I don’t know what the fuck happened to my site, but I keep getting an “Internal Server Error”. I called the hosting company and they can’t help me, so I guess this is the end of Stepfather as we know it. I thought I was going to have a big break like the emo 20 year old homo I saw on 20/20 last night who got a show on fox because of a shitty video he made called Myspace the Movie that got big on youtube back when it was easy to be the top YouTube video.
If any of you have good deals on Videocameras, email me. I may have a sponsor to get stepTV to take over the world.
Until then, here’s some links….
Roberto Cavalli Fashion Show Pics with Hot Bitches GO
Amateur Porn of People Fucking in their Hotel Room GO
Saddam Hussein was Executed - His Video is On the Internet GO
Some Saddam Hussein Pre-Execution Video I’ll Never Post the Actually Death, Cuz This site does sex not death… GO
Some Quebec Slut in a Bikini Cuz Quebec Sluts are Sluts…True Story GO
New Amateur Girl Named Sweet Adri from Nebraska GO
Stock Up on Rockey Merchandise Cuz He May Be Washed Up, but I heard his Movie was good…. GO
Lohan Strips for Strippers Because She Called Them Cunts a Few Months Ago and Realizes that if her addiction takes over, she may be one of them or something GO
Do you like sex and can’t land pussy? But this, 3 for the price of 1 is a good deal for pussy. Why pay for sex, when you can pay for a spray that will get you sex from real girls…. GO
The concept is pretty simple. I leave random messages on Paris Hilton’s voice mail in attempts to confuse her. That’s pretty much all I’ve got to say about that, except maybe to tell your friends to watch it too…Two days until 2007 and I am fucking excited to leave 2006 behind me. I’ve heard of people saying they’ve had bad years, now I understand it. Lucky for you, you’ve been along for the daily updated ride and I am still broke, not famous, impotent and boring. It would be unrealistic to think that everything is going to change in the 2007, but I am pretty sure it will. Stay tuned motherfuckers…
Paris Hilton and her soon to be released sex tape Kim Kardashian the Monkey Lover because She’s Fat are rocking out in Australia for New Years. Everyone has a fucking sex tape and I love it. Anyone under the age of 22 has been raised on hardcore porn and come from broken homes at least that’s the way I see it when I hear stories about 12 year old girls going to clubs in their highschool uniforms, ripping lines in the bathroom, dancing on the bar showing the world their ass then ending up at the after party where they suck some random dude’s dick. Or when I hear about highschool threesomes where girls are sitting on each other’s faces for some 15 year old jerking off in the corner, or when I hear that Anal sex is more popular to the younger generation because they can’t get pregnant. I guess this is the shit that movie Thirteen was based on and I love every fucking second of it. When I was 16 my girlfriend wouldn’t even take it up the ass after 3 years of being together and she was born pre-mature with subtle retardation…now asshole virginity is not a sacred thing. I may not be able to benefit from it, but at least I get to watch the videos. It’s a Christmas fucking miracle.
I went out to a bar last night to drink my happiness about this finding away and got drunk enough to text message Stavros asking him what he was doing for NYE.
He wrote me this
I’m in Australia dude, can’t believe I’m here. What are you up to?
I figure he had no idea who I was so I asked him to sponsor my website and asked if Paris was there since they are engaged. He never answered and it broke my heart. I can only assume my number is now blocked and dead to him, l like his immune system since Paris gave him AIDS.
Here are the Paris pics.
Here’s your bonus picture - it’s Paris and the Armenian Kim Jungle Fever Doing the Charlie’s Angel pose because they are fucking lame. You probably don’t find it lame because you and your friends do this pose all the time because you are a generic piece of shit and that’s why I hate you. Cuddles.
One of my readers thinks I suck because I am not funny anymore because I complain instead of ripping into celebrities….
Matthew Sobel
yo faggot
you sold out
drunkenstepfather
huh?
Matthew Sobel
your site used to be good
now is as played as you
drunkenstepfather
who are you?
Matthew Sobel
im your conscience
drunkenstepfather
what are you wearing?
