I don’t like that Rumer Willis is making sex faces at me. It reminds me of all those times I’ve been forced to have sex with disgusting girls because they were just too into getting fucked and I had no capacity to say no.

Rumer Willis is one ugly girl. I don’t care how blue she makes her eyes, shit won’t distract me from the fact that Demi Moore was on hard drugs while she was pregnant and has invested a lot of money in paying off People Magazine to name her top 100 Beautiful People and producers to cast her in their shitty straight to DVD movies about an ex-playmate becoming a sorority girl……

I guess what it comes down to is how much she’s paying this Luke Perry Mother Fucker to put his arm around her, I figure he’s either a co-star in the movie or someone who is willing to put their dignity aside for a little exposure, but either way the thought of anyone fuckin’ her kinda confuses me and makes for something I’d definitely watch, because I’ve done worse, but definitely wouldn’t enjoy watching. It’d be like a 2 Girls 1 Cup situation, but less sexy.

On a side note, Ashton Kutcher still has mommy issues and an old lady fetish and is still having sex with Demi Moore because he can’t figure out how to escape her controlling weathered hand and plastic surgeried grasp…..and he is supporting his stepdaughter by going to her event because I guess they are proud that she hasn’t killed herself yet, something they’ve all been expecting her to do since the first time she saw a mirror. I like to support my stepdaughter differnently, like by walking in on her when she takes a shower to tell her she has hot tits I want to suck to boost her self-esteem.

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There’s nothing wrong with people like Demi Moore who can’t deal with getting older, they just keep on holding onto their drowning youth as long as they fuckin’ can. It happens all the time in all walks for life with both men and women, so I guess it’s not that big of a deal that she’s hoping that no one notices that she isn’t that desirable young slut who Bruce Willis was making really fuckin’ ugly babies inside anymore, so she goes after the 25 year old boy toys, she gets 500,000 dollars of plastic surgery and now she brings out copies of her Vanity Fair cover from 1990 when she was naked, pregnant and more relevant in the world. A time before we knew her uterus was a fuckin’ wreck and made mutant babies, at least that’s the Rumer….

Seeing her sign her old Vanity Fair cover reminds me of the football quarterback in high school who is fat, divorced and living in a 1 bedroom apartment, lifting boxes in the warehouse now, but still brings his high school yearbook out to the bar to brag to the kids about his glory days when all the bitches wanted his dick….but now all he’s got is internet porn and hookers to love….

I once randomly met a dude who decided to open up to me about how he fell in love with a girl in a picture. I am not talking about you perverts who print up these celebrity pics and scrap book them to cum on at a later date when your mom’s out of town on business, I am talking about a girl who was on a picture at a bed and breakfast he was staying at in the South of France, I guess he’s a romantic like that and I joked about whether his picture went to the beach and got topless with him and if they had sex while having a picnic eating baguette and cheese while drinking cheap bottles of when and he wasn’t laughing, he was lookin’ traumatized.

He went on to tell me that day after day he would see this picture of a beautiful girl and he would obsess over it, like lying in bed at night thinking about who the mystery girl was. By the fourth night he cracked, and snuck down and got the picture and jerked off to it, because he was in love and wanted to consummate their relationship. The next day he had decided to ask the woman who owned the bed and breakfast who the girl in the picture was and she said it was her daughter when she was 20, the summer before she died in a car accident 10 years earlier.

I feel like that jerking off to dead people, is kinda the same feeling you’d get having sex with Demi Moore. Here are her bikini pictures.

Here are some pictures of Demi Moore running into her hotel in a see through shirt. We’ve all seen her tits in that Stripper movie of hers so I am surprised it’s taken her this long to expose the fake fuckers again. I don’t think nipples are a big deal and I don’t understand why I am considered porn for openly posting nipples, but Americans are pretty fucking conservative, and thanks to Demi Moore I am considered a Smut Peddler….

I was talking to some dude in the US Army this weekend while wasted on the campsite about banging older ladies. He told me that whenever he goes out drinking he tries to find the places where cougars hang out. He just likes the way they fuck better. He was going on about how young girls get all attached to his shit and one night stands with them take a bit of work and getting them to leave the hotel he happens to be at that day is always awkward. They get hooked to him and want to spend the day with him, where as MILFs just want to get the fuck out and back to their husband and kids or if they are divorced want to avoid any emotional involvement because their hearts have already been broken once and now they just want to cum…

I never really had that mentality, I always thought that old chicks were kinda gross, but I guess finding someone to make my bed for me and act like my mom would have been a good thing, but since my wife never gets out of bed, there’s no real need for that.

Either way, here are her nipples until the paparazzi companies email me demanding I take them down. So take it all in motherfucker…cuz this shit’s porno according to google.