Sure Celine Dion’s got a bad face, her songs get under your skin and her accent makes you want to jump her in a back alley, throw her in a van and drive her deep into the wilderness, tie her to a tree, pour honey on her and hope the bears get her, but I find her hot.

The reason is not because her body is pretty tight for an old mom, it’s not even because she’s french and french girls like anal on the first date and treat sex casually like it’s supposed to be treated. It is because at 14, she realized that her vagina was her meal ticket and without it she’d just be an old french fry eating hag in small town Quebec singing at a Church choir, so she seduced her married older neighbor, probably by walking around in a bikini, showing up to his Christmas parties and torturing him by sliding her foot up his thigh under the table, until he went so fucking crazy for her little pussy that he mortgaged his house, left his family, paid off her parents, rented studio time, toured locally, making her the ridiculously famous and successful icon who he married, and who is devoted to him and who will never cheat on or report to the authorities, because they are a team and it was all because she knew how to work her her teenage pussy.

Sure that whole sex with a 14 year old is common in Quebec and it is legal so her story may not be a big deal here, but it is good enough that seeing her panties, knowing she’s only had one dick in her, and knowing her past as a teenage slut makes this bitch a whole lot fuckin’ hotter than her face lets on.