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Archive for the ‘Mischa Barton’ Category

Mischa Barton’s Not So Hot Bikini Top of the Day

Tuesday, January 3rd, 2012

I find it dull that Mischa Barton is alive….I’m not a psychopath or even a sociopath who wishes death on people for the sake of wishing death on people….even though I think most people are idiots…I prefer to just laugh at them cuz they are entertaining…..I don’t even have dead hookers in my basement….and everyone knows hookers aren’t real people….so when I say Mischa Barton is better off dead…I mean it in a good way…See she’s all tormented and shit….looks like shit and shit….is boring as shit and shit….has addictions and issues that lead to her unshowered, sloppy and probably stinky twat. I had a death watch going on the site and now it’s on hiatus…cuz she’s cleaned up a bit…but I know there needs to be a celebrity death in 2012, we’re a few days in and I want some morbid scandals with these idiots….and here are some bikini top pictures….dull…but still a bikini……I should be on the beach getting pics of hot pussy in a bikini…instead of posting these useless idiots…but I can’t help myself…it’s a horrible habbit.

Mischa Barton’s Bikini Pics of the Day

Wednesday, December 28th, 2011

I used to do a Mischa Barton death watch back when she was in therapy and tending to some kind of addiction I’m not sure was ever exploited or explained for the sheer fact that no one gives a fuck about Mischa Barton and whether she died tomorrow or even 4 years ago…no one’s life would really fucking change…she’s a low impact celebrity….

Either way, she was bloated, disgusting to look at, unshowered and she likely stank…but for some reason she pulled it together…probably thanks to the millions in her bank and its ability to hire trainers and handlers…and now she’s looking tight enough bodied on the beach for me to want the disgusting sloppy past off her with my mouth…I’m weird like that.

Mischa Barton Tries To Stay Relevant via Tyler Shields Steak to the Face of the Day

Tuesday, October 11th, 2011

I used to rip into Tyler Shields for being a hack of a photographer who just managed to have the right celebrity friends that propelled him into photographer celebrity….but then I spoke to someone who knows him and she assures me that he’s not some try hard, full of shit, obvious attempt at shocking concept with celebrity pussy like he was the next Terry Richardson with less vision….and even if he was, who cares, cuz I’m the fucker writing about his work…adding fuel to the fire that is his hype….

That said, he recruited Mischa Barton, which must have been hard, you know with her busy schedule, substance abuse, sanity….but I have a funny feeling she’s the one who sought him out…to get these pics of steak on her face, in a photo series that I call “I shoulda been Tyler Shields, I’m clever enough to make shocking pictures, if only I didn’t alienate myself”….

Here she is…

Mischa Barton’s Death Watch is Back on of the Day

Tuesday, July 19th, 2011

I used to do this Mischa Barton Death Watch when she was at her absolute worst….but it got boring, everyone forgot who Mischa Barton and we moved onto more interesting damanged pussy….

I don’t know I get bored of the poor little tormented rich girl who became an actress, made a lot of money and quit her show, only to spend that money on Cocaine and pills to supress the inner demons, and come out expecting everyone to have sympathy for your awesome lifestyle and you’re spoiled brat attempt to get on track, only to fall off track again, in an up and down motion, more fluctuating than her weight….that proves no matter what size she is, she’s still fucking sloppy, boring, and irritating….but not quite the same kind of boring as Rachel Bilson, cuz at least Mischa Barton’s got flavor, sure it’s probably unwashed, possible STD infected pussy flavor, while Rachel Bilson’s just vanilla lotion and overbearing husbanded, so here she is living….I guess we’re we’re just not sure for how much longer….and all this doesn’t answer the age old question….why aren’t these pics of her nude…

Mischa Barton’s Sloppy Bikini Body of the Day

Tuesday, May 3rd, 2011

Mischa Barton is not dead. That amazes me….

If feels like just last year, she was drunk, drugged and ready to throw in the towel, but for some reason she’s ended up on the beaches of Hawaii in a bikini, a place few peopel go to die, I mean other than retirees….I really thought the demise of her career, her missing the chance to be a pussy flasher, sex tape producer, when people still cared, and addiction due to demons we’ll never understand, was enough to put her under…

And really what it comes down to is dead or not, Mischa Barton still looks horrible to me….

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Mischa Barton Bending Over for Old TImes of the DAy

Wednesday, February 9th, 2011

I like to look at Mischa Barton pictures as a morning inspiration. It’s like after seeing her thick, messy, useless self bend over, I don’t feel so bad about myself. If she hasn’t killed herself after going from the hot dead puking kid under the bed people used to jerk off to in The Sixth Sense, and by people I mean me, to going to a hit show as the main fucking character, to this out of work, sloppy, drug addicted drunk with a fat ass, all in front of the people, then why should I…..

