I haven’t been keeping track of pretty much anything the last couple of weeks, because I don’t really care. I read Lohan and Ronson are broken up, I read Ronson is getting a restraining order because Lohan is crazy and on drugs, and I did a google search to see if Lohan has died yet, because she hasn’t called to wish me a happy birthday and that’s so unlike her, you know since she’s never called to wish me a happy birhthay, or called me for anything for that matter.

I ended up coming across this video, that 300,000 people have seen, so I am not really quick on the shit, but apparently Lohan got on stage with Lily Allen at her concert and if you can stomach seeing this fat broken uterus in offensively tight shorts, you’ll see Lohan get on stage and sing along with Lily Allen awkwardly, probably because she knows that Lily Allen is good friends with Sam Ronson, and Lohan’s done gone nuts.

Why did I just write all this?! I really couldn’t tell you.

I was watching 20/20 or whatever news show they premiered this video on Friday, because I was out of town for Canadian Thanksgiving Turkey dinner at my wife’s aunt’s house and they have TV. So besides getting wasted on wine, making fun of their kid for being a homo when he was dancing around like a girl, getting in a fight with on of their friends who was some angry dude from the Islands about Hockey, because I don’t watch sports and sports seem to be the only thing he does besides stripclubs, talking to the grandpa about lesbian shows at strip clubs and whether they actually lick the pussy or pretend to lick the pussy and learning about the reason tranny prostitutes exist, which is because of a loophole in the law that makes it legal, where paying a girl for blowjobs is illegal, I took the time to watch Britney and all her personalities, naked and in various states of crazy for her new song, that is better played on mute. Here’s that video for those who weren’t as lucky as me to see it when it first dropped Friday Night.

On a side note, I think she looks a lot better than any tranny prostitute I’ve seen, even if fucking her for money is illegal…Kevin Federline.