Perez Hilton is a glitch in the internet. He was a lonely, fame hungry, ugly, identity crisis homo, with no real talent, but an obsession with celebrity, that he took to the internet and thanks to a series of events, the right time and right place bullshit, and a gay voice in an era when people were becoming more accepting of that played up fag talk, except for real gay people, who considered him to be a fucking embarassment and clown to their sexuality.

His success in undeniable, his site is huge, he makes money and he leverages his name, he gets out there and milks his shit harder than he probably milks the guy he pays for sex because even with his “website” he still can’t get groupy cock, because having a website to begin with is fucking lame, even if the public is moving towards the interent more than fuckin ever and Perez Hilton is the only bullshit URL they know.

But the truth is that he’s not a fucking journalist, he reports lies, fake exclusives and shit other people are reporting before him, he just managed to be a machine about things and have lots of people tipping him off, but when people reference his site, I laugh because it’s just a fucking blog and like any other blog, the shit is opinion based and low fuckin’ quality so that’s why he is just a glitch, maybe even a military strategy from CUBA to infiltrate America where it counts, and that is with Hollywood, because up until Obama, Americans could identify the name of Britney Spears’ kids before they could identify they Secretary of State and it would be nice if he was sent back to CUBA where he and his family belong….

That said, dude is so desperate for friends that he has embraced the attention Lady Gaga’s been giving him, because she knows he has a huge audience and if she has to sit and watch his trashy disgusting mouth down a burger like the fat big he is, it’s worth the post he’ll write about it.

So this fucking reject of a person, finally feels acceptance from famous people, and he’s fucking smitten, he is fucking glowing like a 20 year old virgin who just got with the hot chick from his high school after randomly running into her during Thanksgiving back home, and you know that everything that Perez reports about Lady Gaga will be positive because they are Best Fucking Friends and she’s given him the time of fucking day, while every other celebrity who snobs him, or calls him out for the faggot loser he is, he rips apart on his site because he is emotionally involved and his website’s all he got going for him and he’s goin’ to show them.

Whether it’s posting Lily Allen nude pics cuz they had a twitter fight, or shitting on Lohan because Sam Ronson sued him and Paris Hilton had him on payroll, the whole thing is a fucking joke and you people are the root of the problem. All it takes is to stop visiting his site and he’ll go the fuck away and if you really need to hear a gay guy in action who is actually worth reading and not a fucking hack, you should be visiting Dlisted , because at least he’s got a little edge, a unique voice, good comedic fucking timing and isn’t a suck up bitch, especially not to some ugly poser like Gaga.

Not that any of that rant matters, she uses him, he uses her, they stroke each other’s egos and give each other credibility and hand jobs since she has a dick, and there is no way this ugly bitch is not a tranny, they are pigs, at least she’s wearing fucking pants, they don’t look human and both disgust me, so maybe they’re meant for each other and all it took was the internet to bring them together.

Here’s some video of Gaga after landing in LA.

This entry was posted on Monday, March 9th, 2009 at 3:42 pm and is filed under Groupie, Lady Gaga, Perez Hilton, Smitten. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.