So Lohan doesn’t know this site exists but she’s been my Valentine for the last 3 years I have been doing this shit. I decided a long time ago that I needed to focus on one celebrity back then and I went with Lohan. I ended up scoring her phone number and left her a lot of creepy messages on her answering machine in hopes of her filing a restraining order or to even get me arrested. I figured it would have been good publicity and since she’s so loose in the hips, I probably would have ended up marrying her. She never called me back so I’d like to say something like “it’s her loss” like I am better than she is and like she’s missing out or something that makes my low self esteem feel better about myself, but I figure that the reality is that we are both missing out because a love this strong shouldn’t be ignored…and by love I mean I want to get her pregnant and live on her couch because it would make for a better life.

Either way, she brought her tits out for you all to enjoy and this is where the jealousy comes in and I gotta say stop lookin’ at my girl like that motherfucker. It’s making me mad. Cuddles.

PS – I can’t link to my stalker posts because my site is broken….but if you’re crafty enough you will use the search box to find it….

This entry was posted on Thursday, February 14th, 2008 at 2:24 pm and is filed under cleavage, Lindsay Lohan, Soulmate, Tits. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.