I am – Little Spears, Little Lohan and Some Other Slag in Training of the Day
Hayden Panettiere, Ali Lohan and Jamie Lynn Spears are underage celebrities with uncertain futures….Where are they going to end up when they reach the legal age to work. The debate is whether they are going to end up becoming drug addicted party sluts with too much money to spend, or do these girls go onto be the next big thing, and by big I don’t really mean like Brooke Shields with her penis-shaped vagina and football shoulders, but I do mean a childstar who makes it or do they end up being a washed up and dried out meth addicted stripper, unable to pay for their next hit so they suck dick in the back of a strip club kinda thing, I’m talking Family Matters Foxworthy bitch, and not the Foxworthy with the redneck jokes, but without the camera.
Speaking of strippers, I decided to give stripper’s advice as to how they can make more money…this is the first installment:
Me:
I can teach you how to make a lot of money all you have to do to get a lap dance is say, “i want you to grab my tits right now”
Stripper:
I’m the good girl in this club and I already making good money and guys with a lot of money don’t just want to grap your ass and tits. They want you to give them attention and affection they don’t get from their wife
Me:
You want me and it’s so obvious, i can tell by the attention and affection you give me that my wife doesn’t. How much do I owe you?
Stripper:
For you Mr. Martinez…I dance for free. Cuddles.
She dropped my fucking line… let’s face it…getting free lap dances is better than being famous.
Speaking of better than being famous here’s my one line argument for each of these players…
Ali….
She’s Lohan’s sister so even if she never makes a penny, she’s set for life, which means she won’t be sucking dick in the back alley. From my experience the younger sisters never follow the older drug addicted sister’s path, but Ali is her sister’s shadow and her Lindsay is her mother’s shadow, so it’s a family thing. She’ll be cutting lines and rocking VIP rooms and cocaine hotel afterparties by her 18th birthday….
Jamie Lynn….
Her name is Jaimie fucking Lynn, she was born to be a back alley cock-queen. A trashy southern family can only have so much luck before falling into their destined path of trailer’s and trash. She’s a little chubs and that will lead to the meth….She’ll never be as successful as her sister and that will lead to more meth….The only comfort is that her sister will be right by her side.
Hayden….
She’s already got the poses down that would lead one to believe she could suck dick in the bathroom for meth. She’s already been caught smoking and partying when she was 15 which would lead one to believe that she could end up spending her earnings in the club pocket full of bub kinda thing….she doesn’t have the older successful sibling, so she doesn’t have the insecurity with being the loser sister that leads to drug addiction and the comfort of the sister’s bank account that allows you to freeridethrough life so it can go any which way for her…
