A couple of weeks ago Burger King got in trouble for putting a black chick in an ad about fried chicken…something that based on the black people I know…seemed pretty culturally relevant….but no one seemed to give a fuck when they put Sofia Vergara as a Burger King worker, something equally culturally relevant, except that Vergara was more of a whore than the other Colombians, you know sucking coke dealing millionaire dick until they helped her get famous with her tits….tits that Burger King didn’t exploit despite her willingness to exploit them….making that the real tragedy of this campaign….but at least they tried to save themselves by using Salma Hayek’s Mexican Mom Tits…..and here’s the Salma Hayek ad…that I should be getting paid to post, but I’m not.
Here’s the less successful Sofia Vergara ad….for obvious reasons….like no cleavage and total misuse of her…
National Cleavage Day is over, I guess this Mexican, like all Mexicans didn’t get the fucking memo, cuz they were too busy changing sheets in hotel rooms and working in kitchens or gardens for you gringo pieces of shit….or maybe, just maybe, Salma Hayek’s been using her big fucking tits, and the cleavage they provide, for the last two decades to get herself fucking famous, cuz people like looking at big tits, apparently even if they are on moms in their 40s, cuz guys are half retarded like that, myself included…..
Here she is in some magazine spread that would be better if she was spread….
You know Old Mexican Whore Tits always remind me of my mother. God rest her soul. Like Salma Hayek, she too was a busty Mexican whore, only instead of fucking movie producers, she was fucking asshole white middle to low level management who crossed the border looking for happiness back in the late 60s…. It’s not her fault- she had illegit children to feed….until we were taken away and she died.
Wow…..this is a really happy post about tits busting out of Salma Hayek’s mom shirt….
I don’t think this is actually Salma Hayek laying golden eggs, from what I’d imagine, she’s likely menopausal….and well past her child bearing years…..so maybe this is just her shitting gold…you know because compared to the shanty town, donkey shit made huts her friends she grew up with in Mexico and how they are living, she pretty much does shit gold….so why not share that talent with the fucking world…..It is thanksgiving after all…
There’s nothing quit like watching a mom ass in a pair of period friendly shorts cuz she’s likely menopausal and the only discharge she risks leaking out of her box will get tapped in her incontinence pad…doing errands…I mean other than watching all the other bitches in the world with better bodies doing their menial daily tasks like shopping for bikinis, studying for college exams, or getting drunk and dancing on bars….Don’t get me wrong Mom Body with period friendly shorts jacked up her ass is amazing…and all…cuz I have an addiction to wanting to see as many vaginas as I can on any given woman I happen to cross paths with….so I don’t discriminate…but I will say…Salma Hayek’s seen better mexican starlet with big tits days….but here are the pics anyway…
Here are some pictures of Salma Hayek looking like a streetwalker, cuz I like streetwalkers enough to pretend every girl on the street near a car is a streetwalker and treating them accordingly, it’s kinda my thing…
I guess what it comes down to is that as a Mexican celebrity straight from Mexico, she really was only a few bad blowjobs away from ending up working the street, and if she did end up down that road, like so many Mexicans before her, she’d likely be far skinnier, more haggard, and giving off a strong odor of shit not chanel.
But this is just one of those “things just worked out for her” for reasons I call “great tits” that were perfect to play the mexican part in some Hollywood shit to keep it authentic….
I still think she woulda made a better hooker and I think these pics prove it.
I wonder how many people made the Puss & Boobs joke when posting pictures of Salma Hayek and Antonio Banderas at some movie premiere. I’m thinking at least one.
So a spic and a spaniard walk in a bar…no wait, she’s a Mexican and Mexicans get mad when you call them Spics, cuz we ain’t no J.Lo….
I haven’t figured out why I’m doing this post, maybe cuz bitch isn’t exposing her big tits enough to keep me happy and I’m responding angrily by associating her with the other trash I post about….or maybe I’m doing it because I’m from Mexican descent and I know she’s our National pride cuz she is the best looking thing Mexico has produced, I mean other than my Dirty Taco eating ass.
This post is a disaster. Fuck you Hayek for Hiding You Tits.
I like the kind of women who aren’t 40 year old mothers with full lookin’ bodies to match their massively full lookin tits…who are eager to show off their tits that made them famous…cuz they are appreciative of the fact that they aren’t working at a resort cleaning off shit, piss, cum and puke off the Cancun hotel wall….and they know what we pay the movie tickets that made her famous for….the kind of bitch who under any and all circumstances would never cover up her titties when she knew the paparazzi was around cuz she wanted to get as many miles out of them as humanly possible before she’s too fucking old for us to care cuz all old ladies have big tits….You know the kind of bitch who risks drowning, discomfort, death, to give her audience what they came for…
I guess with money, success, fame, marriage, stability comes no longer caring or working for the people who jerked off to her tits countless times….That drive has disappeared and she’s got soft. Literally…
Here she is on a waverunner, covered up, reminding us that she’s over and done with.
