Harry Potter always makes me feel uncomfortable because I know more adult men were into the series than little kids…and I know in watching the first show that those adult men were thinking about how excited they will be the day Emma Watson turns 18 so that their virgin loser sexual fantasies about wizard pussy doesn’t break any kiddie porn laws…..watching and waiting….movie release after ovie release….and many awkward discussions with their friends on their virgin loser geek message boards about when they can look at her and jerk off…and I’m pretty sure that time has come and gone, but here are some pics of her legs in a car, in a dress that you can’t look up, but I have faith in your computer skills and ability to do a 3D model of this to use for your special alone time…which is a lot more humilating than regular alone time, which is all the time. I just hope no virgin geeks were killed in the process of posting these pictures…I know how crazy legs can drive a motherfucker who has never fucked before…

Pics via Pac

Here are some pictures of Elle Macpherson that remind me of when I used to play “raid” with the hooker I used to “date”. I’d break into the shitty motel room in a cop costume, I’d pin her against the wall, I’d make her “spread em” and then I’d rape her, but it wasn’t really rape, because she was charging me and because my dick is so small it is hardly a weapon and even if I force myself on the bitch, it ends up a comical mess because they never knew dicks came that small and they get intrigued by how they don’t feel it inside them…but enough about me…there are pictures of Elle Macpherson from behind and despite being a mom and a retired model, she’s still got a place in my heart as being a woman I spent the summer of ’89 masturbating to.

Pics via Bauer

Sophie Monk is a waste of fucking space. I don’t really know what she does or what she is trying to do but I do know that the only thing good about her is how eager the bitch is when it comes to getting noticed…unfortunately not eager enough to release flash her tits, or pussy or even send me exclusive panty shots or release a sex tape yet…something I thought she’d come up with as her big PR push back when Paris Hilton stole her boyfriend, and something I hope she gets into before she gets too old or fat, because seeing her fuck is better than actually fucking her, thanks to her Paris Hilton strain of designer, expensive herpes, unless you are like me and every other guy I know, who either already have herpes or don’t mind getting herpes for 4 minutes of pleasure….

Either way, nice legs…

Pics via Fame

I love skinny girls….I spent a better part of yesterday stalking a girl…I don’t really like to call it stalking because that would imply I was creepy and criminal when really I was just admiring her because she was skinny and in the smallest tightest shorts I’ve ever seen on a girl. Her legs were long and luxurious and her tits were small and perky….so I did what any guy who had nothing better to do with his time and followed her home. It turns out her last name is “Roberts”…her buzzer code is 1093…she must live alone or she’s just anorexic…cuz she went grocery shopping and bought 1 apple, a case of diet coke and a pound of roast turkey slices, which would explain why she’s so skinny…at 11 pm she left her house and got into a cab that I tried to follow but lost her outside one of those trendy supper club bullshits….and I went home to my pig wife who was eating ice cream and crying about some bullshit I tried to ignore…because I was too busy realizing that life fucking hates me and I’m real bad at it cuz otherwise I’d be bossing Kate Bosworth to bounce her boney ass on my pelvis instead of being afraid my wife is going to get frisky and smother me to death with hers….

Pics via Fame

Rihanna bores the fuck out of me. She was this one hit wonder who managed to make more than one hit with variations of the same fucking song and the public bought into the shit and made her and her handlers a lot of money when really there was nothing special about her. I know everyday girls who look better and sing better than this bitch, they are just missing the millions of dollars of marketing budget, the famous co-signs and a bullshit poor talented girl found in the Islands story that the media eats the fuck up…

I’m ready for her to fade the fuck away like she would have if we were in a different generation, where digitally altering her voice to make her sound like she can sing didn’t exist, but apparently she’s out in a new music video showing off her thick legs that should be washing bed sheets at a Barbado resort…

