DrunkenStepfather – Celebrity Gossip, Entertainment, Good Times… » Blog Archive » Jessica Simpson is a Big Lady in Red of the Day

I think I realize why Jessica Simpson is so crazy in bed. It’s not because her ex-husband was a queer who could only get off if she fucked him like a dude, but more to do with a fat chick with a dream of getting married and having a family of her own. If you ever go home with that dolled up fat chick, only to learn she’s got 4 cats and a subscription to wedding magazines and baby name books on her coffee table, you can be pretty fucking sure you’re in for a good ride because all the bitch really wants from you is your cum inside her, as her desperation has got to that point where she’d actually bang you in the first place…

So when I see Jessica Simpson, I see hope. I just need another 20 pounds, a few more failed relationships and bad dates, and access to be within 10 feet of her because when that happens, her pussy will be so craving, even homeless dick is dick that can give her what she wants, and hell the homeless dick may be crazy, but at least it will stick around for the bed and food in the fridge…

Pics via Bauer

This entry was posted on Monday, March 15th, 2010 at 4:11 pm and is filed under Big, Jessica Simpson, Red. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

Billdozer

I’d like to sheet of plastic and put it over my bed and get a gallon of olive oil and Then Jessica and me would get naked and roll all over it until I couldn’t cum anymore
MEGADOUCHE

I like ‘em cornfed and horny. I’d bang her mercilessly for at least 4 to 5 mins. I hope she’s good at making sammiches.
Drunken PIG

She’d better watch out,the last “lady in red” now clocks in at about 280lbs!!
stfu

She doesn’t look fat, just chunky, but you don’t care since you like malnourished 80 lbs crackwhores.
With that said Jessica still has a butterface.
Bob Smith

She just needs to lose 15 pounds and she’s look even better.
cowbulls

Yes I agree she needs to lose a few pounds. Mayer confirmed my opinion that Jessica and other curvy women like Jennifer Love Hewitt are awesome in bed.
Nailing a skinny chick usually results in bruises from her hipbones and very little sexual satisfaction.
Leslie Butterscotch

What’s not to love about a fat chick who loves it in the ass?
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