I guess that’s no real surprise cuz like all girls who had big tits in thier 20s, when they turn 30 the rest of them slowly follows their titty’s lead and by 40 turns into real thick…not the mention this bitch is a Mexican, and I have never met a slim Mexcian mother before….
So the fact that this Mexican isn’t being carted around on a medical scooter with diabetes is a testament to how hard she is fighting her Mexican genetics…..something that probably isn’t worth celebrating in her bikini, but since I like all pussy in bikinis, it’s good enough for me, even if it’s sending a bad message to young girls everywhere that ou can be proud of your mom body any shape it is and parade it around like it’s not a disgusting fucking mess…
I know Salma Hayek is not the same Salma Hayek she once was, but as a Mexican I see it as my job to promote all good things Mexican and no matter how old her tits are, they are pretty much the best export other than Mexican food to eat and Ugly Betty to laugh at…
It’s one of those, whether she’s old or not, it doesn’t matter, cuz Mexican women aren’t meant to look this way, they are meant to be short, dumpy by 22 and moms to multiple kids fed by their hard work making hotel beds and their dad’s spend the day in siesta…but maybe I’m just throwing out stereotypes you white people want to hear….maybe the truth is all pussy in Mexica is Salma Hayek caliber, but I wouldn’t know, I haven’t been there since I was 5.
Here is her great mom cleavage…worth fucking a pinata over…I’ll tell you that much…slutty and conservative all at the sametime..this is like business casual…but better…and just as confusing…
Salma Hayek may be older, thicker and a mom, but she’s still Salma Hayek and she’s doing pretty fucking good in these pictures.
I was one of the many dudes who thought her Mexican face wasn’t hairy enough to turn me off of her curvy fucking body, and I’m may have giving up on her, you know traded her in for younger, fresher pussy, but I’m not giving up on her now, she’s recruited me back into her fan club, even though I hate Mexican women cuz they remind me of my dead whore mother…not because of her rotting pussy, but because she’s Mexican….but her weight gain and pregnancy has brought her even bigger fucking tits, and since I don’t get to fuck her, I don’t really care how mangled her pussy has become….I just like that she’s out there, showing the other busty starlets that they aren’t anything special, cuz everyone with a little tit can get themselves a push-up bra and a low cut shirt…and as a perverted blogger…I’m glad she did cuz this is a magical reminder of great tits from a simpler time…
Salma Hayek’s tis are on tour. I guess they are promotion a movie but I like to think they are just promoting her. They make me forget that she’s old and a mom now…and remember the things I used to do to myself watching topless clips of her in movies…it’s funny how tits can be so manipulative….even when they are Mexican after I vowed to never get off to a Mexican whore cuz my mother was a Mexican whore and it just feels wrong…but I guess there are exceptions to every rule you make based on your damaged childhood….
Speaking of damaged, here are her tits and her 45 year old body, destroying many stereotypes of other 45 year old Mexican women, with 12 kids and the ability to make a bed faster than they can change a white kid they work for’s diaper….and they are substantial….
Salma Hayek is a good fertile Mexican designed to breed….She’s got fat milk filled tits, a fat ass, wide hips ready to drop a new baby every 9 months, and her nipples are like faucets ready to feed a small town and despite having lost her appeal since she’s old and washed up, she’s still got her moments and I guess here’s a glimpse of what was…..and who really cares…cuz as a Mexican she’s automatically a second rate citizen and seeing her ego and celebrity blind her of that, annoys me. She’s the kind of Mexican who forgets she is Mexican the kind of bitch who is trying to be white so hard that she has Mexican staff maintaining her house that she treats like second rate citizens…but I guess her mom tits have the ability to make me ignore that….
I just saw this video of Salma Hayek freaking the fuck out cuz of a snake and it made me laugh…I guess it opens a lot of opportunity to make penis jokes because her kid may lead you to think she isn’t actually scared of snakes…but I figure that’d be a lame angle…so maybe you should just watch the clip in slow motion cuz fear in women is pornographic…and probably something you’re used to cuz scaring a bitch is the only way to get her to agree to fuck you…whether it is from sneaking up on them, threatening them or worse…
Watch the video….
In case you forgot what Salma Hayek Looks Like…Here she is yesterday…in picture…scaring me…
