Here are some really boring pictures of Courtney Cox at a beach party that looks staged, which I guess means she gets work other than the Scream movies that found her an awkward husband….she wasn’t wearing a bikini, which is probably a good thing, because she’s so fucking old, but instead picked up a guitar like some kind of tree hugging lesbian singing about the environment or using menstrual cups or someshit….and as far as I’m concerned shit is really only a beach party if a bitch in a bikini gets too drunk for her own good and disappears with some strange man, never to be found again….

Pics via PacificCoastNews
Pics via Bauer

James Blunt is a genius, sure his songs are something you can not get down to if you have a cock, unlesss that cock likes rubbin up against other cock, because there was a serious science put behind his work and that was to write the most sensitive sappy shit imanginable about fantasies all women have and that make all their panties wet, like love at first sight on the subway and other cliche love related shit all sung with a hurting voice, like he really was affected by the shit, making every pussy in the world shed a tear for the motherfucker.

Now he’s living in Ibiza, the sleaziest party spot in the world, where pussy is plentiful and every single one of them dreams the next hit Blunt single will be about them and how they broke his heart….

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This is another one of Paris Hilton’s guests at her weekend beach party. Her name is Caroline D’Amore, her parents own a pizza restaurant and she is 23 years old. I did my research on her because she looks like she’s fucking 12 and even if that shit turns you on, I don’t want to go to jail for being a child pornographer because I hear they cut you in prison for that shit, and I don’t find that shit too sexy, I am more on the parents against pedophiles side of the argument you boylover.

Reality is that I always loved those teen models who were in their 20s but pretended they were teens to get people like you off. It reminded me of Peter Pan and this girl I used to bang who was 10 years older than me but looked 10 years younger than me. I guess she was the runt of the litter or someshit, and when she was in highschool and looked 7 no one wanted a piece, but when she was 27 and looked 17 the tables fucking turned proper. That’s the problem with over-developed teen girls, they all end up getting fat when the skinny awkward ones fill out the way they’re supposed to.

Either way, I used to look at their sites because I had nothing better to do and the alternative was looking at haggard sluts with their uterus’ hanging out of their cunts so innocent and fresh was more of a fantasy than old and washed up because you always want what you don’t have.

I guess what I am getting at is that when they are 23, they are fair game and when they have their boyfriend’s name tattooed next to their cunt, they are stupid enough to end up with a guy like you, so keep the faith motherfucker…