Pics via Bauer

Here is the next Lohan doin’ Lohan’s game better than Lohan. She started out in Mean Girls and instead of showing her pussy on her way to clubs like some shitty quality Jersey person, she was showing her vagina on HBO shows, in movies with sex scenes and that didn’t stop Hollywood from casting her in shitty, generic, Justin Bieber type movies for teenage retard girls who have no idea what’s up…not that you care….I am just telling you cuz I want to see more of her naked…I want to know her vagina inside out so that I can sculpt the shit, paint the shit, sketch the shit and model the shit out of plasticine….I want to know what she smells like…so that I can recreate the smell by stealing dirty panties from the laundromat,I want to know how she maintains her pubic hair..so that I can trim my own pubic hair and glue in in place. I want to know the little things she does when she fucks, so that I can visualize it, and the little things she does when she shits out my semen from deep inside her….or maybe just a few better pictures than this, but legs are good enough for me….for now…

Pics via Fame

I know Pink wearing a dress is probably nothing exciting to you, but in my quest to find out if Pink’s got a dick or just looks like she does it is a big deal….

See her hair is short, she’s drinking a beer, her legs are thick all signs of being a fucking dude but she’s in a dress and heels and a dress and heels is one step closer to making me think she’s probably a girl who just looks like she has a cock and not a man who pretends to be a girl…but then again I did have this neighbor who died a few years ago and when we snuck into his apartment to steal his shit, he had a closet full of women’s clothes, and dude was never married, but he did have a lot of dainty men walk in and out of his place multiple times a day, every day, not to mention the landlord also found him dead wearing nylons and heels…..making me think that maybe this dress proves nothing….

The real scary thing in all this is that I have met straight men who have told me they find this girl hot…something they may want to take to their therapist to help determine the root of all their problems is the fact they are in the fucking closet….

So this post proves nothing and is just a waste of fucking time, something I like to think I’ve got good at the last 6 years of this shit…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

The funny thing about Jennifer Aniston is that she’s not that ugly for a 40 year old, but she just can’t land a husband, or someone willing to knock her up and that makes me laugh. She’s a typical cunt who thinks she’s got so much going on that she’s too good for the average dude who is into her. So she runs after these Brad Pitt replacements that constantly reject her because with bitches with high standards, comes high maintenance and when you’re just fucking her because you’ve wanted to since you saw her on friends, you realize that it’s not worth the fucking headaches, so bitch ends up alone cuz even with all the rejection, she still thinks she’s too good to get with dudes who would actually put up with her bullshit….The good news is that there will always be cats to keep her company and fill her big empty house when she stops getting work and is forced to face her demons with no distractions a few years down the road. That’s when she’ll be good for moving in on, like the old maids in my neighborhood who couldn’t have kids cuz they had their uterus removed thanks to cancer caused by their careers as prostitutes, a career that made marriage a fantasy….

Pics via Fame

I am sure we can all agree on one thing, when it comes to fucking there’s no such thing as a perfect girl. The fact that we’re fucking her, just makes her good enough. So whether she’s got a nice face and shitty ass, or a nice body by shitty tits, or a perfect body by a shitty feet, or if she’s missing limbs, her pussy smells, she has a shit eating fetish where you’re the one who has to do the shit eating, she’s really cool but is Mexican, there’s not one person out there that is 100 percent dead on perfection…sure there’s some that are a hell of a lot better than others, but I can always find a serious flaw in everyone and unfortunately for Whitney Port, her flaw is her whole fucking face and the only solution to such a fucked up grill is to Ninja herself like an Arab about to blow up a pre-school…These pictures are to express my excitement that the end is near for these fucking jokes…..finally….not to express my excitement about her…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Jay-Z goes to be at night knowing that he is Jay-Z, one of the biggest and most successful people in rap music, but yet he still wakes up next to Beyonce, a bitch he must have married on a whim, cuz he thought she was this talented, super famous black chick who wasn’t using him for his money, before realizing he was involved with a cunt princess diva who can’t wipe her own ass, when he could have just ended up with a groupie bitch who was far hotter, far more loyal, and willing to do anything and everything he wants her too, because no only is she hooked on him, but also hooked onto the lifestyle he provides and won’t fuck that up for anything. He’d have a hell of a lot less headaches….but since I don’t trust anything in entertainment, I can only assume their relationship is strictly for PR. Hollywood is all lies…..

