WHITNEY HOUSTON is dead….the day before the grammy’s…..shocking….I am pretty sure she died years ago….but I guess deatht only counts when you’re heart stops beating…the cause of death is unkown…but I”m gonna say it had something to do with being a tormented addict…so whether her heart went out, or she finally killed herself, it is safe to say it wasn’t natural causes or complications from plastic surgery, or car accident, or murder…I’m already over it. Would have been more fun if this was an RIP Lohan or really anyone but Whitney post….

The other day I asked for a natural disaster or global tragedy or celebrity death because I am a sick person and the powers that be kinda pulled through today with the news of Whitney Houston’s death…why take a crackhead from us….

I can’t say I didn’t see this corpse of a woman and her tormented soul’s end coming the last decade…if anything she is a medical miracle who needs to be studied to learn how massive million dollar addiction took so long to knock her down…

And you know 48 is young to die…but at least she made her mark, made her music and left her legacy….something all the crackheads I know who died premature didn’t have the chance to do….

I am only sad cuz I love me some crackhead pussy….I will miss laughing at her crackhead behavior and trying to masturbate to her sweaty crackhead body and even cry to her Angelic song that is now actual angelic song when reflecting on all the lost love in y life… but the truth is we were out with the old on this bitch for a while now…this is no MJ death…she was ready to die and really trying to die for a long fucking time…the real tragedy in all this is that I didn’t get to fuck her like I was Bobby Brown…

Here is her last performance….2 Days Ago….

I have no sympathy for drug addicts…I just know it really gives us perspective how fragile a life is when you throw a million dollar drug addiction at it for the last decade…it also really gives perspective on how Kevin Costner has been a horrible bodyguard…..

Now we need to listen to all the memorial shit….but I think this homie does it best….

BONUS – if you want to see the last dick she had before dying fuck Kim Kardashian…. FOLLOW THIS LINK

As a journalist, I will keep on top of this story…digging for truths and all exclusives interviews and updates with hotel staff…friends…..keep checking in…

UPDATE: 10:15 – She’s still dead….

UPDATE: 10:29 – Still dead….

Update 10:39 – thinking about all the people who didn’t have a 10 year multi-million dollar drug addiction the last decade who died today….you know the mothers, fathers, kids with cancer, grandmothers, respectable people in the community….who didn’t spend 10-15 years killing themselves….

UPDATE: 10:41 – Just watched this performance at the beginning of her career….1986 Grammy’s…before she killed herself….

Update: 10:42 – Just googled Whitney Houston Fat

Updatee 10:46 – Looking for nudes….not necessarily of Whitney….but just found out she was a model as a kid………

Update 10:50 – Just watched this….and laughed…

Update 10:51 – Whitney Houston remains dead…and I think her ghost just knocked on my window….fuck…I hope I’m not gonna be haunted for life like she was…..

Update 10:53 – I’m totally over this Whitney Death….

Update 10:54 – I need to go get drunk and high like I was Whitney…cuz all this drunk and high talk is making me hungry to get drunk and high….from one addict to another….

Update 10:34 am (12 hours of not caring in)- She drowned to death probably because of prescription pills like Xanax…something I already assumed…because prescription pills is America’s epidemic.

RIP Motherfucker.

Here is an inspirational post for all your nobody’s out there…remember that no matter how insignificant you may be…and no matter how hard you tried to be a big deal in your life, career, hometown only to have it not really pan out as you wanted it to….you’ll be okay….as long as you’ve got a good set of tits….You’ll get by…..and there will always be a bald awkward looking dude willing to “personal train you”….cuz other strategies of getting pussy didn’t work for him so he had to re-work his career and become a personal trainer so that girls talk to him….and if all works out fall in love with him……cuz he gets to know them so well and they trust him with their bodies…and even if they don’t fall for him…he gets great vantage points of their pussy in a variety of positions….that he can jerk off to….and yes I tured a post of a hot enough bitch in tight clothes into a post on her bald personal trainer….

So while you pick up the broken pieces of your life….here’s AJ Michalka, some failed Disney star at the gym in tight clothes picking up her life….

