I don’t know much about Brazilian tranny sex with closet case football players who only play the game cuz they love the locker room before and after the game and the only way to not get beat the fuck up is to be really good at your position, if you know what I mean….but I do know that it looks a hell of a lot like dude’s training for his lifeguard license or doing a CPR course or some shit, cuz this “PDA” looks more like “CPR” and the whole this is boring and almost unbelievable. I think this is just a continuation of the whole “Gisele is actually a woman” publicity stunt…but what it comes down to is who fuckin cares….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Gisele and Tom Brady got married in Costa Rica and here they are on their way to the pharmacy to buy some topical creams and some prescription pills to stop the emotional pain the day after. Apparently when they went to consummate their relationship for the first time after the ceremony, because she’s a good little Catholic girl who would just use her mouth up until they marriage,Tom Brady freaked the fuck out when he discovered that she didn’t have a penis.

He hasn’t spent the last 15 years of his life hanging in showers, jerking off to dudes, to marry someone with a vagina. I guess based on her face, it’s one of those false advertising situations and he’s got every right to be pissed off….