This may be Goldie Hawn’s nipple. I couldn’t really make it out because staring at Goldie Hawn’s tit for too long, makes me wet and hungry for old pussy, because I have a feeling shit smells like mothballs, tastes like burnt meat, has the same texture as a rotting catalope wrapped in an old muddy boot and it’s fucking porn to me.

I posted these pictures of my least favorite clown yesterday, but it turns out there are a ton fuckin’ more and I figured since deflated fat chick tits are all you know, you’ll appreciate this shit. Unfortunately, I don’t. This shit just annoys me. It’s theatrical, attention craving, obnoxious and the one thing I can hope after seeing these is that bitch gets eaten up by the fame she doesn’t deserve because she’s ugly and dies of a fucking drug overdose as soon as fucking possible please.

Lady Gaga went to some medical center, I assume to deal with her Aids, you know since she is a gay man and Aids is the gay disease, or at least started out as the gay disease, before Africa took that shit away from them, because I guess no one wants to give the gay’s anything of their own and that’s why they come together and throw fucking parades and shit….

She showed up in a see-through shirt, with her nipples taped, like some kind of obscure hipster, carrying a tea cup, because since she’s made it, she insists on doing her urine samples in high end china, while wearing a wig and glasses, and all that production still couldn’t distract me from her weak chin, disgusting face. Good try though.

Lindsay Lohan may be crazy, I don’t know her so I couldn’t really tell you what the fuck she’s into, but I do know that she’s driving around a porn producers expensive car, she’s reportedly broke and out of work, she’s pretty much admitted to being a sex addict, you know to fill the void she feels from being an empty person with no father, she’s into eating pussy, which makes porn scenes all the more interesting.

Actually, it makes life all the more interesting and if you land a girl who is into girls and interested in eating pussy and actually means it, you have got to work that angle fast, because before you know it, she’ll be off doing it with other guys and girls and all that groundwork you laid into gettin her to accept it as a possibility gets thrown the fuck out of the window and into some other asshole’s bed, before you get your taste. It’s like you spend all your time on someone, and they take that shit to share with the guy next door, before you get the chance to really appreciate what you created.

I used to bang a friend of mine’s girlfriend. When he first got with her, before I got with her, he’d complain about how bad she was in bed, how she wouldn’t let him cum in her, how she was fuckin’ standard and so he spent a solid 6 months training her to be the little slut he wanted and when he finally got her to a good place, she moved in on me because she was all sexually confident with her new found skills and he was out of town, so I got this well practiced pussy and I think it was the only time I ever came from a blowjob, it was fantastic, especially since I didn’t have to go through all the hard work, unfortunately, the aftermath when my friend found out, wasn’t quite as pleasant….

Here’s the video….

Kate Moss is still getting work even though she’s old and a drug addict. Here she is doing a photoshoot as the face of Yves Saint Laurent. I like that despite being a cokehead she can still get hired, you know because I guess everyone’s a fucking cokehead in the fashion world so if routine drug tests were implemented, they’d have no one to work, which is unfair, because when I was applying for work as a flight attendent to escape this hell I am living, they asked me to leave the casting call, because I did a bump in front of a recruiter in the bathroom and they didn’t think me telling them that it gives me a little more edge, confidence and alertness to get the job well done was a good enough reason….in fact I think they even called the cops.

I guess like anything we have to wonder what example this will give girls, you know since any girl aware of who the face of Yves Saint Laurent is, usually is a brat with a ton of fucking money who started getting high at 14 cuz daddy was at work and her allowance was 1000 dollars a day….It doesn’t matter – just look at her nipple, live her nipple and love her nipple.

You know it takes a certian guy to marry Gisele. You know, the kind of guy who lost his viriginity to his college football team during some kind of initiation, the kind of guy who can’t shower without met to feel really clean, you know a jock who likes his cock surrounded and compared to other cock because it brings him and his bros closer together.

Here is the happy couple in Brazil…you know…introducing Brady to real live chicks with dicks…not just chicks who look like they have dicks who he married, something the boys back home will never believe exist…you know “it’s like what you guys do to me in the shower after we win or lose or finish practice – only its got tits and HIV”….

Pamela Anderson was using her celebrity for Vivienne Westwood’s fashion show as one of the models. Sure, Pam Anderson’s got no real business being a model since she’s old, thick and washed the fuck up, but Vivienne Westwood launched her career making clothes for the Sex Pistols, who like Pam Anderson, were their fair share battered, so maybe this is just some kind of tribute.

I am happy she brought out her big fake tits, and her nipple that looks like it’s hanging on for its fucking life after being removed and reapplied on so many fucking times throughout its life, that it doesn’t look like it used to, maybe because of the scaring or lack of blood supply or possibly because its not actually her nipple anymore but some kind of suction-cup prostethic she’s taped the fuck on and none of that matters, because I’d rather see Pam Anderson’s shitty tits on the runway, than some skinny, awkward, tall, freakish 14 year old immigrant monster and here are the pics.

