I think it’s great that Fergie was able to pull her vagina out of the gutter, get off drugs, get out of debt and now have the money to buy anything she wants but doesn’t have to buy because companies are throwing the shit at her for free. It’s always been one of life’s weird dynamics, where companies want celebrities to promote their brands so they give them tons of product even though they can afford the shit while poor people they are marketing their shit too have to work their asses off for a month just to be able to afford a pair of fuckin’ sneakers they want. I guess it doesn’t matter, but is part of the reason why I’ve decided to make myself famous.

The bad news for Fergie is that despite her rise to the top, she forgot her face in the gutter and looks about 15 years older than she is. She’s like one of those kids I saw on Maury who had that disease where they age at hyperspeed and die of old age by the time they are 5. Her fake fiance will be in for an interesting surprise in a couple of years when he’s stuck dealing with a bitch who looks 75, and for his sake I just hope her pussy isn’t on the same course, because despite how sexy some 75 year olds are, their vaginas are pretty fuckin’ disgusting and smell like moth balls. At least that’s the story I heard…..

This entry was posted on Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008 at 3:15 pm and is filed under Bikini, Fergie. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.