Megan Fox was out in here bikini showing off the branded she stain she got from her handler/owner/kidnapper/brain washer/satan who abused her into thinking she can’t survive without his has been dick…because he got her when she was young and insignificant and he molded her into the co-dependent slave and she makes him feel relevant and he makes her look fucking pathetic…..

Sure fucking the hottest pussy in hollywood since she was 18, and owning her, cuz he was her teenage crush is good for him, I mean it’s better than Gary Coleman’s hasbeen life….but now that she’s been dropped from the one gig she makes money off of, he’s gotta act fast so that she doesn’t leave him to suck off some dick that can get her work, so he let her out of her cage and got her in her bikini, to remind dudes who and what Megan Fox is, hoping to get guys excited for her again – I am okay with that strategy….here are the pics….

Pics via Bauer

This bitch had her uncle pay for her career, not that she has a career, but whatever she did to get her name out there enough for me to know who she is, and now I guess he is paying for the paparazzi to take pictures of her because whatever they did the first time, to get her to this level of whatever it is that her hardly hot body has didn’t work out as well as she hoped, so here she is acting a fool in some desperate attempt that I can get behind because bikini pictures are always awesome…s…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Mayim Bialik is giving jewish girls a bad name…Seriously. Most Jewish girls have personal trainers, eat healthy, wear expensive clothes, get their hair and make-up done weekly, but every once in a while one slips through the crackes and ends up dumpy, ass faced and inbred looking like this Blossom bitch. When the show was on the air I felt she had no business being on TV and now that it’s over, I feel like she has no business being alive. Seriousl, this is the face that would make anyone jump out the second floor window when they walk by the hallway mirror, or worse, if they wake up next to it after a night of hard drinking, only to see her empty the contents of the used condom inside her to feel what love and commitment actually feels like, and to hopefully get knocked up so that she has a legacy, gets to follow nature’s course and gets to live a normal life as a mother but more importantly to feel like somone other than her parents actually love her…no offense or anything.

Here she is licking her lips for those of you who like tongue and don’t care who it belongs to…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Kristen Stewart is not hot – but you would think she is based on all the coverage she gets…people are always talking about her white trash, mother and father are sister and brothers who went a little too far one night of drinking too much moonshine and chewing tobacco in the outhouse they used to shit in, and 9 months later dropped her ugly baby ass out of her vagina into, because she had no idea she was pregnant, she just thought she ate herself some bad road kill…..

Here are some pics of her showing off some little popular tit….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

It is a long weekend in the states…I figure I would be a fucking idiot to post when most of my two readers are drunk in ditch somewhere, so I’ll come in and out if something relevant happens like RIP Motherfucker Dennis Hopper….or Lindsay Lohan dies from the flesh eating disease she got in her pussy from an inflamed scab….

Here is Marlena Szoka, some model, I’ve never heard of showing some tit…..cuz she’s hot…and so is the first long weekend of the summer….

It’s the long weekend. Fuck making you read nonsense and encourage you to get out there and do something instead. I know as a socially awkward weirdo, life away from your computer is scary, cold and lonely, but seriously motherfucker, you should not be online reading my site, get a hobby….take up bird watching…and by bird watching I mean stalking hot pussy, make yourself useful and send me pics…..and if you’re lazy, awkward, ashamed to be alive and happy on your computer, then click these links like Heidi and Spencer do anything fo publicity….like staging divorces…when really they should just kill themselves….

Here are my stepLINKS….

It’s the long weekend for you lazy Americans so I figured I needed to get you in the spirit of the first real weekend of summer…and in honor of your holiday, I’ve been lazy and hungover today, pretty much slacking all day because I figure it is only fitting and there’s probably no one online, but in my defense, I’m not slacking nearly as hard as Gary Coleman…RIP Motherfucker…..

Here is some model named Nika Lauraitis in her bikini from some magazine called Flare out of Canada…and I love bikini pics on everyone, especially models, cuz they aren’t fat, even when they are no named models cuz bikinis are a good thing….

I don’t think these pictures are new, but who really cares when they were taken, because there’s a naked, natural tittied bitch from the UK….Sure, I’d rather see some snatch lip, but that’s just because tits are so played out, from cleavage, to strip clubs, to beaches in Europe, that I don’t get excited seeing them, I am titty jaded and titty desensitized, sure I still like tits and recommend that all you bitches send in pictures of your tits, but if you reeally want to make a difference in any of our lives, take off your pants and spread eagle yourself in pics, I’m talking to you Kelly Brook….and here are her tame but still topless pictures….

Dita Von Teese is a fucking scam. Girls this ugly can’t tease me…I know they are fucking bullshit. She is ugly as fuck. She knows it but she wanted male attention, so she created a character on the internet before the internet had good looking girls, a character who was some 1940′s burlesque dancer / pin-up girl cuz it was popular for fat chicks to be into that shit at the time and it landed her in Playboy and then into the mainstream…where she makes millions doing these stage shows that are better off left dead like the bitches who actually created the shit so many years ago. It is dated. It is lesbionic and gothic. They don’t show pussy, even though she was in dyke porn before her fame hit and I fucking hate it and everything it stands for….mainly because I hate ugly chicks, with freakish bird faces…even when they show off their stupid tits to distract us.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Rihanna should be making beds at luxury villas in Barbdos, not making music videos or hit songs in America. She was from a shanty with a garbage man father I am going to keep saying this cuz maybe one day it will come true…

I watched it on mute cuz the Rihanna sound irritates me, but there is lots of lingerie. lots of lesbianism. It is sexed up and trying to stay relevant by keeping up with Gagas and as long as there is lots of lingerie and shit is sexed up…I’ll keep posting it…cuz no matter how much I hate a bitch a but I can see past it when it’s barely clothed and humping the air like a horny dog looking for attention so that she doesn’t get back to her teenage prostitute life she came from…and really who fucking cares, just watch the video if you like simple minded girls who get attention by doing subtle dyke shit cuz guys are morons and it excites them….but really only excites me cuz I know there will be local copycats….

