I have almost been attacked by two faux hawks. It is the UFC fight in Montreal and the streets are filled with guido Ed Hardy losers who are all jacked up cuz they are going to spend the night watching half naked dudes wrestle before going out and drinking themselves straight again where they’ll gangbang strippers in their hotel rooms….
The closet case, sexually repressed tension is getting these losers fired up. The first was a guy in some Toyota, license plate CUH 4019, clearly feeling not as manly as he should, since it’s UFC and UFC is made for motorbikes and muscle cars, cuz that’s what all the closet cases overcompensating are into….He had New York plates, but his scent screamed Jersey Shore….The second dude was some asian with a faux hawk who thought he was Italian, who decided to tough guy me as he was crossing the street…..
This level of sexual tension making these dudes so fucking angry could be put to serious use at the gay bath house…..
But that doesn’t matter, what does matter is that the stepFORUM is the best place to spend time on the internet and if you join the stepFORUM, you may be lucky enough to making your childhood dream come true if meeting Rob Schneider is your childhood dream….like the motherfucker in the picture who is out there on the streets promoting us. Good times….you should get into…..and here’s a whole lot of shit going on there….
I had a rough start to the day. I don’t want to get into it – but it has to do with the police, HIV, two teenage girls and a strap on dildo covered in cake….and a lot of sedatives. The weekend is a bit of a blur and I had no computer access…..but….I’m finally on the computer now, and figured what better way than to start the week by posting links to where you’re supposed to go when I’m not online and that’s the stepFORUM, or as I like to call it…Heaven…
Here is a picture of Brodiemaxx from the DrunkenstepFORUM with Bobcat Goldthwait….
Proving that if you use the DrunkenstepFORUM good things happen and all your life dreams will come true, as long as your life dreams aren’t anything substantial and are totally attainable…like getting a picture taken with Bobcat Goldthwait…
So click on these links and maybe something this good will happen to you…because let’s face it, I’ve met a couple celebs, unfortunately, and none are as cool or as sane as Bobcat Goldthwait…even though I still don’t understand why or how he got famous…but that doesn’t matter just visit the stepFORUM….
Sometimes things just aren’t what they seem….like in theory forums are for geels, but not apparently they are also for dudes who pretend they are chicks for cock shots…I like to think ours was designed for bikini models…even if the girls I try to talk to on the shit aren’t actually girls…but I’m sure if you dig deep enough you’ll find everything you need….so Here is some action in the stepFORUM….
I started my internet career on a forum, not that this is actually a career, but I figure I can pretend it is since I have nothing else going on and it makes me feel like I am not as much of a waste of space as I actually am.
I used to go online on various communities and I’d rip the fuck into people and ask the girls for nude pictures, this was before social networking, youtube or any of that shit existed, I’m talking back in the 1990s before I realized that you could make sites of your own and lure 15 random assholes to read your bullshit…
I got sucked in because shit was addictive, I was a drunk who sat at home all day, my roomate at the time had a computer, and there were 18 year old chicks posting pics of themselves in their bikinis.
It was a totally different era, but after fucking around for a few days on our forum, I realized that some shit never changes, there are still people to laugh at talking to each other on places that aren’t twitter, facebook or wherever internet trash mingle nowadays…There is still the potential of finding internet love, sex, cybersex the old school internet way and I fully endorse the shit…
There’s also an amazing arcade where I can’t break the highscore of the losers who sit there playing it all day…
All this to say is that we shouldn’t forget where we came from and here’s some action going on in the forum.
I never know if I’ve used these header pictures before, I don’t remember a lot of things, not that you care when I come offering the most exciting shit going on in the stepFORUM, or what I like to call, the happiest place on earth….
The stepFORUM is the happiest place on earth…at least that’s the story I heard but I’ve never been to Disney and since hear that based on the stories I’ve heard from Disney execs about Miley Cyrus’ experienced blowjobs, the stepFORUM may not actually rob Disney of their marketing catch phrase, but I like to pretend it does….
Here’s a ton of action going on in the stepFORUM….
I have spent the last few days drunk in various places and it has almost been awesome, except for the fact that I have tried to convince endless tourists to invite me back to their hotel rooms to let me watch them shower together. You know a little fucking hot tub party because I feel like I’ve missed out on hot tub parties in my life and think it’s time to make up for lost time….all I need is to find some willing pussy.
