It is Thanksgiving today and I give thanks that one day Stephanie Pratt will be the one in line on Thanksgiving for free food, because The Hills will be over and she’ll be unable to find work and will have burnt thru all her savings. She will become the kind of girl who you see on Maury who lived in her fucking car for 6 months because she’s couldn’t pay rent and refused to sell the designer clothes she accumulated during her 15 minutes of fame she had despite having no talent.
Today is Canadian Thanksgiving dinner for most Canadians, but not for me because I am broke and hate family time,, but I am planning a trip to the homeless shelter for a free meal if I’m not too lazy, but that doesn’t mean I’m not allowed to give thanks…and today, I’d like to give thanks for this video…
I was just emailed this commercial of Georgia Senator’s Saxby Chambliss giving the world a wholesome Thanksgiving Message, unfortunately it was a little too pleasant for him. If you scroll to the end, you’ll see him grabbing his grandaughter in a pretty unwholesome way. I’m sure it was accidental and not some subliminal need, because any molester in their right mind knows to keep that shit behind closed doors and not bring it out in front of camera crews. I guess “big daddy” shows his affection for his family with a pre-puberty titty grab, while other non-wholesome families just put their kids in front of the TV and not on their lap for a grabby horsey ride, I’m not going to spend much time on this since it’s a week old and probably totally out of context and probably something you’ve seen, and in his defense, he is from Georgia, where this kind of thing is encouraged. It’s a Southern thing..
I am going to admit, I didn’t put much effort into this. There are probably way better Turkey videos out there and I apologize to anyone who spent hours slaving over their Turkey video, hoping one day it would be featured on a site nobody reads.
I just figured when you assholes are all dicking around with your family, or by yourself on your day off, doing whatever bullshit you do to entertain yourself, whether it’s watching football, telling your mom how much you miss her and are so happy to be back home to suck her tit and help in the kitchen, going through old photo albums, and wondering where the good old days have gone, dealing with repressed memories of you getting touched by one of your uncles during Thanksgiving dinner many years ago, or if you’re trying to come to terms with your unresolved issues with your parents, you know feeling like you don’t measure up to your siblings, like you’re their least favorite, like they’re ashamed of you…..you might as well do it to these videos…
Not to mention, I think it’s good to know where your Turkey’s been and what it’s gone through to end up on your table, while I sit here eating pasta noodles with soya sauce I found in the back of the closet, and it pretty much tastes like shit…
Here are the videos….
The 6 Dollar Ukrainian Turkey…..
Some Weird Angry Death Metal Turkey Killer…Named Psycho Jim….
Farm Boys Don’t Just Like Fuckin’ Their Sister, They Like Burning Turkeys To Death….
Psycho Jim Does it Again Only With Restraints…
The Butcher…..Music Provided By DJ AM….
Good Ol’ Country Folk, Claude Ouellette & Albert Rozas The Turkey Killers With a Sense of Humor Edition….
A Couple French Men, An Axe and an Obscure Film Artist Lookin Motherfucker
Some Wierd Interpretive Student Film Turkey Slaughter
