Virgins Losers love this bitch because she is what they modeled the girl in Avatar after, and Avatar porn clips are all the fuckin’ rage in the virgin loser circuit, as virgin losers may hate “cheating” on their previous love interests and sexual fantasies they’re loyal to, like Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Xena the Warrior Princess, their love for technology just can’t pass up on new masturbation trends…….

I feel that once a virgin loser leaves the safety of his mother’s basement or computer filled apartment after years of therapy, some medication and a new outlook on life that realizes he will either kill himself or break the miserable pattern his social awkwardness and obsessive compulsiveness has created for him, hoping to make his way through life as close to a normal person as possible by divorcing his internet wife he met on an RPG game and trying to not talk about bullshit that only he and 3 other guys online find interesting, only to realize that real life is hard, since real woman walk around it, making everything so fuckin’ distracting, because everything leads to an erection….especially when all your fantasies come true and the actress who played your most recent alien crush is getting patted down in airport security in a pair of tight jeans that show off her flat ass the virgins don’t find flat because it’s ass and it’s connected to the bitch from Avatar….making them realize this whole living in the normal world is not going to work for them, it’s too much of a sensory overload, that is just way too much to handle….limiting their excursions to seeing Sci-fi movies in 3D for the 14th time…and going to the computer store to buy parts for the spaceship they are building in the garage.

I didn’t re-read this because I find editing too self-absorbed but I hope it makes sense…..otherwise it was a huge waste of time and by huge I mean 5 minutes of time which is huge if you only have 6 minutes to live. True story.

Pics via Bauer