My grandma always used to say, you don’t get lap dances from faces so when a homely lookin’ bitch comes your way and strikes up conversation with you about what your name is, if it is my first time in the place, if I am from the city, if I like the show or if I’m having a good time, missing teeth with wonky eyes, acne and a weak chin, take a step back and look at her tits because that’s what is gonna be in your motherfucking hands in 5 minutes, so I’ve tried to carry that attitude thru life in having no standards…

That said, I was walking down the street at 5 in the morning and ran into some crackhead, almost as tight bodied as Amy Winehouse, but dressed way more fucking crazy. I am talking like a fucking juggling clown, with a haggard face, on her way to the fucking carnival, with strappy shit, and knee high socks and a top hat, and the whole thing was fucking surreal, until she pulled out her vagina and it was the hairiest fucking thing I ever saw, but could make out her grey labia out of the fuzzy pillow, and I had to walk it out because I was laughing too hard to try to fuck her.

Either way, Amy Winehouse is looking pretty fucking amazing at court, her tits look solid and sure she’s not pretty, but she healthy and showered, which just goes to show you, drugs aren’t as bad as they say they are, especially considering that drugs are the reason I saw dirty pussy last night.

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