Matthew Sobel
you know your site sucks
ha typical plebian drunkenstepfather response
drunkenstepfather
what is it missing
Matthew Sobel
what are u wearing?
thats what u come up with
u got lohans number and u used it to leave some nonsense
ur linked into all the pop blogs and shit and ppl come to ur site and leave noone cares
u coulda been somebody, but now ur shot, old hat, yesterdays news pal
drunkenstepfather
they never cared
drunkenstepfather
they never cared
Matthew Sobel
ur on some pathetic shit, that like ur rap
its not working, be insulting
*thats
and stop linking to ugly fat women and little girls its creepy and ur gunna end up on a pedo watch list
you should post this on ur site and show ppl how i completely ruined you
drunkenstepfather
i feel so ruined
I guess I am a pussy. Speaking of pussy here are the Jessica Simpson Cameltoe pics….
I don’t really know what the fuck is going on in these pics. My guess is as good as yours and I am not going to make a stupid joke about how she’s got a new fetish or how this is her little brother they keep in the basement who only gets to go out around Christmas time and brass poles is a Christmas Tradition at the Hilton’s just like watching Paris get slammed by Greek guys is an Easter tradition, because Greeks are Orthodox and Easter is huge for them. A little known fact about Paris Hilton’s career is that her dad was behind the sex tape, I’m not talking behind the concept but behind the camera, at least that’s the story I heard.
Speaking of brass poles, I added a strippers to my AIM after I convinced her to give me her contact while getting a lap dance. I asked her what she did on christmas, she said that she worked. It’s the best night at the strip club because the guys who go there are the core strip club fans. They are lonely, horny and willing to splurge on a Christmas present for themselves to try to make themselves happy. This usually means offering the stripper they took 10 lapdances from some extra money for sex back at their place. Either way, Christmas is a time for miracles, and this stripper on my AIM got her own kind of miracle when her title went for dancer to hooker, but it’s Christmas so I guess it doesn’t count, she just see herself as a charity worker…
I am watching an Oprah rerun because I have nothing better to do and I only get one channel. It’s kind of a reoccurring theme in my life. Janet Jackson is on and she calls her mother “Mother”. I find that really creepy, like Norman Bates creepy and it could have something to do with why people said MJ like to touch little boys, but we all know he’s innocent. Either way, I am on vacation, I refuse to put more energy into my post than this. It’s called being lazy.
Someone I know told me I need to go on Prozac, it will make me happy, but I am concerned that if it makes me calm/sane/etc, I’ll abandon all of you and I’d hate for that to happen. I’d rather just self-medicate with alcohol so in planning my New Year’s Eve resolution, I’m thinking of putting “Drink More” on the list. I am also thinking of starting smoking again since I quit last year and 2006 was shitty. I guess that’s the opposite of what most people set as resolutions, but at least I know that I can follow-through on mine with little to no effort.
That’s the story I heard and here are my steplinks…
When Idiot Americans Travel, They always cause a scene. This dude takes a Roman Bath… GO
This is a PartyHardcore Compilation and it’s NSFW GO
Some Christina Model Sets on Photobucket. I have no Idea who she is or if these sets are worth your time but if you’re the virgin I think you are, then you’ll love them. GO
Here are some Christmas pics of Pam Anderson showing her panties to the world, with a glass of champagne, which is pretty weak considering we’ve all seen her goods violated by Tommy Lee. I don’t know if these are recent pics or not, I’m pretty out of the loop and I guess so are you, considering you’re reading this site….
I guess since I have a commitment to you unappreciative virgins, I should tell you about my Boxing Day…Nothing really eventful happen, I had a 20 dollar bill in my pocket that I was planning on spending on my Christmas shopping because I like a deal and I actually thought about giving the family gifts this year even though they hate me. I went to a lingerie store in hopes of finding a couple of cheap g-strings for the stepdaughters, I like to keep them nice and slutty in the event they ever meet a rich guy who can sponsor me. That left me with 14 dollars that I took to the Casino in hopes of making a million dollars, I figured it’s never too late for a christmas miracle and I was annoyed of the crowds, despite being poor and needing to shop for a deal, all these other fuckers were just cheap and I find bargain hunting pretty fucking tacky. Either way, I lost all the money at the Casino, but got some old lady in a purple jump suit to give me a lift home all I had to do was stand by her for 2 hours because she was convinced I was her good luck charm.
