I was just in the process of fighting with my wife for the last 3 hours. I don’t really know what it was all about but it did involve me telling her to get her fat ass outside to go on a fucking walk because she is going to die and despite that making all of our lives more peaceful, we’d rather have her around because we are self-destructive like that. See I am not always mean.

Here are some pics of Vanessa Hudgens floating around the internet that you have probably already seen. Someone told me she is 17 in them and that makes this shit illegal to post. I figure if I get sued maybe it will get me famous and despite trying to only post pictures of 18 and older girls the line is so grey that you just never know.

Everyone likes having a good time and here she is stickin’ her tongue out with her friends, it’s on the same level as doing booty dances with her friend or simulating sucking a dick with their friends. It standard shit, it’s not a big deal and you shouldn’t be making a big deal out of it.

I was in a bar last night drinking til 6 am because that’s what life is all about, you assholes who are asleep at 1 to be fresh for work the next day are really missing out. There were two college kids making out so fucking hardcore that it was pretty much dry fucking…At first I thought it was 2 chicks because kids these days are kinda looking like one gender. The dudes are skinny, wear spandex and have long hair and the girls are dress like dudes .I checked it out from a couple of angles because I wanted to see what was going on and that’s when I realized it was a dude and that’s when dude realized I was watching them a little too closely. but his chicks ass was fully exposed and I wasn’t going anywhere and that’s pretty much the same reason I am posting these pictures….

Bonus - Vanessa Hudgens Leaving the Gym to Get into Porn Shape

It’s nice to see that Britney Spears is working really hard on her comeback by taking time off and suntanning on a yacht because we all need our downtime sometimes. I guess her month in rehab and her 2 years prior to the whole rehab thing where she got married and did nothing with her life wasn’t enough fucking downtime for her. It makes me jealous that I am here slaving away at this site a couple hours a day, going out all night, waking up mid afternoon, going out the park for hours at a time to get away from the computer while people like Britney live the lazy life….

Either way it looks like Britney is wearing some kind of G-String, unfortunately for you I don’t have pictures of that, even though it may be a scarier thing to look at than it sounds. Like the other day, I was sending myspace messages to a model who told me that her vagina looks like a hamster because she hasn’t shaved in a while and as cute as I think hamsters are and as much as I think bush is cool in theory, I know if I ever saw it, I’d have a whole different reaction….but since I have no standards I’d still take one for the team…I’d just have second thoughts before doing it, even if just for a second….

This is what Elisha Cuthbert looks like when she waddles the fuck out of the tanning salon. I used to have a thing for a girl who didn’t put much effort into getting ready. Maybe it’s because my dating experience before my wife consisted of girls who made their money off looking worthy of a $40 fuck. I know that that isn’t as high class as some of the girls you’ve thought about calling, but I know that if I am paying $40 for anything from a chick, she better have lipstick on, especially when she hasn’t showered in 3 days.

Anyway, what I liked about my wife when we first met was that she was low maintenance, she’d throw on a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt and be ready for the day. What I didn’t realize about this whole low maintenance shit is that she would let herself go, stink and gain 175 lbs in 4 years. So now I am back into the girls that try to dress all pretty, have eating disorders and care what people think of them, because it’s less traumatic on my sex drive.

I guess what I am getting at is that Elisha is one of those low maintenance chicks you’d think wouldn’t be stressful to be with, but reality is when you get home, she gets all sprawled out on the couch eating dorritos ruining all chances of a future movie career except for maybe playing the mother in What’s Eating Gilbert Grape 2.