Lindsay Lohan’s looking good at the premiere of Cloverfield last night, and by good I mean like a 1987 Texan socialite from oil money at the horse races or some shit. Her big hair reminds me someone who is trying to look like some 70s Farrah Fawcett bullshit but it looks more like this Vegas show girl I met in the early 90s who would walk around all done up in sequined dresses offering us blowjobs for 20 dollars which was nice because at least we knew she put out.

The good news is that her tight body distracts me from her stupid hair and I wouldn’t mind giving her 20 dollars for a blowjob, I think she’s worth it.