I don’t know what the fuck Christina Ricci is on, but it reminds me of the days I used to go to dirty raves because some asshole told me that girls on E were horny and it became a bit of a regular thing for me because I had no where else to go at 4 am when wasted. What they didn’t tell me was that these girls who were high on E looked like they were stars in some kind of horror movie and were too busy fidgeting, dancing, sweating and wearing disgustingly ratty clown clothes that I couldn’t take them seriously. I did manage to fuck a few raver chicks after promising to buy them candy despite how dirty I knew it would be because of the 12 hours of dancing in fur put their vaginas through but I am the kind of drunk guy who couldn’t turn down any pussy, especially not in the 90s before I was married because vagina at that time was a hot commodity. It always ended in disaster because they were usually totally fuckin’ insane and I’d manage to try to get the most sex out of them as possible, meaning I’d have to see them outside of the Rave setting and I remember seeing them in their weird raver clothes in broad daylight embarrassed me for doing what I had done….you know the whole purple fat pants with pacifiers around their necks and stuffed toys in hand, like they were fuckin’ 7 years old and it kinda freaked me out and made me hate myself more that I already did.

After I was done with them, I would ignore them and pretend I never met them because it was that raver shit just didn’t fly with me but after years of reflection, I realized that I didn’t disrespect them for being dirty sluts high on drugs but the truth was is that I couldn’t respect them because they had sex with me and that meant they had no standards or self esteem cuz I’d never have sex with anything that looks like me and it made it impossible for us to be friends despite having had shared that magical happy hardcore filled night together.

Either way, thanks Christina Ricci and your crackhead face for bringing back those great fuckin’ memories, you bitch.

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