Here are some Valentines Day inspired pictures of Jennifer Nicole Lee in some lingerie to remind you that if you’re alone thie High Love Holiday season…cuz you are unlucky with women…don’t beat yourself up over it…don’t commit suicide…cuz cry about how lonely you are…cuz just around the corner is a tranny who will fuck you up the ass….or even free….cuz tranny’s are way less picky….like you they just seek acceptance for being different…and when you scrape away all the girl hair…and girl make-up….you got yourself a dude who you can relate to on a dude level….without all the girl bullshit…

Now most of you don’t know who Jennifer Nicole Lee is…and that’s probably a good thiing….but if you’re wondering she’s some fitness bitch who is always topless or in thong’s in bikinis in Miami cuz like all trannies she seeks attention…glamour and fame….

Here are those pics….

VMAN made a calendar featuring 12 Victoria’s Secret angels in some 50s style jackets, wearing some 50s style vintage lingerie, rocking some prety intense cleavage and ending out my horribly hungover day just a little better but still horrible than it normally would be….it’s simple, get these girls out of Victoria’s Secret airbrushed nippless and vagina lipless campaigns and into some better concept stuff that may not be as half naked but that is less fucking repetitive than their played out – tried – tested and bullshit evil corporation marketing tool robots act that brought them fame and fortunes……

Calendars may be stupid, dated, and only used by elderly and mechanics but here are the pics….even though THESE PICS OF KURKOVA IN A THONG BIKINI ARE BETTER ….

Here’s the news….to get inpsired by….

Some Kid Wins a Contest but the Prize it at Risk of Being Revoked because it is Being Considered a Gange Sign

Woman Says Breast Implants Saved Her Life
Brazilian-born model Sheyla Hershey credits her breast implants for acting as airbags when she craned her car while driving drunk in Texas.

Teacher Accused of Sex With Student
Police have charged 27 year-old Ashley Jean Campbell with sexual abuse of a minor after they say the former teacher had sex with a 16 year-old male student.

Random Acid Attack Leaves Mom Nearly Blind
A horrifying acid attack has left a single mother of two from Northfield Township nearly blind. Meanwhile, her attacker is still on the loose.

Random Acid Attack Leaves Mom Nearly Blind
A horrifying acid attack has left a single mother of two from Northfield Township nearly blind. Meanwhile, her attacker is still on the loose.

Oh shit….old bitches from movies who I’ve never found hot are in bathing suits for a movie they are filming…and for some reason I’m posting it…probably cuz I am addicted to posting celebrity bikini pics…all while I know if I want to see hot half naked bikini hotness I just need to use the internet…Maybe I’m doing to for Sean Penn…you know to give him something to jerk off to while visiting the site…cuz I know we don’t need to look at 40 and 50 year olds in bathing suits and react like it is a good thing….we aren’t coaching an geriatric aquarobic class….staring at this shit isn’t our job…we are free to find actual hot girls in bikinis and that’s what I’m going to do….starting with Facebook vacation albums…#anxiously-awaiting-spring-break-bikini-influx-on-FB….

Word.

Here’s a 27 year old model I have never heard about because despite wanting to fuck models….or at least have them sit on my face…I’m no expert on models…but her name is Morgane Dubled, she’s a big model who used to work for the Devils at Victoria’s Secret before being poached by higher end lingerie companies, she’s from France, french girls have anal on the first date….

Tis the fucking season….

Happy Valentines Day….the holiday used to take attention away from what is important…Black History Month.

Here’s hot Jewish party slut turned model turned celebrity fucker turned cokehead Bar Refaeli posting pics of her legs on twitter as she lays in bed getting liquored up….cuz you can take the party slut out of the party and pay her millions to get half naked so that she can rejoin the party on a more exclusive level….but you can’t take the slut out of the slut…..She’s almost posed the way I like them….except with less restraints, dazed medicated looks on her face, and black eyes.. I’m just joking. Or am I? Who cares. The internet made me this monster.

I hate on Reese Witherspoon for one reason and one reason only…..she’s the fucking devil and I need to bring her down…everyone thinks she’s this great mother, wholesome housewife who was cheated on and forced to remarry….when I know she’s a fucking movie star…and all movie stars…despite how many pictures of them you see going to church on Sundays…are vapid, spoiled, rude, disgusting, money grubbing whores….trash that if they actually cared wouldn’t be practicing lines in the mirror…but would instead be helping save AIDS babies for an organization or some shit….

