I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

17

Apr

Fergie Broke My Ears on Regis and Kelly of the Day

I am hooked on posting morning TV clips of the day, I think it’s because I don’t have a TV and I am jonesing, but it’s also because pictures bore the fuck out of me. At least with videos, I can watch what a mess people make of themselves while trying to sing or while doing interviews and that’s a lot less interesting than just imagining their it my head while looking at a picture because in my imagination it always leads to a hardcore porno scene, but watching it play out on video is usually a lot less work for my hungover brain.

It’s kinda like when you were forced to jerk off to pics that took 4 minutes to load on the computer back in 1996, when you first got your internet and where you’d be up all hours of the night talking to 18 year old SxxyGrrl69 from New Mexico while jerking off to porn pics you found on SublimeDirectory just sitting there waiting 5 minutes for the good part of the picture with a little pussy getting fucked so that you could set the scene as it took forever to load so you could drop your load to the elaborate story you imagined…then one day discovering you can watch the sex clips instead.

Either way, here’s Fergie singing like an angel this morning and she sounds like she’s been up all night on a coke binge while singing some kind of Disney Cinderella bullshit in some kind of sleep deprived, drug induced hallucination and it brought sunshine to this glorious day but not as much sunshine as Regis brought when he pretty much apologized for the horrible noise when they came back from commercial before Kelly told him it was a Fergie sng. That’s the kind of honesty that makes Live TV funny…because even Regis knows Fergie sucks.

Bonus – Here’s Her Interview That I Didn’t Watch Because If She’s Not Naked, I’m Not Listening..

Posted in:Fergie|Painful

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