Speaking of old ladies, here’s them there Pam Anderson Pics…I am not sure what the hell is holding her umberella but with a suit that color he must be Hindu.
I am still on vacation and it seems that Jessica Biel is too. My Vacation consists of me sitting on my ass in my shitty one bedroom apartment, her vacation is a little more intense and luxurious. Lucky for you she wore a white bikini and with white bikinis come full vaginal definition.
I am pretty sure I’ve seen these pictures before, I recognize her stupid tennis game, but I’ll post them because everyone else is and it’s still Christmas to me. I don’t really have much more to say about this because I am on vacation and my vacation isn’t that much different from my everyday life so go fuck yourself if you’re complaining, I can’t tell, because we have a pretty one-sided relationship. I did liveblog my Christmas but haven’t decided if I should bother posting it. I realize that few people read what I write. RIP Gerald Ford.
I am not sure what’s going on in these pics, all I know is that santa has no pants on and she’s rockin out in a Mrs Claus outfit. I was going to say that I only know what you know, but realized that you are all idiots and probably don’t know anything.
I don’t have time to post today, because my wife has put me on a mission to shoplift. She assumes that if there are as many people as the TV says there is in the malls, that I’ll have no problem ripping off the stores. The TV is her link to the outside world. I am not actually going to rob any stores, cuz my wife isn’t hot enough to go to jail for, and because I know they hire tons of extra security, but I will be taking advantage of this escape opportunity to watch hot girls trying on tight clothes. That means I won’t be back til later and this is just a little something to yuletide you over. That was a lame holiday joke that you won’t find funny. Either way, I hope you Jews had a Merry X-Mas and I’ll think about posting my X-Mas day live-blog for you later.
It’s Christmas, I am not Working Today, But I made this for you and it’s a fucking Christmas Miracle. Enjoy and have a lovely day with your loved ones or alone or doing whatever it is that you do. Cuddles.
It’s Christmas weekend and I need to get my Holiday shopping done. I am planning on hitting up the Salvation Army with my 10 dollar budget for the family and it’s going to be a Christmas Miracle. The next 2 days I would be drinking egg nog, but can’t afford it, I’d be eating holiday treats but I can’t afford it. I’d be bringing holiday cheer to my neighbors because money isn’t everything but I am too lazy. Either way, it’s going to be a poor person’s Christmas, but I’ve seen It’s a Wonderful Life and according to Jimmy Stewart, there’s no such thing as a poor person’s Christmas. Be safe, have fun, and if you’re alone, go to the strip club. They’ll take care of you.
Some Dude Throwing Snow in Innocent People’s Faces GO
Today’s Christmas Miracle has probably been floating around the internet for quite some time now, but I am only getting to it now, because that’s pretty much how things work here. I lure you in with old pictures and seduce you with my life-changing stories…Either way, this is Lucy Pinder and her boobs, I mean friends. She’s some UK Slag and she’s dressed for the Holiday. Since this is my last post before Christmas, I figured I’d milk the shit out of slutty girls in Christmas gear…
Speaking of milking shit, I went window shopping in the Jewish part of town yesterday because one of my homeless friends told me it’s amazing to see these women shop for their cruises, resorts or whatever southern vacation they are going on. After 8 hours of window shopping next to the changing rooms in a bathing suit store I was asked to leave by security, but before they escorted me out, they confiscated my stepCAMERA and no matter what I said, I wasn’t getting it back, they kept telling me that videotaping girls trying on Bikinis is illegal and that I would get charged for something illegal. I wasn’t willing to be in jail on Christmas, Again.
My initial reaction was to blame the Jews you know a first they killed Jesus, now they’ve killed my digicam kinda thing but I realized that I was in their hood and that was just the easy way out.
Speaking of easy, here’s them there Lucy Pinder and her friends pics…
I call Paris and leave random messages. The original concept was to pretend I was calling lovers or girlfriends or whatever so that Paris felt awkward when she answered, but I decided to leave a homo message to her fiance Stavros the Greek heir…I pretended to be his lover and it’s funny. If you are wondering what the washed out words were - it’s “Impreganting you with my seed” and “We are Greek and our people were raised on anal sex”….Either way, I am a fuckin star. Fuck You. Christmas in 2 days…Bring your dancing shoes. Homo.Cuddles.
