Christina Ricci looks like a cartoon character and I guess there’s nothing really wrong with that because we all grew up watching cartoons and it’s only natural that as we get older, and our bodies start changing, we turn that love for our favorite cartoons into something sexual. I guess that’s why all you weirdos get off to anime or cartoon erotica, which is something I will never understand but maybe it’s got something to do with having not being allowed to watch TV growing up, so I never got that same kinda passion for the shit that you do.

Either way, I was surfing the internet and came across an obituary to her tits, something that makes sense because she killed the fuckers for some stupid reason like trying to make herself look skinny, because let’s face it they weren’t even that big but anorexics are all confused when it comes to their body image. Here it is.

Christina Ricci’s Breasts
Murdered June 2, 2004

It comes with great sadness in our hearts to bring you the news of the death of Christina Ricci’s tits. There was nothing explicitly wrong with them, but due to vanity their life was prematurely ended. They will never have the chance to breast feed or sag and will always remembered by their role in such classic films as Opposite of Sex, Buffalo 66 and Pecker. Survived by a nation of perverts who are trying to get their hands on the breast tissue the doctors removed from her to staple on their wall next to their printed out and magazine cutout collection of Christina Ricci’s breasts.

They have brought so much love to our hearts and joy to our lives.

Memorial Donations may be made to Breast Cancer Research for women who want their breasts but have them rudely taken away and not because of the luxury of plastic surgery and vanity, but because of potentially fatal disease.

Here she is in a green dress.