So the Hills had some Season Finale party that I am sure a lot of people are hoping is the series finale party, because we’ve finally caught onto their scam that their reality isn’t really reality at all and Audrina showed up, trying to be the fucking comedian of the night, by bring this “man pillow” I’ve seen advertised on the internet from Japan to make lonely girls feel like they are being cuddled at night, as her date. I can only assume this ties into the show somehow, like Audrina’s been looped into some relationship scandal and since she’s not clever to come up with something like this on her own, the good people at MTV wrote it into the “going to the season finale party” script and none of it really matters because it doesn’t make me laugh.

If anything it depresses me and makes me think of all those guys out there who can’t get pussy and are saving up for a Real Doll but can only afford the torso, turning them into weirdo’s who can’t get off to actual girls with heads and limbs and takes them down a very dark path because the 1500 dollar torso is way more affordable than the 6000 dollar full body doll.

So Audrina’s shitty comedy is another man’s shitty reality, but the good news is that it’s only natural for her to date a lifeless inanimate thing, even if he’s just 25% of a body, because she’s a fucking lifeless robot and I hear their conversation isn’t all that different than what you’ve seen of her on the show and here are her pics.

Everyone’s got fetishe, but I have always been against this sex doll bullshit. It’s not because I am a fucking born again, or against fucking inanimate objects, shit last week I shoved my dick in the toaster, hoping I’d feel something. Unfortunately, I had no luck and I’ve been applying polysporin to my dick all week, the burns just won’t go away and I think it’s infected. Either way, if you look at the pics of the above sex doll, the bitch looks like a dead body I saw on CSI, only bald. Anyone who fucks this shit’s got serious issue, unless they are drunk, but the dude who baths her, and changes her panties/wigs is always a little more fucked up. I wonder what his mom thinks when he brings this shit to x-mas dinner. “Hey Mom, I want you to meet my wife…” You are a creepy motherfucker, use your hand like everyone else. I am drunk.

I was inspired by my Beckham is a sex doll post, so I went on a quest to find a man and his doll in romantic love affair. This is what I came up with. I think the pictures speak for themself, dude’s in love with his doll, an unhealthy obsession but he’s got a beard and that in itself is creepy. I would say that I hope this guy is none of your dad’s but a man who loves a doll probably has very little real vagina, so little that knockin a bitch up isn’t an issue, either is STDs. If we’re lucky, this motherfucker is your teacher, or neighbor or manager at Best Buy. Because that would make this post funny.