Yesterday I got in a street fight with one of those college cunts that stand around trying to get you to sign some worthless petition for animal rights, greenpeace, whatever. They usually come in pairs, work 5 hours for $2/hr, which means they have to be trust-fund fuckers from Connecticut who just didn’t feel like the office internship daddy setup. Instead, they decided to work on their tan while boosting their resume with “humanitarian” bullshit, and use that hard earned 10 dollars for a cab back to their parents’ city penthouse getaway.

I was on my way to the bank to cash my hooker-relapse check, when this blonde petition bitch says something about “Do you want to help Gay Rights?” I ignore her because i got places to go. Behind my back petition bitch mutters “Fine, Ignore me.” I went into fuck you mode.

I told her “That’s your job, to be ignored. I support gay rights by not voting for Republicans. I don’t have time to sign your useless petition because i got rent to pay. And that comment behind my back was pretty fucking tactless.” I stormed away and petition bitch was stunned. Pussies like her never expect people to fight back.

I was still angry and called my guy friend who works down the street and vented about that little twat. An hour later, he calls me back and said he dragged petition bitch behind a dumpster and raped her. I don’t like rape jokes, but I liked that one.

Here is Samantha Fox being blonde like that petition bitch. This Brit is an old playmate from 1993, who got her ‘modeling’ career started at 16 in 1983 when her mom sent pictures she took of Samantha posing in lingerie on her bed to some newspaper. Classy (at least my mom didn’t introduce me to my pimp). She had some sort of music career with a hit called “Touch Me, I want your Body.” Now go touch yourself because you want her body the way it was back then so you can ram each and every opening with your virgin prick.

Obediently yours,
Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

EMAIL ME HERE