of your great grandfather outside the saloon during the gold rush. To make things worse, she’s walking around with a notepad, because I can only assume she’s dressed like the “Silent Film”. Something about as obnoxious/pretentious as people who make you pronounce thier names different than they are spelled, or the people at the front of your class challenging the teacher by asking stupid questions, but using big words to overcompensate. I guess the fact that she’s with Justin Timberlake is also annoying, because that means motherfucker is keepin’ her titties all for himself. I hate bitches who don’t show off their tits when we all know they have tits because what it comes down to is that Justin Timberlake looking motherfuckers shouldn’t be the only one to bask in the sunshine that is her cleavage….while writing stupid shit on notepads at halloween events because he’s so fucking ironic….suck my dick whore.

Speaking of whores, here’s an email that I’ve decided is worthy of being the EMAIL of the day….

This is what I’m talking about. I love a good fingering, I hope you use 2 and I hope you know what you’re doing. If you did all that, you’d notice right away that I’m wet all over right off the bat. It doesn’t take me long to warm up to you and licks from behind really fucking turn me on. I would get off, Jesus. Likely, my ass would start quivering and I’d be moanin’ low. I like to grab my tits when I get off, because the nipples get all hard and I feel all sexy like that. I’d be hoping you slip it in while I was a quivery and drippy and begging for it with my body that way I could keep coming over and over and over…

How do you like it best? Because I try it all the ways…I’d do anything you wanted (almost). I aim to please you Jesus, you could pose me around like a doll, and I’d like it. If you didn’t want to take charge like that, I might be a little bashful at first, I’m not going to lie, I am not typically the agressor in bed, but I don’t mind after awhile, and I’d end up on top of you because I know how to wiggle my hips to give myself these incredible orgasms and plus I look super sexy doing it with my hair all down near my tits and my head back, on display

Too bad I am impotent….

I am shaking in the corner like a rape victim in an alley in the rain, but that has nothing to do with these stepLINKS, that’s just my intro. I am back with the stepLINKS cuz that’s really what this site is known for so you better get clicking cuz I’m back. If you haven’t already told your friends about this site, you better get crackin because my success highly depends on you cunts. I am actually not too impressed that none of you have commented today. There’s something rewarding in getting comments, even when they are racist and retarded…. I plan on getting drunk tonight because drunk makes me happy and you don’t…..speaking of unhappy – here are some sad links for the day….

These bitches are more duffgusting than the dude from a Trailer Park in Alabama raping his own mother. I guess she looked good in her bathrobe while making him pancakes for breakfast all those years. Bitch must have been asking for it bending over to do the dusting. I guess that no pussy is as good as the first pussy you ever touched and I realize that I am an asshole with no compassion because I can only laugh at how fucked up the world is and I feel like since she raised him, I’d rather he rape her than rape one of my stepdaughters or your sister or the innocent girl that lives in the trailer down the lane, who is already dealing with daddy’s alcoholism…I guess the really issue is whether either of them gave the other one an STD like when this dude’s having a herpes outbreak in jail and his boyfriend asks him where he scored that shit and he’s all like “so I was raping my mom and bitch was a dirty whore, you never think of your mom as a bitch with herpes, I sure learnt my lesson….” and I guess when he gets out of jail – Christmas Dinner will be really fucking awkward….All this to say the Duff sisters don’t have to worry about getting raped by anyone….

This bitch is 21 and has starred in such amazing movies like American Pie Bandcamp back in 2005. I guess that would explain why bitch is on a fucking budget and is buying her useless attempt at being a whore costume at Wal Mart. I went out on Saturday night looking for bitches dressed like sluts, I ended up at some bar and the hottest girl in the place wasn’t even wearing a costume, she was wearing regular clothes, but her dress was barely covering her ass. I fell in love and if I wasn’t as creepy as I am, I am sure I coulda convinced her to show me what she was rocking under that said barely there dress. She was walking around with some fat dude with long hair, it’s always typical of hot bitches to end up with losers. Maybe dude’s in a band or something. Either way, Halloween is tomorrow, I have one more chance to get out there with my camera and if I am not feeling agoraphobic, lazy, depressed and angry – I will definitely get some stepTV content. It’s been too long….

