DrunkenStepfather – Celebrity Gossip, Entertainment, Good Times… » Blog Archive

I had a bet that I would fuck Christina Aguilera at one point in my life. In 1997 it seemed like it was possible. She was a good girl who had years ahead of her to go sour and I was an ambitious alcoholic who was addicted to drugs and totally fucking delusional and believed I was going to get to Hollywood and find a way to stick my dick inside the bitch…but with my laziness came marrying a fat chick for security and with her lack of a father came marrying a really ugly dude and having his baby pretty much killing herself without actually killing herseland I guess the whole thing officially went sour when the guy I made the bet with died in a car accident….but I can still celebrate her fake tits like I did when they were slowly being installed in installments so that she didn’t just show up after a vacation with huge tits, throwing off her 10 year old girl fans in a time when the world was way more sensitive….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

This entry was posted on Monday, February 1st, 2010 at 3:58 pm and is filed under Christina Aguilera, Tits. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

Drunken Pig

Well at least she has a half decent body…it offsets her horrid face!!…and you just know sluts really DIRTY in the sack!!
HornyLohanWanker

Those tits would make fine noshing fun bags.

I could suck on them all night.
fate

Hey, we look forward to you, yourself, dying in a car accident.

(Or if you don’t want to go auto fatality than by some other means. No problem. The key thing is just to end your life soon.)

Seriously. Get with it, Stepfather bitch!

Your world-weary cheesy, man-of-the-world tone of late has been a particular embarrassment, by the way. (Really, take a second to contemplate how lame it is, how sad your efforts to seem cool are.)

Face facts: you’ll always be a rage-filled provincial Canuck and the sooner you put an end to your sorrowful little life the better it’ll be for everyone.

You know you want to die. Do it.
hey

agree with fate. die, dipshit
Moe

Too bad such a hot chick is with an ugly kike like that. What a waste. I bet he complains during sex.
Bob Smith

I dunno, I think she’s kinda hot.

Fate is whinny though. It’s either a woman or a gay guy. Straight guys don’t whine like that.
jpump

the reason you ended up with someone who you clearly don’t give 2 shits about it your attitude.
it stinks.
objectifying women and talking about them like a cum rag generally means you won’t get anyone half decent because half-decent means intellegent enough to have some self-worth and respect.
you clearly have no self esteem as you write bitter, hateful things everyday and go home to a family you could not possibly care less about.
that’s a sad, pathetic life.
i’m suprised your NOT dead yet, as any self-respecting male would have found the wherewithal to alter his situation or indeed, kill himself.
Thanks for sullying the gene pool.
please post the name of your child so we can ask child protective services to have it taken away from you and put into a loving supportive household, “fatass”. You should have been sterilized years ago.
what the hell

go back to dr. phi.l you faggots, no one cares about your analysis
Greasy

fate sucks!
Annabelle

Are you idiots (fate, etc) completely unaware that this is SATIRE? That the person who writes this is in real life, is probably a normal guy??

He’s not Mexican, he’s not married to a fat, lazy bitch, he does know sentence construction..

Some of you were obviously born without a sense of humor.
Drunken Pig

I was born with a raging hard-on…and an ability to consume obscene amounts of alcohol !!…things remain that way to this day!!
m

Drunken Pig, is it raging or Flaming
Bob Smith

“you clearly have no self esteem as you write bitter, hateful things everyday and go home to a family you could not possibly care less about.”

That’s not true. Your mother is very appreciative. She even pays.

Christina Aguilera’s Mom Tits of the Day