Mischa Barton is a suicide help line – and here she is bending her pig self over….cuz if you’re like me, you don’t like fat women, but they never say no, especially if you put donuts around your cock….that’s when shit gets nutty.

All this to say, at least I’m not Mischa Barton…

Mischa Barton in Leather Shorts in Paris of the Day

Wednesday, September 29th, 2010

Here are a couple of drugged out lookin’ pussy at some event thinkin’ they are fashionable and awesome, when really they look haggard and disgusting….because Mischa Barton is a disaster, but she managed to squeeze her fat, sloppy legs into a pair of leather shorts….

She’s currently in Paris, in the event you were wondering “where in the world in Mischa Barton going to die?”…

She is keeping good company with Montrealer and likely heroin user Irina Lazareanu, who I’ve never had the chance to finger bang in the backseat of her parent’s car, cuz she moved to London when she was 13 and for fear my finger would fall off due to disease…cuz she met Pete Doherty at 15, and was engaged to him a couple of times in some kind of love triangle with Kate Moss, I am sure all you idiots really care about….

On a more interesting tip, I was just walking down the street to an abandoned building near a high school I like to hang out in and cry myself to sleep in cuz my life is shit, and I walked in on two 14 or 15 year old bull dykes making out, with their school uniform pants, cuz they are bull dykes and don’t do the whole “skirt” thing, and it was not very hot…and luckily, either is Mischa, otherwise my story would totally be irrelevant, and I need her nastyness in lesbian state to make it all make sense….

I guess that means she’s no longer irrelevant and that I just found her purpose she’s been looking for, and that’s as the spokesperson for ugly lesbian stories….oh and her shirt is see through too…in the event you are blind…

Mischa Barton Working on her Own Reality Show of the Day

Monday, August 16th, 2010

When you hit rock bottom and you were once a celebrity, you really have limited options of what you can do. Either you kill yourself from a drug overdose, or you get a reality show. Both are equally depressing, but one is a little less fatal…leaving you hope that maybe one day it will all turn around…even if it takes making a total mockery of yourself…while pretending to be working…when really you’re just doing the same nothing you do everyday…only idiots feel compelled to watch it…cuz your shitty life is substantially better than their shitty life cuz you were on a TV show for a minute…

So apparently Mischa Barton thinks her life is interesting enough to follow and she is in the process of filming a pilot of her own reality show called “Smells like Garbage, Tastes like Sewage, Looks Unwashed and Bloated” cuz that’s really what her life has become….

Seriously, what the fuck is going to happen in her show…are we gonna watch her eat donuts, not shower, sit on her couch, get high and cry about the good OC Days….

There is nothing interesting about her, and maybe that’s the hook….and I guess who really cares…I just gotta say the obvious, a sex tape woulda been a better strategy…

The whole thing is stupid.

Mischa Barton Smoking Weed in a Bikini Top of the Day

Thursday, August 12th, 2010

I never thought I’d see disgusting fucking pigs smoke…but then again I don’t spend much time in the backwoods learning how to fuck with farm animals…

I also never thought Mischa Barton would still be alive…she looks like fucking death.

I just know she’s crying for attention…cuz despite what she looks like, she is a fucking attention whore who wishes her career took a different root, just like this fat chick who couldn’t land a husband so she booked an all inclusive vacation to jamaica to get knocked up, who after her pregnancy would get on all fours in the park and milk herself like a cow…but instead of paparazzi taking pics of her, the police took her away and then child protection took her kid, then i took her anal virginity and we lived happily ever after, the end.


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Dumpy Mischa Barton Kisses Some Gay Dude Badly of the Day

Thursday, July 15th, 2010

Mischa Barton is looking pretty fucking disgusting. She’s fat and ratty and is either on drugs to medicate all her broken dreams and justifiable feelings of inadequacies, or she’s just being a hipster who does shower or get her hair done, but who takes her flashy jazz shoes seriously, and really who cares about Mischa Barton, she’s a think of the past, I mean other than the clearly gay dude who is pretending to be her boyfriend cuz gay dudes love fat, broken chicks with any level of celebrity, especially if they pay their way….I mean if you notice, motherfucker is scared to kiss the bitch, but in defense to his sexuality, so would most straight dudes….