I used to have an unhealthy obsession with American Apparel leotards. This is before I hated every Jewish bitch and her Yoga obsessed mother turned hipster. I still think that there is something really fucking sexy about a bitch rocking a piece of clothing that touches her tits and her box all at the same time. The only leotard story I have is about a girl who used to go to American Apparel and try on leotards for me, I met her at Starbucks a year ago and she knew I loved them. One day, she was heading out to a Pants Off party and decided to swing by the one bedroom apartment I call home, my wife was out at Bingo and the stepdaughters were out being sluts somewhere. Anyway, she turned on some music and decided to do a little dance while rocking her American Apparel one piece leotard. I am pretty sure it was the same one Lohan has on in these pics. I didn’t get hard cuz I don’t know how to get hard, it’s got something to do with my life of hard living and a huge prostate but I did have the chance to slide her leotard to the side and play with her lady parts until she realized that she had a 35 year old fat man in sweatpants playin with her goods. This was about a year ago and the novelty of the leotard hasn’t fully worn off, but Lohan is a fucking loser and is more of a trend follower than a trendsetter in these pics. I am sure 60% of all halloween costumes bought this year were from AA. Either way, nice gloves you fucking whore…..

BONUS – Lohan Leaving Another Party in Silk Pajamas Covering Up Her Dominatrix Costume, nice gloves you fucking whore….

I am pretty sure these pics are old, but I have a really bad memory so that means that they are new to me. I lost my picture hook up a couple of weeks ago and I’ve been away from the computer for awhile so I just don’t know what’s up. Come to think of it, I am pretty sure that I never really knew what’s up, I don’t read other sites, watch TV or leave my house. My stepdaughter always tells me stories about things she sees on TV, whether it’s facts about Nicole Richie or funny things the Princes of Malibu do. Yesterday it was about Borat calling Madonna a transgendered person, even though he’s in her DJ music video, I wasn’t too impressed, cuz that’s like saying “Feed Nicole” or talking about Paris Hilton’s sex tape. It’s been done. Either way, I get fucking annoyed knowing that she’s filling her brain up with celebrity smut, when she could be training to be a stripper, something that could actually put some food on our table.

This post has been shitty, I am just waking up, it’s 11:56 and I have 4 minutes left of The View. There’s something about watching Rosy that makes me feel good about myself. Maybe cuz she’s a fucking lesbian.

I am not sure if this is a Spice Girl or not. I came across these pics and they were labeled Melanie B. The only brown Melanie B I know is the Spice Girl, but I am not really the expert here. I always get dissed for being wrong, like the time I said a girl in a bathing suit was Kate Beckinsale or some shit, when really it was some overweight teenager from Nebraska. It doesn’t matter who these pictures are of, the point is that the bitch is wearing a see through shirt and showing off a little nipple. I know that you aren’t used to seeing nipple other than your own and that this shit may be a little too much to handle for a virgin but my solution for you is to sign up to this new social networking site one of my readers started up, build a profile and wreck shit up. I am uploading pics of slutty Halloween Costumes and a shitty article I wrote on having free sex with hookers as I type this cuz it’s that time of year…

The site’s called trendmill, it’s invite only and I’ve got an invite for you to join my entoruage and read my shit GO

I remember a time when I got an insane amount of fan mail. People would constantly send in pictures of themselves and stories of shit they’ve done and it was always a good time. In the last 72 hours…I have received 4 emails, one that was legit and the other 4 were spam. At first I thought it was my mail server fucking up. I was all like how could this shit not be coming in, but them I realized tha the fuck up in all this is me. I’ve lost my appeal, people are bored and the last 2 weeks of death leave has forced people to find other stomping grounds. I do feel rejected and like this is an end of an era and I would have shed a tear if I honestly believed this site deserved being called an era. Either way, stepSTEVE told me that he learned how to play the Bass this summer and now is in a band that is recording an album with a producer from Warner. I’d like to wish him the best of luck and to remember his humble beginnings when he reaches the top. I am always surprised by right place at the right time situations….I always seem to be at the wrong place at the right time. Speaking of wrong place, Avril’s box is in the wrong place, if it was a little too the left, these pics would be worth posting. Assholes.

Do you remember Traci Bingham? She was a baywatch slut but no one noticed her because she made the beach look like a giant kitty litter while Pam Anderson was showing off her hard nipples. I was like am I watching Baywatch or is this the shit in the sand hour on the Discovery channel. I don’t know what I am talking about but at least she’s got solid cleavage, cleavage that her whole career is based on, the best $5k investment of her life. Speaking of cleavage, some girl from myspace sent in a DJ AM story, DJ AM once had cleavage but then he got gastric bypass surgery. Cuddles.

so you probaly dont care but you seem to have a distaste for nichole richie so im gonna tell you my story….her stupid ex-fiance dj am stoopid adam golstien who even refers to himself of late as a.m. yelled at me for taking a xanax last night…at his friends show mickey avalon who happens to “rap” about herion pills coke and hookers…not to mention i have seen him stand by while she blew lines…they both suck!!!