Here are some pictures that were sent in yesterday by one of my readers. I assume he is the one who took the pics because they are shitty cellphone quality, but then I remembered that my readers are useless virgins who don’t really leave the house, unless it’s to go buy new computer parts or videogames….with the occasional stop off at McDonald’s for a Milkshake. Rumor has it that they bring all the boys to the yard…
Speaking of boys in the yard, I went down to my mailbox yesterday afternoon to see if anyone sent me any Christmas cards that would bring me Christmas Cheer in this time of Christmas Miracles, and there were none, but there was a Christmas Miracle that came in the form of a check for 27 dollars addressed to me. I am not sure where it came from, I can only assume it was from one of the porn companies I linked but I did know that it was going to fund my Stepfather Christmas party, even though I don’t have a company, just a shitty website that only I work for….The reason I decided to have a Christmas party was to celebrate the victory of this site while getting wasted, but my 27 dollar budget wasn’t going to take me as far as other Christmas parties do, like sipping vintage whiskey with my boss while he’s getting a blowjob from the hot new sales rep. So I bought 2 cheap bottles of wine for drinks, a box of donuts for food and a cheap cigar for entertainment. I sat on a park bench in the cold alone, passed out half way through the second bottle and woke up to find 2 homeless guys drinking my wine and eating my donuts…I tried to get them to sing Christmas Carols with me, but they were too insane to understand what I was saying, so I went home to my wife who stank like shit. It may not have been as glamorous as it could have been but it was a fucking Christmas Miracle nevertheless and I can only hope it gets better from here…
These are some pics of Alley Bagget, a Playboy model posing for Christmas in some Fuzzy Lingerie….to bring the Holiday Spirit to you and yours…
My Necro Post got linked up on a couple sites and got back to Necro, because he’s one of those accessible rappers, who probably doesn’t actually make money off his shitty music…It turns out that he’s not into being criticized this is what he wrote:
I AINT A FAT DUDE AND MY MUSIC DOESNT GET OLD FAST
GET OF RID THAT SHIT AND WE CAN TALK ABOUT AN INTERVIEW
REMEMBER I PUNCHED THAT KID IN THE FACE IN THE FRONT ROW
TALK ABOUT THAT
Anyone who reads this site knows that that Necro Post was weak. I wasn’t trying to hurt anyone’s feelings or make anyone emotionally eat more than they already do. He writes lyrics about how hard and how sadistic he is but dude can’t take some fat mexican dude with a shitty website calling him fat. I guess it’s really not hard to pretend you’re a crazed sex and porn deviant or whatever he actually raps about because I haven’t heard any of his music in 5 years. So I wrote this to him:
i am not trying to start beef, i am probably the biggest push you’ve got in a while. 25,000 people saw that shitty video. I wasn’t at your show, and your music gets old after I hear the same song for 7 years, but no beef…although that’s what you’re probably hoping for…fatty.
let’s get that interview
with love
jesus martinez
drunkenstepfather.com
And He Wrote…
WHY R U LISTENING TO THE SAME SONG FOR 7 YEARS??
I DROPPED 3 NEW ALBUMS ON MY LABEL IN 2005
5 NEW ALBUMS IN 2004
WHAT THE FUCK R U TALKING ABOUT?
Tough guy who writes in CAPS and sings about rape, murder, anal in fishnets, pussylips and being addicted to his dick is really. I figured having the ability to write line after line of smut that make no sense but rhymes would give him a sense of humor. When Herschel realizes that sucking on fat chicks in Montreal doesn’t make you “hard” or “vulgar” or “sadistic”, luring insecure girls on stage, who like to fuck anyone, isn’t a talent, DJs at the local bar have been doing the same thing for years, even the dude at my videostore gets pussy cuz he doesn’t charge bitches a late fee…
Since the new me is positive and optimistic, I would like to give Necro the love he deserves for being in the game for such a long time and still performing, I’d like to also that he has a great way with words, and rhymes a lot better than I ever could.
