So this is some model named Jessica Stam who is supposed to be pretty popular now so I decided to try to find her on Facebook since seducing “it” girls on the internet is what I do, except for the seducing part because they usually just block and delete me. I tell them how I want to give them abortions and other retarded shit that doesn’t translate into funny online, kinda like this site.

Either way, I came across these pictures and realized that she may be a hot model in pictures and on the runway, but she’s not a hot girl at events and in candid pictures and figured I’d post them for you all to see and hopefully to get back to her because let’s face it, she’s better than anything I’ve fucked. So her crack addict bags under her eyes and her mustache aren’t really that big of a deal to me. The addicts I’ve fucked didn’t even have both their eyes, and it’s just nice to see that she makes enough money for me to wallet fuck her with my limp dick in hopes of K-Feding her to support my retirement plan, but then again the dude who just gave me a coffee a Starbucks makes enough money to support my retirement. I’m not very luxurious, despite popular belief.