Beyonce was trying to be playful and cute, like that hooker I once hired who wouldn’t stop baby talking me, when all I wanted was a fucking back alley blowjob from a whore, but instead had to deal with this cutesy shit that couldn’t make me cum and her soiled panties were straight out of the Children’s section with cartoon characters on the shit, and when I asked her wear she got them, she told me from her daughter, and the whole thing was not hot, cuz I need a whore to get me off, not a bitch in a fucking comfy PJs, or flannel pants, or little girl underwear, so while Beyonce may as well be sucking her thumb in this outfit as she greets the day and the paparazzi, I’d rather see her in crotchless panties and a dildo she just used on Jay-Z in hand…but maybe you have different taste than me.

Pics via Bauer

I saw an interview with Kate Hudson earlier today that I can’t find where she said something like “I could only wear those in my period movies” and I thought to mysel that she must have a decent inheritance lined up for her, she must get decent child support, she must have lived the good life and she will never go poor, so why the fuck did she star in period movies, that seems like gutter porn / fetish videos that street whore caliber women would do and not some silver spoon celebrity’s daughter and then I realized she did period movies for menstrual fetishists because she needed to break from her mom’s shadow…she needed her own legacy and art….she couldn’t just stick to the hollywood avenue that her family and all their friends took because it would be too easy…then I got to thinking what do people wear in period movies….do they wear white coton cuz shit absorbs the period, or is it more about seeing the blood for the people who like their women to be fertile….and the whole menstration as a turn on just didn’t make sense to me….but I can assume they probably don’t wear leopard print silk pajamas…but maybe they do….

Pics via Fame

Jennifer Love Hewitt seems to think taking out the trash is the fucking set of Can’t Hardly Wait or whatever that 90s movie she was rockin’ her big tits and small body in.

She decided to wear her pajama pants like the slob that she’s become, but snuck in this belly top like she was a trashy local Britney Spears slut at some wet t-shirt contest in the late 90s, only she’s not hot and willing to suck anyone’s dick since she’s not young and having a good time, but instead, old, single and taking out the fucking trash because she doesn’t have a fucking man to do it for her….

I don’t know why I am bothering posting it, but that’s a common theme in my life so I am going to do it anyway.

Lauren Conrad is the lazy kind of rich girl who sits around in a pair of pajama pants laying in front of the couch all day, ordering her servants to serve on her, until realizing that she really needs a coffee or to run an errand like getting a pussy wax or something her servant can’t do for her and she doesn’t bother putting on a normal pair of pants because everyday is fucking summer camp for her and the world is her fuckin’ bedroom, we’re just all visitors in it.

Nothing turns me off more than a girl in a pair of pajama pants like this, other than men in a pair of pajama pants like this. The reason I hate them is because I know the bitch is not going to fuck me or is on her period or some shit every time she crawls into bed rockin’ a pair of these. It means no pussy for me because even if i want to feel romantic and try to put her in the mood by shoving my boner between her ass cheeks and start try humpin’ her as she sleeps, I feel like I’m trying to get it on with an 8 year old, because they are the only fuckers who have any business wearing this kind of thing to bed, and even they have the decency to get fuckin’ dressed before leaving their house….

I guess in an ideal world any girl who sleeps in the same bed as me will be nude or in something that leaves her vagina exposed because that way I have easy access to finger bang or squeeze my dick in them while they sleep, it’s pretty much the only sex I could ever get without drugs or money….unfortunately, it’s not an ideal world and my wife is a fucking beast who fortunately smells too bad to sleep with naked, so I try to wrap her clothed body up in one of those plastic sheets you have to prevent pissing through the mattress because she’s the last bitch I’d want to midnight molest.