On the surface Bar Rafaeli is a good looking, bikini ready and bikini wearing model with a pretty hot body, but that’s all white wash because under this pink bikini lives a Jew. I love how everyone thinks I am an anti-semite because I say that Jewish girls aren’t hot 99% of the fucking time. Even Jewish guys I know agree with me and their own mother’s are Jewish so I don’t really get what the big deal is.

Speaking of Jews, a Jewish friend of mine, yeah I know, no Jew is a friend to anyone, told me today that he just got out of the Hospital for mennigitis, which is a pretty serious thing to come out of the hospital for. I went on to tell him that he didn’t get that shit from drinking out of puddles or sleeping with dirty girls, but because it’s God’s wrath for being a Jew. He didn’t find it funny and went on to call me an anti-semite too. You just can’t win with these people, one minute they are trying to rip you off and the next are crying about the holocaust, get over it people, if it wasn’t for the Holocaust, Israeli Bar Rafaeli wouldn’t exist so you can thank Hitler for these titties…

I don’t know when these Bar Rafaeli lingerie pictures were taken, but I figured they were worth posting because she’s Israeli and she proves that some Jewish girls are actually decent looking and not the product of inbreeding with their droopy dog faces that only daddy’s big bank account can fix with plastic surgery.

I am not trying to be an anti-semite or anything, I am just saying that Jewish guys always run after non-Jewish girls for a reason. At first I thought it was a power trip, like having the power to lock a hot non-Jew down and making her convert for you and your lifestyle, because I hear converting to that shit takes at least a year, but then I realized that Jewish girls just don’t really have it going on for the most part. Sure they are all good at giving blowjobs because of their teenage years at summer camp trained them right, and usually the Jews who are good looking are just smoke and mirrors, you know the right clothes and make-up and constant maintenance and hair salon appointments. But they are just as high maintenance as their Jew hair and Jewish guys realize that if they just run after some poor non-Jew that they don’t respect, they can get what they want because they give them a taste of the “Good Life” all while being dicks to them, because in their mind they are never going to marry the bitch because she’s not one of them, until they prove that they are worthy.

The whole thing is weirder that David Copperfields elaborate pick up strategy and I guess none of that really matters, because they are getting the bitches and you aren’t, but these pictures of Bar Rafaeli prove that their is still hope for the Jews…..

Since I have been drinking pretty heavily (expensive) lately, my lunch break consists of walking around for 30 minutes and maybe stealing ketchup packets from a Deli. Yesterday I decided to bum a smoke off some suit outside Starbucks, and was enjoying the buzz when this borderline-obese dogwalker yells at me, “Disgusting!” Now I am rarely called disgusting in broad daylight (and mostly only the internet). Well, yeah I find smoking disgusting too, but I actually quit a year ago and I just felt like a drag today. So I said, “Excuse me?” And this old fat chick with 12 dogs says, “Your shirt, it’s disgusting.” I look down, and i was wearing my “Mary is my homegirl” virgin shirt. “What?” I say. Fat dogwalker goes, “No respect, you kids…” or something.

And that’s when I got pissed and said, “We have freedom of speech in this country, and I have the right to wear anything that celebrates my Catholicism,” which was total bullshit. I bought the shirt in 2003 and now realized it was douchey but hadn’t done laundry and I wasn’t about to let some old bitch point out my shirt was retarded, whatever her reasoning.

That’s when fat dogwalker starts apologizing over and over, saying she was sorry, then goes on for 5 minutes about Jesus (not the beloved drunkenStepfather) while her 12 dogs are pissing everywhere, and she won’t let me get away. I finally lost it and said, “Sorry, i have to go, I am late for my abortion.”

That dogwalker would never have harassed Bar Rafaeli, mostly because she is a rich model and wouldn’t wear stupid ratty shirts, and she is Israeli and everyone knows Israelis can kick the shit out of you (they are like all commandos, seriously). She dated Leonardo DeCaprio and looks exactly like Giselle, which makes sense. Here she is wearing shorts and a teet-friendly tank in NYC yesterday. It’s your party now.

Obediently yours,

Sugar Nell (ex-hooker, friend of Jesus)

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