Some tranny looking woman sent me this myspace message:

Make me famous because I can deliver messages thru comedy and Kisses to the masses. I own the trade mark for rating anything. No thumbs up. No 5 stars. Everyone does that. No 5 hard on’s, limp to hard Hustsler Mag. No Zagat. No Foders…Yup me. Tina O.
1 out of 5 Kisses or I KISS IT OFF…. later got to get some zzzzz’s.
We can both see if this works. I related to your poster and I am doing well. Now I am going to be great!!!

read my sight I have been on 4…………….. 2 days

Kisses
All 5 of them
Tina O

I didn’t really understand what she was getting at, so I did what every guy with something a woman wants does, and that means I asked her to send me nude pics of her tranny-self. Instead I got this message which was probably a good thing, considering she has testicles.

I trade marked the first female rating system. IOWN IT. 1 out of 5 Kisses or I KISS IT OFF.

I am in the process of getting a TV show out calld “KISS THIS” 2007

comedic half hour show about a movie critc and her daily life and trying to give reviews,and I juxtapose movie clips, and crazy charectures (up and coming comics) like Seinfeld did as he played a comic….
mine is a little wackeir than his show….anyway ….thats a small pease of it and you can read my reviews on my blog

KISSES
all 5 of them

Now the thing that pisses me off in all this is that I know this girl is going to be famous before I ever will. She spells worse than me and her claim to fame is a rating system based on kisses. If you’re bored, sexually harass her by visting her myspace GO . Try to convince her to kiss you off until you bust in her face or at least all over your belly, cuz I know you like trannies. HOMO.

Speaking of trannies, here are some pics of Carmen Electra at some event in different outfits which leads me to believe that these are pics of 2 different girls but I never have an eye for that kind of shit…..

MUNG has a story for us and it isn’t that bad. I don’t always like what these fucker has to say, but whenever he does the family stories I get a kick out of it. I don’t think called Alabama Blue Gums/Black People the N-Bomb is always the smartest thing to do on a website that I am trying to make money with, but I guess I have to suck it up and realize that this shit is a lost cause. Speaking of lost cause…here’s MUNG. Cuddles.

There is a movie coming out called “Blood Diamond” starring Leo DiCaprio. The movie was filmed in South Africa and is about the diamond trade or some political bullshit like that. Warner Bros. is responsible for filming this movie and it will probably suck because it is about black people and how they are so hard done by. I read on the internet today that Warner Bros. took amputee niglets from South Africa and told them that if they were extras in the movie that they would provide them with prosthetic limbs. Well guess what…they haven’t given the little nigger amputees anything, because Warner Bros. is a jew company that is run by jews.

I remember when my brother and I put up the Christmas Tree in August and told my cousin with downs syndrome that Santa was coming the next day. The little retard got so excited he pissed and shit himself because he thought it was Christmas. The next morning he woke up in his pajamas that smelled like urine and feces and ran to the Christmas tree to see that there were no presents and that Santa hadn’t eaten his cookies and milk the retard had left him. My brother and I laughed and laughed that day while my retarded cousin cried. Now I think back to that day and realize that it really wasn’t that funny. It could have been worse though…me and my brother could have promised little nigger amputees prosthetic limbs to star in our Hollywood movie.

That story is true by the way and I am going to hell,

MUNG

Thanks MUNG – Now here are some pics of Tori Spelling Pregnant, because who knows, maybe she’s growing a Downs Syndrome baby and you all know I am down with syndrome….and by syndrome I mean REALLY REALLY Old pictures. I’m talking 2 weeks old and in the celeb blog world that’s a long fucking time. Assholes.

There was a retarded kid in the high school I went to. He wasn’t 100 percent retarded, because he got by, but he was definitely semi-retarded. The dude had a tongue the size of a baseball and every time he tried to talk the fucking thing would be all hanging out and dripping and motherfucker sounded like he had a pair of socks shoved down his semi-retarded throat. I got to talking to an old high school friend of mine the other day and she told me she ran into him. I asked if she lived out her high school fantasy of sitting on his face and testing out that fucking tongue, because it was like the tongue of tongues and there’s no way bitch never thought about his semi-retarded face between her things, coming up for air and saying how much fun he likes to have in his wet, mess, big tongued muffled voice.

To me it’d be like running into one of the girls who had big tits and not trying to touch them. My old friend wasn’t impressed and asked me why I had to always be a sexual deviant like that…reality is… I really don’t know why the first thing I think of when I see a retarded kid with a fat tongue and a speech impediment is how good he could rock a girl. But I am convinced that if I am thinking it, so are they. I know they all secretly dream about him talking his retarded sloppy way on their boxes. I guess they just don’t like me calling them out on their weird fucking fantasies. Perverts.

Speaking of retarded, here are some pics of Janet Jackson’s retarded tits. These pics are old, but I guess that’s how I do things, cuz I hate celebrity, except my own. I love my own celebrity.