Everyone knows jet skiing with a dude riding tandem makes you gay, especially when he grabs your ass as you get off your jet ski, you know while the paparazzi watches probably hoping to either start rumors as jokes, cuz when you’re famous, all the paparazzi and tabloid stories gives them something to laugh at when sitting on their piles sof money, or maybe cuz Russell Brand’s boyfriend is trying to get the attention he deserves, cuz he’s tired of being on the backburner, like some kind of mistress who gets pregnant on purpose demanding you leave your wife for her, when the fun in having a mistress becomes a stressful job…instead of a stress relief….all over the bitches face….
All I gotta say, is if you were married to Katy Perry for business, you’d go faggot too, especially when you were one in the first place…can’t hide behind those tight pants, long hair and poofter accent for ever….
I know it’s pretty fucking obvious and maybe even boring to say that Russell Brand is a queer, because everyone already knows he is and not because he wears tight pants, or because he makes out with his male costars every chance her gets, or even because of his weird dainty accent and way he speaks, but because he’s engaged to Katy Perry, a disgusting pig of a woman I know that anyone hetero wouldn’t get down with unless they were black, but that a queer would pretend to the public that he is getting down with her, because it makes the most sense for both their careers….I know that Russell Brand pretended to be a drug addict and wrote a fake book and lived his lie that led him to North America, so pullin’ stunts like pretending is easy for him….but I guess as long as he gets trash half naked in their bikinis, he’s the kind of homo I don’t mind getting behind….but as soon the bikini-clad bitches disappear…I got no choice but to go back hating on this useless unfunny motherfucker……and I guess the post of this post is to say I dig cheap marketing strategies…cuz bitches in bikinis always get my attention….good job you fucking geniuses.
I don’t really like Russell Brand at all. The only redeeming quality he had was the minor possibility that he was HIV positive from when he used to share needles doing heroin in the UK. I feel like I’ve mentioned this 100 times before, because I have….
Unfortunately for us, he bullshitted that whole heroin story when he was creating this persona that is clearly as authentic as his heterosexuality. This out of the box, cookie cutter act is just a fucking act and the whole half-homo, sexually ambigious “drug addiction” bullshit just solidified his failed rocker act.
Either way, here he is changing the world in his work, but simulating pissing on someone’s face while probably getting paid millions of dollars and anyone who says this bullshit takes talent is a fucking asshole who needs to be taken outback and shot. Seriously….look at these pictures and try your hardest to have any level of respect for this waste of fucking space “Funnyman”…..who is really just an annoying tight clothes wearing queer….
Hollywood fucking sucks. The scam is on us…We are the real fucking idiots for allowing these people to have careers…
I guess having a man who actually wants to fuck her who isn’t black is exciting Katy Perry and boosting her confidence, because black guys will fuck any white chick, no matter how doughy or disgusting she may be, because the fact that she’s white totally conquers all her shortcomings, is getting to Katy Perry’s head. It’s like now that someone who could very well be a homosexual but may suck it up and fuck her like she was the man he wishes she was, because she’s out wearing thigh high pantyhose and sheer dresses and pretty much being as seductive as a girl of her stature can be without shit being overly comical, since she’s disgusting looking. It’s one of those hormonal things that makes a bitch go crazy after long stints of not fucking stop and long stints of fucking start and the only thing that would make these pictures hotter would be if they were of this lovely couple trapped in a blazing fire, or if their plane was crashing into the ocean, or if they were both walking around with their HIV positive results because really, they do no good for society and are just stains of shit you leave behind on the toilet seat to fuck with the next guy you know will have to use it, and some people are just better off disappearing than annoying me in picture, not that I wish death upon people, it just seems like the only way for Katy Perry to really do something right….
This is a horrible way to wake up, the only salvation we have is that Russell Brand’s heroin addiction was actual fact and not just a bullshit book he wrote as an “autobiography” from his parent’s basement that lead to his MTV career and that lead to his Hollywood career, and that he shared needles, is too scared to get tested for AIDS and has infected this Katy Perry dog so they both live sick and miserable lives with no energy to perform ever again.
The only thing that makes sense in all this is that I thought brand was a full poofter and that his sex jokes were all just the same bullshit that landed him his career, when really he wanted to rim Seth Rogan with his cock head or some shit, so that would explain why he’s so smitten with Katy Perry, because he doesn’t realize she is the ugly pig that she is, he just knows pretending to kiss her is good for his career…..and the whole thing is pretty fucking sick.
Russell Brand is kind of a funny dude. I have seen him in stand-up years ago and he was a lot more interesting to listen to than the other people on the bill like Judd Apatow, Seth Rogan and that weird Asian chick who fucks the dude in Juno.
