Pamela Bach is the Reason for Hasselhoff’s Drinking of the Day
You may not know who Pamela Bach is, but she is the reason David Hasselhoff turned to the bottle. Everyone thought that it was because he was David Hasselhoff and the only way he was able to live with himself and his joke of a career was to spend his earnings drinking , but instead it was because of whatever hostage crisis this bitch put him through when she married him to be part of his prestigious life and by prestigious I mean second rate TV show celebrity. I am not sure what is more amazing, the fact that girls are so easily impressed by a dude after a life of disappointment that all you need to do is get on a shitty TV show to get in their pants because they think you are famous enough to let in their vagina and impregnate them, because the last guy who they let do that worked as a trucker in their home town and was a good customer at the dinner they worked at, or the fact that David Hasselhoff was able to convince a girl to marry him despite being an embarrassment to both his family and anyone who ever crossed paths with him. Unfortunately for the Hoff, he jumped at the first vagina that came his way and had no idea that she was more primate than human on that evolutionary chart leading to alcoholism just to fall asleep at night and now alcoholism to just deal with the aftermath of the marriage. I’m sure we’ve all been there and banged girls we shouldn’t have just because they offered and we knew better than to say no because we didn’t know the next time it would happen again and the good news for Hasselhoff is that we now have a little more sympathy for that fucker.
