I walked into some comedy show wasted a few months ago and it fucking sucked, before this dude Russel Brand got on stage. Sure his Amy Winehouse hair and jeans tighter than your asshole before you discovered you liked what how it felt when you started shoving thngs in your ass, threw me off a little, but he was legitimately funny. He had a good energy, vocabulary and his jokes were just smater than all the other comedians despite only being able to understand half of them. I told the girl I was with that he was going to be famous, and he told me he already was in the UK and worked at MTV. She said he had some kind of heroin addiction and now he was going Hollywood and I was surprised because normally the talent Hollywood picks up from overseas sucks.

He will be hosting the VMAs this weekend, the same VMAs that rejected press access for me, and if I cared enough and owned a TV, I’d consider watching it, but probably not to see this jackass use the same jokes I’ve already heard him use, but to see Christina in Britney’s shadow one more time, 15 years after being in her shadow started, like some kind of reunion because in case you haven’t heard, Britney is opening the show and based on these promo shots, I guess Aguilera will be playing the show, but we don’t really care about her, we just care about her beauty secrets, because deep down inside we all wish we could pull off this Asian, busty whore look. Seriously, she looks like a different person than she was, maybe it’s just a stand in and she’s off on the beach somewhere, but they say it’s really her and I guess we have no choice but to blame the jews because her jew Plastic Surgeons did this to her after she married a Jew and had its Jew baby. I’d still fuck her pregnancy gut at cum all over her stretchmarks but that’s just because I liked her at one time and can’t turn my back on her now that God has, not to mention those new eyes of her would help me play out my Vietnam war vetran fantasies of raping small jungle villages, the big fake titty, Hollywood version.

This entry was posted on Friday, September 5th, 2008 at 12:29 pm and is filed under Christina Aguilera, Tits, VMAS. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.