In keeping up with what models who were once the hottest fucking thing to hit, you know back when they were young and claimed to still be a virgin…..before America ruined her strict Catholic upbringing and gave her tight Brazilian ass a taste of cock that it had been craving….leading to a pregnancy that totally destroyed her body and appeal….here are some pics of Adriana Lima to remind us of what was, what could of been and the unfortunate truth of what is….a bloated rendition of what could have at one time been the single hottest pussy on earth that had been found…either way, I still dig her and her ripped apart pussy and body…and you probably do too…because it’s Adriana Lima and because we are perverts who like pussy in a variety of shapes, sizes, colors and conditions….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

I don’t know who Paramore is, so I’m not sure if this picture that is being emailed to me is of the lead singer or not. It could be any Goth, Emo, Annoying, Played out, teenage angst lookin cunt who rarely turn me on cuz I like my pussy lookin’ wholesome, not damaged teenage runaway turned prostitute/stripper who listens to dark music and cries cuz she is so obscure and into art and dressing like every other teenage girl who thinks she’s obscure and into art…it’s not for me..

I am not sure these are recent. I just know that they were apparently posted to twitter. Maybe it was accidental, despite nothing ever being accidental in Hollywood or entertainment, so I can just assume it’s a publicity stunt that will be spun as some kind of horrible story we all end up feeling sorry for her down the road cuz tits are a sacred thing in America and you shouldn’t be going out showing the world or some shit that I don’t agree with because I love tits and think every girl should be forced to go out topless, and I’m just hoping these Paramore pics help influence at least one girl to take topless pictures of herself cuz it’s really not a big deal, I mean everyone’s got tits, even me, so you might as well just be showing them off and sending them to my info (at) drunkenstepfather.com email….you see what I just did there, didn’t you…I’ll let you know if anyone sends any it….

This Tyler Shields dude is clearly someone Lohan is fucking because she’s been letting him take pictures of her enough to establish a name for himself. I wish she was that good to me cuz riding her coat tails as well as her used up, dried up pussy would be lovely as far as I’m concerned….

Here she is in some preview stills of her Linda Lovelace movie that I don’t think has been shot yet, but that I know is going to be her break out role, like she was Mickey Rourke or Halle Berry or whoever was down and out and made a comeback with a riveting role that’s hardly far from the truth cuz Lohan’s deep throat ability is what got her this far and pretty much all she’s been doing the last few years…along with drinking, drugs, getting arrested and a stint with lesbianism….

Here is the actual Linda Lovelace…

She was the star of deep throat who died ..not that you care

I am pretty bitter because a site I helped out by giving them a URL to register for me and a list of my contacts from doing this site before being cut out of the deal just sold for millions of dollars and I didn’t get any of it…so as they retire and live the good life…I get to struggle to pay for this bottle of whiskey I am drinking…I mean if you cosider sneaking in your wife’s purse a struggle….I guess part of me likes keeping shit ghetto.

Here are my stepLINKS….

Yesterday I had the great honor of being the first to bring you a clip from Kendra Wilkinson’s Sex Tape Kendra Exposed ….it was one of my first exclusives and the whole thing was pretty exciting for me as I am normally really useless..but not as exciting as the fact that KendraExposed is available online right now…and I know how much all you fuckers love celebrity sex tape…no matter what level of celebrity the bitch in the sex tape actually has….

I bought the Kendra Sex Tape last night using friend’s credit card when he passed out drunk….Here are my quick notes….

She starts off with a stripshow…her hair is thick and horselike, clearly bitch was a stripper or spent a lot of time at the stripclub. She does all the standard stripper moves. From the ass flex, booty shake all set to some updated porno beats that are still cheesy as fuck, but that’s really what you want, especially when it flushed out Kendra’s voice…

Like any 18 year old in 2003, she does not like him to zoom in on her, maybe because she’s got a vagina complex, which I understand, because her pussy is pretty meaty, discolored and uncontained, dried up prune and wise beyond its years that may be 18 but looks like it could be 80 and in need of a wax, but most pussy is, making her no different than everyone else, but unlike current nude pics of her, there was no photoshop used…and thankfully unlike the current state of her pussy now that she’s had twins….

They fuck on a white trash bed with some cat comforter waterbed shit you’d expect many bottles were returned to pay for…cuz we all gotta start our porn career somewhere – whether it is in the trailer park, our dad’s workshop, or the back alley….or on a ghetto bed….

She tries hard to pull thru, she knows she’s filming a porn, she puts some serious effort into it…sure I’ve had better sex than this, less awkward conversation and joking around about PRECUM….the precum of a dude who sucks at directing, but more importantly looks fucking retarded, like some serious white trash with some real dumb looking teeth, who fucks like a lazy slob, and keeps Kendra working….

So girls, let this be warning – film a sex tape when you get the chance – cuz you never know when you’ll need it to pay the bills….or when you’ll want to release it to remind people of what you had when you were younger….

The big question this sex tape brings up is what other quality dudes she has had inside her… and the good news is that unlike the movies you’re into she doesn’t die at the end…weirdo….

The movie is awesome. I loved watching it. The ending is on another level of weird. Kendra’s not that hot. But fucking on tape is fucking on tape….

Here are some NSFW screen caps….but the whole site is mildly NSFW according to most so if you’re hear already…then you should be fine…