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Katie Holmes May Be Pregnant of the Day

People are saying that Katie Holmes is pregnant. I am saying that shit is impossible because Tom Cruise is gay. I know people who know people who know people who have told me on 2 different occasions from 2 different sources that he used to fly into Montreal on a private jet to fuck young french dudes. I know that the story could be a lie, but if you want to fuck young French dudes this is the place that everyday feels like I’ve accidentally walked into the gay pride parade. I guess he could always use artificial insemination after they suck the cum out of Travolta’s ass….I guess poopy sperm still packs a punch….

Speaking of punch, the last time I asked a girl when her baby was due, I got punched by her boyfriend. She was eating a box of donuts and was pushing 250 lbs. How was I to know she was just a fat fucking pig.

My theory is that she’s just on her period.

  • BB

    That’s a sandwich and a bag of pretzels.

  • Vize

    Its not Toms baby!!!!!!!!!!! Aliens came down and were going to pick up thier leader Tom. But Gwark the captain of the mother ship fell in love with Katie and BAMMO! Affair with an alien!

    This is True Scientology!

    When the mother ship doesnt land ……im here for you Katie

  • John

    She is not preggers, just fat. Yep, all fat under there!!

  • shay

    mind your own business ,Tom Cruise, not gay you are

  • peter

    tom likes clean shaven balls….i know.. he fucked me.

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  • Cerecedes

    ? very good thanks

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