Sure his shit is tired, his jokes repetitive, he’s softer and candy coated and even annoying, but I am sure he could land some seriously hot pussy, but instead he’s fucking Katy Perry. Sure, he’s kinda gay and gay dudes pretending to be straight don’t traditionally fuck the hottest girls, you know as they prefer the kind who look like they have dicks, and in his defense he is from the UK where most girls are as ugly as Katy Perry, but I guess we can always hope that this known heroin addict, or at least dude who claims he was a heroin addict has HIV from sharing needles he hasn’t told anyone about and does us all a favor by infectin’ this bitch….cuz then she’ll be too sick to make another horrible record to destroy my life with. Good goin’ Russell! Someone get him the Nobel Peace Prize.
Russell Brand is milking this fame shit by always rockin’ out with random groupies. These two girls I guess he was fucking in tandem, because that’s the power fame gives you, ran outside hiding under black robes to get something out of their car, because I am sure Brand has had his way with them from all fuckin’ angles.
I don’t have anything to really say about this, because who really cares. Girls are whores. Girls like famous dudes and why wouldn’t they. He’s got money, he’s not lookin’ for a wife, but they probably like giving him everything he wants in hopes that one day he’ll choose them and let them into his little world.
Who cares. Seriously. Why did I bother downloading these fucking pictures. Cropping them. Uploading them. When there’s nothing hot about them except whatever my imagination had lined up for them, but even that’s hard to pull off because all I see are their thick ankles, like we’re in some muslim country reporting the news in blackface….you like how I just tied that into an earlier post. Admit it was clever.
I always write about girls in see through tops, I figure why not switch it up a bit, you know and show off Russell Brand wearing whatever the fuck he’s wearing, but definitely shouldn’t be wearing, but assume it’s part of his long hair, sexually ambiguous, wordy bullshit comedy act that is kind of irritating as shit, and kind of funmy at the same time, because this skinny motherfucker could double as a woman if you got him in the right position and I know you like that. Gaylord.
Comedian/Actor/Writer Russell Brand was seen kissing up with another groupie, a day after pictures of him in his underwear with some Asian hit. The reason he’s out hustling girls…because he can. Dude is a hot commodity internationally, and he’s gonna milk that as much as he can, and convince pussy everywhere they have a chance, while planning the next pussy to hit, until eventually, getting caught and locked the fuck down, married, have kids and end up doing it all over again, before getting caught and divorced only to do it all over again. I guess that is the empty cycle that is his life, I mean he’ll never find a soul mate because he’s always gonna be looking for fresher pussy, to share his love with the world, and as a man who has found his soulmate that’s a real tragedy, and by soulmate, I mean fat bitch who doesn’t turn me on, but covers my basic needs, and who has no self respect and lets me go out and do whatever the fuck I want only to come home and describe every single pussy I saw that wasnt hers. It’s pretty amazing.
All women like famous dick, so when I reached out to Russell Brand to ask him to comment on how much this asian girl who looks like she’d give a solid massage that ends with her tongue in your ass costs and he didn’t bother answering.
I knew it was because she was free. Girls have this trigger that goes off in their vaginas that if a guy is on TV, Movies, Stage, he is more important than the guy who isn’t, so they groupie themselves up and end up back at their hotel room, only to be violated from every which way, maybe thinking that it is validating to have famous cock, like it means they got through and were good enough amongst all the other chicks, or maybe it’s because they dream of a better life with the famous cock, you know designer fucking bags and shit. What they don’t realize is that the famous cock is only lookin for a good time, and has slutty girls all over the world willing to jump on their dicks. They know that girls are sluts, never respect them, never commit to them, never really do anything for them, other than the occassional text message or myspace message or facebook message to keep the fuckin’ door open because they’ve already got the girl to whore out for them once, might as well make it a routine, since the only reason the girl is with them is for their status/money, why not use them back the next time they roll into town.
These famous cocks are living the life in some people’s eyes, you know different pussy every fucking night, but it all seems like way too much fuckin’ work to me even if it comes easy…
Nice panties Russell and I bet this is a pretty shitty way for the dude who’s dating this girl in yellow to find out why she wasn’t answering his calls last night….sucker.
I told you last week that girls were going to start dressing like this, because I am a trendsetter ahead of my time, and because people don’t have an original bone in their fucking body and like to do what they see on TV because they take it as that stamp of approval they need to do things, without TV telling them what to do, they’d be fucking lost and unable to do anything from shitting, to choosing a drink, to what car they drive. Thanks America.
That said, here are some pictures of Russel Brand leaving a club with a couple of Lady Gagas and it’s safe to say that I haven’t got shit on this guy. The last person I left a club with was one of Lindsay Lohan’s security guards, and despite him potentially lookin’ hot in some spanx space outfit, he wasn’t really my type.
I guess you get all the no name pussy when you are actually considered funny, when you have your own radio show, when you star in some movies and host some MTV award shows, but in all fairness to groupie whores, they would have probably still left with him if he told them he was in the Best Buy catalog.
To See the Rest of the Pictures From Behind Follow This Link Cuz The Paparazzi Hate Me… GO