Pics via Bauer

Mischa Barton is Drunk or High of the Day

Friday, July 9th, 2010

Mischa Barton is looking like a fucking mess. She’s either drunk, medicated or both and she looks like fucking shit, unless of course you find Boy George hot, cuz that’s what she fucking looks like….

Either way she’s with some Euro lookin’ dude who must be gay cuz he looks way too fucking excited to be dancing with Mischa Barton…he’s the kind of guy who goes nuts over anyone he has seen on TV on any level…from seeing the local news anchor in Starbucks to meeting the host of an appliance warehouse sale commercial when buying a dryer to the getting off on a dude he original saw in a mug shot for some gay brothel bust…because glitz and glam is something he likes to attach himself to….even if the glitz and glam smells and looks like death…especially when paparazzi are there to make him feel important…

Pics via Fame

Mischa Barton’s Hot Enough for Me of the Day

Wednesday, June 30th, 2010

I think the fall of Mischa Barton happened years ago when she stupidly wore shorts out and everyone saw her sloppy, cellulite ridden legs, despite being a relatively skinny girl. Everyone laughed and pointed and didn’t really let the fact that it was a hereditary deformity that comes with hormonal imbalances, diet and a variety of other things she couldn’t really control, leading to getting no work, hard drinking and drug use and now this….which isn’t all that bad, or as bad as people are making it out to be, because when girls look like this, it usually means they’ll fuck you, whether it’s for money, for food, or just because they are crazy and have no idea what the fuck is going on, and that’s always a good thing, except maybe if it comes with HIV, which it usually does…

That said, it is safe to say that Mischa Barton is going to die…so jerk off to her while you can, because if you’ve learned anything from Michael Jackson’s death, it gets weird after a while knowing he’s dead…who am I kidding…no it doesn’t….

Pics via Fame

Mischa Barton is Scary as Fuck of the Day

Friday, May 21st, 2010

Mischa Barton is a fucking wreck. Maybe this is the aftermath of being the second line pussy on some teen TV show that made getting more work impossible after the series fell apart. But I like to think it has to do with being eaten up by the media, leading to her drinking and popping pills to feel good about herself, eventually giving up on showering and caring about herself, leaving her a fat sloppy mess I’m just wating to see overdose, cuz it’s time for another Hollywood suicide…..and looking at her freaky fucking face in a wedding dress is scarier than her breakout role as the dead girl under the bed in the Sixth Sense you all wanted to fuck cuz she was at her hottest, perverts….I feel like we don’t need to do the Deathwatch anymore, she’s already dead on the inside, sure her heart is pumping but there’s no fucking soul behind these glassed over eyes, like a brain dead vegetable in the hospital and I say it is time to pull the fucking plug…..but on the positive side, she’s got pretty rockin’ tits in this wedding dress she’s modeling, reminding me that now is a good time to move in on her because she’s desperate, cuz she’s probably better to fuck than the old ladies I tried to recruit at the old folks home into putting me into her will, and I can only hope there’s at least one opportunist working his way into securing this Mischa Barton as his prime zombie bride, cuz girls who drug up themselves to make bad decisions are better than girls you have to drug to make bad decsions, because you can’t get arrested for the shit…..

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Mischa Barton’s Fat Ass Tries to Unlock her Car of the Day

Thursday, April 22nd, 2010

I am a firm believer of kicking bitches when they are down, especailly when they’ve been treated too well in life up until now….and Mischa Barton is clearly really fucking down….and no one has told her emotionally eating won’t get her out of it…but maybe enough hard drugs she’s clearly been dabbling in will…so here’s the pig trying to unlock her car door but she’s having issues cuz pigs don’t know how to unlock car doors cuz they’re too busy rolling around in their own filth being pigs…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Mischa Barton is a Bloated Pig of the Day

Tuesday, March 30th, 2010

I watched the OC back when every college girl watched the OC and I needed to know what was going on to fit in at every college party I would go to because they had the cheapeat drinks and the best, drunkest, slutty girls….the most common drunken conversation was whether Mischa Barton or Rachel Bilson were hotter, I know, I can’t believe I would have such pathetic virginal conversations, but they did land me some serious playtime with young pussy and it was worth it. Either way, girls would always say how Mischa Barton was the hot one and I just didn’t get it cuz she always looked like she does in these pictures to me. I always new she was a bloated sloppy pig of a woman just waiting until the show was off the air to let herself go and I was right….

I don’t know what’s going on with this girl, but I know it’s nothing good, but maybe gutter pig women on the verge of death are your thing, because they are usually too unstable and weak to say no to anal, but what the fuck do I know.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

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