Remember when Elisha Cuthbert was this hot thing everyone wanted a piece of, I mean maybe because I live in her hometown, I heard a lot more buzz about her than the rest of the world, but she was definitely all over the fuckin’ place, dudes were jerking off to her in that Girl Next Door movie, and she had some Maxim covers, and now she’s pretty much a dumpy lookin’ nobody. The only thing upsetting in these pictures is that she hasn’t come back home so that when I get drunk in the same bar as her I can do my best to destroy the little self esteem she has, you know make her feel like she really sucks at life for not being a big star, and making her want to prove herself to me by sitting on my face. See, I don’t care that she’s got fatter and looks like the kind of girl who doesn’t shower always, doesn’t keep her bush maintained and who may or may not have a 3 week old tampon lodged in her pussy, just because it was too much work to take it out, I’m talking Toxic Shock Syndrom pussy motherfuckers.
Here she is doin’ nothing, something she’s pretty fucking good at lately.
I just shoved my finger in an 18 year old girl’s mouth sexually and it wasn’t a hit.
I don’t know why, it was impulsive but I am sure it had to do with her perky tits being in my fucking face.
It wasn’t a random attack. I know the girl from around, she works the cash at the pharmacy down the street from me and we talk sometimes, that’s why I was so shocked when she called her manager and had me escorted out after I took things to the next level.
I hate pointing the “blame” finger, I rather stick it in a girl’s mouth/vagina/anus, but she was totally asking for it with those half-exposed fucking tits. Tits I can only imagine Uma once had when she was 18. But now she’s just a sloppy mess.
So Mischa Barton got dropped by her agent this past week because she’s a has been who hasn’t landed work since the OC. Her Publicist, who doesn’t want to lose her as a client decides they need to draw some positive attention to this bitch and calls the paparazzi and “tips” them off about where Mischa and her Boyfriend are going to be frolicking around in a bathing suit, because they feel like that genius strategy is going to work like it did in the past. They obviously don’t realize that just because bikini pictures are a tried and tested method to get some exposre, it doesn’t mean the shit is hot or anyone will care to look at them, especially when the subject of the pictures is a sloppy bodied, pothead of a celebrity that has seen more cellulite than Roseanne’s underwear in the fat years.
I feel like the lack of creativity on her publicist’s side of things in getting her some buzz and hopefully lead to some work just shows lazyness that is pretty much on par with both Mischa Barton’s body and is about as successful in execution as her barely there career and I feel violated because I know they are trying to trick all of us!
I guess the real victim in all this is her boyfriend because he probably originally thought he won the lottery when he started dating her, like that Mischa Barton is a celebrity and having her as a girlfriend will really benefit him amazingly, but instead of the lottery he got a real shitty deal and now he’s stuck, that’s why you always gotta do your research before you jump into things. I bet he struggles with the memories of pretending to love, fuck and kiss a girl who feels like a fleshy pillow and that’s enough to make a man go pretty fuckin’ gay pretty fuckin’ fast….poor fucker…
Here is Sheree Murphy, some sloppy british bitch who’s worked her way out of the working class factory life and onto TV and in the process managed to land herself a soccer player to marry and have a bunch of kids with and it’s nice to see that despite the fact that she’s destroyed physically by the pregnancy, her husband is still horny enough to get busy with her in the pool for all of us to see. You know that stems from not trying to show off his trophy wife, because she’s more of a participation ribbon they give the retard kids so they don’t feel discouraged for losing, and it is sheer horniness and something you can relate to. I just hope he’s drunk because that’s really the only way I can accept this kind of behavior, like last night when we saw some fat horny Italian chick who was built for making babies, get with some random dude in a really large shirt and pretty much stood in the corner sticking her tongue down his throat and taking breaks to whisper the names of all the babies she has planned for him. The fertility almost turned me on, but the estrogen charged thighs definitely didn’t.
Here are some pictures of Jamie Lynn Spears going to acting classes, reality is that Jamie Lynn Spears should be going to a personal trainer. Bitch is looking pretty fucking sloppy and sloppy girls aren’t good.
I remember bringing home this chick who looked alright dressed. We ordered some food and as she ate it shit dripped all over her outfit like the slob she turned out to be. It was gross, but I didn’t care, I wanted to see her tits and this was a good excuse for me to get her shirt off, that was before she actually took her shirt off and I was faced with the strongest push-up bra built, because the second it came off, this girl who I thought was tight bodied, had nipples that aimed to the floor…..I am talking tits a mother of 3 probably doesn’t even have, that just kinda hung off her like a half full bag of milk. I still let her get me off, because I have no standards, but I was thinking how gross her tits were the whole time.
Reality is that I know Jamie Lynn is a teenager, but that means she should be more tight bodied now than she will be 5 years down the road, but I guess things shift and maybe she just hasn’t lost her babyfat yet. That was my wife’s excuse for her belly for the last 30 years of her obese life…I keep telling her “bitch, it’s not fucking babyfat, it’s called you’re a disgusting pig who doesn’t stop eating fat”, but she doesn’t listen. I think it’s just a matter of time before she follows the family tradition of eating fast food and cheetos, marrying losers, having 2 kids she hates, ending up on drugs, washed up and unable to land any work all by the time she’s 20, because the younger generation a growing up a lot faster these days. The other day I walked in on two 14 year olds ripping lines while getting blowjobs in the club bathroom….
I guess she’s trying to break her destined fate, but going to see an acting coach, but I don’t think any acting coach good enough can save a Spears. She’s just riding Britney’s tailwind, which is probably something that doesn’t smell as nice as it sounds and its worked up until now and I’d be surprised if she ever gets cast in anything decent. She’s just another white trash high school drop out with a dream, like this whore I once knew who was missing half her teeth but always wanted to be a pastry chef. She took a few of the classes, maybe even finished the program, but within 2 years, bitch was back on the streets, there just wasn’t as much money or sense of achievement in making desserts as there was in making dudes bust.
Point of this post is to say, is it say, I think it’s illegal to post about girls who are under 18. I can only hope she sues me.