Here are her shitty legs….to remind you that despite all her working out…she’s still disgusting.

DOWN WITH WITHERSPOON….

I don’t know if anyone even knows who Taryn Manning is anymore….she’s barely a celebrity…she’s barely in movies…and the movies she seems to be in are shit you have never heard of like this “The Perfect Age of Rock and Roll”….where she showed some nipple…

I only know about Taryn Manning because I am Facebook friends with her, or I was….before SHE GOT MAD AT ME AND CALLED ME A CREEP …

I guess you’d be bitter too if you were ugly and had shitty tits you were exposing to pay the rent cuz no one cares about you…..

Here’s some THROWBACK BIKINI PICS THAT WERE STAGED ….if you care…

Basic logic tells me that everything is better when in a bikini….it gets more youtube views…it draws more attention to yourself…it is the basis of Victoria’s Secret, SI and every low level celebrity with hired paparazzi strategy…..and now the bikini has gone ice fishing…and as much as I love bikinis and write about all things bikini…I’m kinda more into actual vagina…exposed and flapping in the fucking wind with icecicles hanging off the shit….like a homeless man’s nicotine and snot stained beard as he begs for changed on the coldest day of the year…but I guess this is good enough effort…

The Rose McGowan red panty flash pictures have been circulating the last day, so I figured I’d post the video becuase I really have nothing else going on…I’m still drunk from last night so it seems like a great idea…you know some good old school jerking off to a runway show for heart disease red dress bullshit…..My favorite bitch is the Susan Boyle looking bitch….the other bitches were……….

Aisha Tyler, Chaka Khan, Cindi Leive, Christie Brinkley, Debbie Phelps, Elisabeth Rohm, Giselle Blondet, Gloria Estefan, Idina Menzel, Jeannette Torres-Alvarez, Jenna Elfman, Jennifer Nettles, LaLa Anthony, Linda Evans, Minka Kelly, Patti Stanger, Rebecca Romijn and Rose McGowan.

Who cares….AIDS is more my charity…cuz I like it dripping off my face…

I’m glad I’m not a feco-philiac or into scat because last nights drinking and my hard living…..coupled with my diet made for some really horrible early morning bathroom experiences that I’d hate to be faced with if eating my own shit was my thing…you know like being served a steak the size no single human should ever eat….but the guy who loves steak just can’t refuse…You get what I’m saying….and that is that I want to go back to my dream of being a pair of a hot girl’s panties for the day…hoping modern science gets us to that point in technology in my lifetime….

Stop looking at me.

I love Kate Moss…and even if she’s not showing her TITS or PUSSY or ripping lines of cocaine…or even in sex tapes with needle sharing groupie fucking with out condoms rockstars….I still pay attention…like in this topless photoshoot with her great ass in jeans…definitely not built like the 45 year olds I know…but in my defense, the 45 year old women I know are all addicted to crack and look like they are in their 70s….near death…they aren’t rich classy designer drug users like this Kate Moss little miss fancy pants….

Here are the pics….

Coco may be a fat…tranny looking…fake model who is actually a hooker/stripper that Ice T pulled out of the gutter and made his exclusive….but she does bring entertainment, even if it is cheap, repetitive and boring entertainment to the internet with her ridiculous tit and ass implants….

She’s BEEN TOPLESS ON TWITTER BEFORE …..not now she’s putting up topless pics of her babysitting her nephew topless, and people are making a big deal…sure, it would be considered sexual abuse, or maybe even kiddie porn, if instead of a topless whore it was a dude with an erection….but it just a topless whore, so we should lighten up a little….topless is natural even when the topless features stupidly sized fake tits….I can only assume that we’re just jealous the only tit we got from our babysitters growing up were on elderly nuns trying to see what they missed out on by selling themselves to god for free…..well speak for yourself…all nipple pics are good nipple pics…

She also put up these pics of showing off her nipple rings in a see through shirt…

I have no idea when any of these are from…and really it doesn’t matter….