As Christina Aguilera was asked about motherhood and Lily Allen stood off camera crying to herself about what could have been if only her uterus was strong enough to withstand her self-destructive lifestyle, her tits remained ridiculous. I don’t really know what’s going on with Aguilera or whether she’s had a lot of plastic surgery done or not, but I do know that she looks a hell of a lot different that she used to and a hell of a lot more like a tacky bitch you’d see working at a tanning salon in some cleavage exposing outfit and I guess there’s nothing gay about that, what is gay is that you are at the fucking tanning salon, are you lookin’ for an even tan so that you look good in your new Ed Hardy T-shirt when you go to the club to buy bottles of Grey Goose, because everyone knows that it’s only masculine for a guy to have a tan if he got it doing something tough, like being stranded on a deserted island and forced to fend for himself, or if he got it raping and killing a small tropical village or some shit, but that doesn’t matter, what does matter is Aguilera’s cleavage from last night….

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