On a sidenote, I woke up with an erection. I think that means I am over my impotence or depression caused by my wife’s body after spending the last decade on Precious’ diet….while I’ve spend the last decade trying Precious’ dad’s school of parenting…but only because I think fucking my stepdaughters is a right of passage before sending them off to the world to fend for themselves….and it doesn’t end with retard babies…
Speaking of retard babies, here’s some shit going on in the stepFORUM to keep you busy, while the rest of the world is on vacation. Cuddles….
Someone posted this picture of their girlfriend on Facebook – probably accidental and I just happened to be online at the right time before he took it down freaking out that he just showed the world his girlfriend’s tits. Sure she’s not hot, but it’s all about context, you see any girl who gets naked on the internet is amazing to me, no matter how many imperfections they have, you see when I go through all 1000 pictures in a girls facebook and I don’t see nudity, I see wasted opportunity and failure. Just think about how better the world would be if every single girl went topless casually and for everyone to enjoy, we could turn around and mask it as a charity thing, who knows, I just know that all girls are sluts, so they are all more than willing to take their tops off in the bedroom for men they just brought home from the bar cuz they need to get fucked, they just need to broaden their scope……..so remember the stigma of getting naked on the internet is seriously over. No one cares if you get naked online, we’re all perverts and sexual people and the internet allows you to show us all your pussy, because you want to. It is not going to get you fired or kicked out of school. If anything it’ll make you famous….
I figure the stepFORUM is a good place to start…..
I am not one to kiss and tell, actually I am, because anytime I get to get with someone who isn’t my wife, I can’t help but be amazed that someone who doesn’t have to fuck me, would fuck me, so I like to advertise that….and it turns out that the stepFORUM is a great place to get girls to send you naked pics or to get them to invite you over to have your way with either their mouths, asses or pussies. So your destiny is really in your hands and no I’m not talking about your penis, let go of that thing and get in the stepFORUM,is a good place to start planting the seed for a better tomorrow and by better tomorrow I mean a place you may find some pussy willing to bang you that only requires moderate travel.
Here’s some shit going on in the best kept secret on the Internet…
I have been working on writing my heartwarming Christmas book for kids based on my childhood in Mexico with a whore mother who died of AIDS, a wrestling priest at the orphanage I was sent to where I first did heroin with my dad who I had a loving relationship that got me pregnant and made me wonder if it was his or my boyfriends, no wait that last part was Mackenzie Philip’s story, my orphanage experience was really shot lived because a crazy religious cult leader pretty much kidnapped me and snuck me into Texas and molested me in the name of God. I am keeping my fingers crossed in hopes that it is going to get published like that Julia Child’s blogger who got a shitty movie deal out of the internet….
So I haven’t been keeping you looped in on all the amazing shit going on in the stepFORUM….So Check it Out….on stepFORUM Friday’s weekly stepFORUM round-up….
When I don’t have anything to talk about, I never revert to the Weather or the fact that Summer is officially over, I talk about pussy, cuz that other shit makes me want to shoot myself in the face, which turns out to be a good strategy to end up on Oprah, a lifelong dream of mine, because professing my love to her pretty much is the only thing I can cum thinking about without actually touching my genitals, she is a fuckin’ god.
Here is an amazing amount of shit going on in the stepFORUM, or what I like to call the closest thing to heaven on the internet….
I used to think that forums on the internet were for people who masturbate to their favorite comic book character they want to fuck, or anime cartoon they want to fuck, but it turns out they are for people who dress like their favorite comic book character they want to fuck.
That’s not to say this dude’s from the stepFORUM, but he should be and here’s a whole lot of shit going on in there, something for everyone, get on this shit….
The stepFORUM may not lead to half naked whores laying over you playing boardgames on the beach, but it may because I don’t think anyone on there has tried to make this kind of thing happen, and even if it doesn’t pan out, always remember board games are embarrassing anyway.
Here’s some action going on there, while I regroup.
We are recruiting new talent for the stepFORUM, ideally slutty young girls who don’t know better than to get naked and post it on the internet to a group of people she trusts, thinkin’ that it’ll never come out of the woodwork to haunt them later in life, but I’ve had pretty shitty luck makin’ that happen, so I’ll be pretty happy if any of you go and check the amazing stuff people have been putting up…here’s a sample….