Her name is Teresa Palmer and I have no idea who she is, but assume she’s hit her big break starring with Adam Sandler in his new movie. I am not going to admit that I like Adam Sandler, because I don’t, his smile and stupid voices piss me off, but a lot of other people seem to think he’s worth wasting 2 hours of their life over, so I can only assume this is a good career move for her, not that she had the choice, because with roles like “Pool Party People” in Wolf Creek and some secondary role in The Grudge 2, which was a second rate movie, so it’s safe to say bitch has some credit card debt racked up while working towards the dream to pay off….She is from Australia, she’s in a bikini top and I just have to say it’s unfortunate she didn’t take the route of many other failed girls with a dream who ended up suckin’ dick on camera, because I’d like to see how she handles a cock.

That was a long fucking sentence ….Grammar Police where are you, because I think you need to arrest me for slaughtering the English language.

Last year when I was a senior in highschool, I had to get a Math tutor because I am pretty much a retard when it comes to anything with numbers . I was going to fail and have to come back next next and the school was pretty tired of catching me having sex in the bathrooms during class and drinking in the parking lot in the morning, so I don’t think they wanted me there longer anymore then I wanted to be. getting me a tutor and getting me out of there was in the best interests for all of us involved I’d say.

My tutor David was a virgin (something very familiar to 4 of the 5 of you reading this I’m sure) but was actually kind of cute, if you got passed the fact that he dressed in clothes his mother put out for him and had no social skills whatsoever. As time went on, I kind started to feel for the guy to be honest, and though talking to him about the situation probably would have been better, I just decided to pounce him and fuck him instead, so I did. He busted a load in about 5 seconds, and this was the one time it was okay. I don’t even think this kid has seen a tit before, seriously. David got laid, I got a B- in Math, and my teachers didn’t have to find me drunk and having sex in the school bathrooms anymore. We all came out winners.

That being said, I’m fully supportive of sleeping with tutors, teachers, co-workers and co-stars. And if I find out that Harry Potter didn’t get a chance to show Teresa Palmer his Magic Wand while filming their new movie, he is going to hear it from me.

hugs and kisses
Marie-Eve Martinez