Here are some pictures of Paris Hilton at Pure in Las Vegas last night practicing for tonight because it’s New Years Eve motherfucker, and she’s getting paid 1,000,000 dollars or some stupid amount of money to host a party with her sister according to some gossip magazine I read in line at the pharmacy because I thought the woman next to me would find it sexy.

So while Paris is out getting paid to rock out like all New Year’s Eves, you are planning on staying home with your mother watching the Dick Clark countdown on TV, because he hasn’t got so many more countdowns in him, while sipping on sparkling apple juice or whatever the fuck that non-alcoholic shit that comes in Champagne bottles is before going to bed to pull a wack to bring in the new year with a self-enduced orgasm all over your useless belly.

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