So it turns out that Mariah Carey throws like a fag, but I guess that’s okay considering she’s one of those singing Diva bitches who is ridiculously high maintenance and as superficial, pretentious and obnoxious as a drag queen pretending to be a diva by overcompensating because it has a penis, so it’s kind of expected. What isn’t expected is that she didn’t make outrageous demands like to be carried onto the field by 15 men dressed like sailors where she is handed a diamond encrusted ball on a velvet pillow and solid pink gold baseball mitt before making her pitch in an evening gown. The only thing representative of her Diva high maintenance cunt ways are the heels, I guess marrying that dude’s really made her down to earth. and by down to earth I mean not throwing a tantrum because she got some dirt on her toes, which is a big step for this bitch as she lets down her black ancestors for not being athletic like the rest of them.

Mariah Carey is in Japan because that’s the only country that is crazy enough to care about her and they got her to throw some pitch at some baseball game. She was classy enough to show up in her Mariah track jacket and workout shorts while wearing her high heels because they are the only thing that makes her fat legs look thin. I guess the joke that is Mariah Care continues but on an international scale and I guess it doesn’t matter because I wouldn’t mind her and her weak chin throwing anything down for me, preferably my pants, because I have a useless set of balls I wouldn’t mind her singing to.