I was wondering when Paris Hilton would try to make herself relevant by getting naked again. It’s been a solid bunch of months of her keeping her shit in lockdown like she used to have to do when she got a herpes outbreak, before not giving a fuck about passing that shit around, but now she’s slowly getting into her old ways and by old I mean actually old, she’s 28 and this shit’s just gonna start lookin’ pathetic after a while, oh wait, it already does.

My main issue with Paris is trying to figure out who the fuck told her she was hot, sexy, or whatever the fuck they told her to make her act this way. She looks like a bird and girls like her are the type who slip the cool guys their numbers at the bar, but leave alone or with some bottom feeding fat guy, only to get booty called by the cool guy if he doesn’t land anything better, all while acting like god’s gift to the fucking world, when clearly they are shit.

But what I think doesn’t matter, I just want to see real tits, I’ve had enough of this computer see through shit. Maybe I’ll get off my ass soon.

So Nicole Scherzinger from the Pussycat Dolls let her big brown nipple out for some air because I guess it was suffocating under her dress, or maybe because the shit stain is so fucking big it’s almost impossible to keep it covered up and letting the world see it is a small trade off for the cleavage that sells her records….I am not one of those people who hates on brown nipples or even brown vaginas, I only find that shit disgusting on white chicks, because you gotta do some serious damage to get a brown pussy, like using a log of frozen dog feces as a dildo or someshit.

Either way, this Scherzinger whore’s good to go, unfortunately it’s not as funny as a massive clit slip, but I’d settle for massive nipple slip, because ultimately, I don’t care and I’m just posting this for you.

Here’s the video of the performance last week….

Girls are my thing, not because they give me the time of day, but because I can look at them in bikinis and imagine the things I would do to them. If you’re on my facebook, you know that just because I think like a rapist, doesn’t mean I am a rapist.

Speaking of rape, this girl dated Brandon Davis, and despite assuming that piece of rich trash is only capable of getting pussy through rape, he seems to find dumb enough status whores trying to climb the ladder from other countries who assume he’s a bigger deal than he is and and sacrifice their vaginas to the cause to advance their career.

But the good news for any girl he gets with is that they don’t actually have to get turned on for him, because we all know that’s virtually impossible because he is repulsive. His dick is self-lubricating like his hair making him capable of entering even the driest pussy without them realizing it, I am talking desert sand try pussy in any position, this sneaky motherfucker can pull off.

Here are a whole lot of pictures of her tits and hot body in a bikini.

If you’re wondering why I haven’t posted, which you’re not. It’s because I am at the Obama Inauguration and it’s hard to find an internet cafe. I was personally approached by his people to cover the event on this site because we are a reputable news source for a solid dozen people. In case you were wondering, I wasn’t at the Obama Inauguration, I was sleeping. I figure all Americans would be watching this shit so why bother trying to compete. Obama is the biggest thing since the real Jesus and I figure I’ll let him have his time. I am over this whole Obama fad. It bores me. It is repetitive. I get it he brings you all hope and following him is like a fucking cult, but the dude is pretty positive, he does bring hope to all you suffering motherfuckers, but I’d rather see the miracles he talks about that hear him talk about them. Sure he’s been president for a solid 15 minutes now, but this classy, respectful motherfucker who even hugged George Bush, who I feel bad for, dude got a pretty shitty deal the people booed him despite having voted for him, hypocrites, maybe they should be booing their motherfucking selves. Anyway, this Obama motherfucker best get to work. First job should be to arrest that poet that came up after him to clear the fuckin’ room.

Speaking of getting to work, here’s Marisa Miller doing the whole Victoria’s Secret photoshoot thing, gettin’ paid motherfuckers.

Here are some more Marisa Miller bikini pictures….because you like her….

Some fake Annalynne McCord added me to facebook today. I tried to get to talking to her, but she just ignored me. So if the fake Annalynne is that much of a cunt, I can’t only assume the real one is even more of a cunt. You know, the kind of girl who thought she was pretty in highschool, but no one else did because of her lanky little body and big stupid hair, , but she showed all of us. She made it in Hollywood, if you consider a gig on Nip/Tuck and 90210 really making it, which I don’t. But at least she is skinny. Sure she’s got a clown face, small ass and small tits that remind me of a childhood dream I once had, of me in an open field with a herd of wild horses running my way, a trickling brook to my left and the sun shining down on me all while fucking my childhood best friend, who was a guy. It caused some issues I would have brought up in therapy, but could never afford that bullshit.

Either way, here she is in a bikini with her tit poppin’ out, that’s what happens when bras or bikinis in your size don’t exist, because you’re chest classifies you as a dude….if you know what I mean….which you do since it happens to you every time you put a condom on….

Bonus – Here she is simulating a blowjob