But what isn’t a lie, is that I hate Beyonce. She looks like a cunt and she has a cunt I am not into wanting to fuck and seeing her in her little shorts reminds me of how she’s got nothing hot about her…probably the same reason all her fans are girls or homos….

Pics via Bauer

I have never been turned on by Ashlee Simpson. The only good thing about her was that that she was the ugly sister and ugly sisters try harder to make you cum than the hotter sister or even the average girl because they’ve got a complex and spent their lives feeling second rate and second rate always picks up the slack for being the ugly sister by servicing men better if they aren’t the kind of second rate that kills themselves cuz they can’t deal with being second rate…..I figured the only guys she’d get would be no names trying to get close to Jessica Simpson, but she proved me wrong by marrying and getting knocked up by some homosexual possibly because Jessica Simpson turned fat and battered looking, making the calls to Ashlee Simpson totally die down…or maybe she just wanted a guy she could share her clothes with…and I guess none of that matters and what does matter is that she knows to show off her thin legs, to distract us from her face and to find female escort that is even uglier than her to make her look less ugly….and that effort shouldn’t go unnoticed….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

The producers of this new Cameron Diaz movie have the right idea. Not only have they cast Justin Timerblake, her ex boyfriend, as her new love interest for publicity. Something that I am sure Jessica Biel would be upset about if Hollywood wasn’t filled with bullshit publicist co-ordinated relationships for these insecure, self-conscious whores, but more importantly if Jessica Biel didn’t have a cock…knowing that there was know way homosexual Timberlake would go back to pretending to be Cameron Diaz’s boyfriend, now that he’s got a bitch who makes him feel like the bitch he is, without the world knowing how gay the shit actually is….but they also dress her proper, which is what matters here, since upset jealous girlfriends isn’t really what I do here, but checking out exposed body is….

So here she is Cameron Diaz showing off her amazing legs in this amazing outfit and that’s a good thing no matter how close to 40 this bitch is.

Pics via Fame

There’s just something about Sophie Monk that I can’t get enough of. Sure she’s a useless whore who can’t get work who latches on anything she can to get noticed..

Her meal ticket cheated on her with Paris Hilton a long time ago, and I’m pretty sure that left her with herpes and since then she was just filler who walks around Hollywood and people take pictures of when they don’t have better people to take pictures of…

She has tried really hard to become famous from nude scenes, to scandals, to staged bikini pictures, but for some reason nothing ever sticks, except maybe her herpes, since that shit is for life…but that’s more reason to like her…she’s hungry and she looks good and is the exact person I would pretend I was a producer to get in her pants…and it would work…even though I look homeless and smell like piss…..

Pics via Bauer

All girls have cellulite, even skinny girls have cellulite, it’s got something to do with their uterus and the way it makes babies, hell, I probably have cellulite…you know it happens when you’re fat as fuck, even when you’re a dude…so cellulite is really not a big deal or something to point out and laugh at, but for some reason, when it’s on Mischa Barton, who is already at the end of her fucking road and a sloppy mess who always had sloppy fucking legs, I find it pretty entertaining….it’s like bitch doesn’t give a fuck and still wears shorts and I’m not sure if that’s a sign of her not giving a fuck about what others thinkand embracing herself, of it it’s a sign of her just not giving a fuck cuz she’s given the fuck up…

I never found her hot, it was all downhill from the kid puking on herself in the Sixth Sense, but maybe you did, so here are some pics to remind you that you shouldn’t….

Pics via PacificCoastNews