Here’s one of the dancing with the stars dancers in her bikini and despite dancing all fucking day every fucking day it seems like the good life may have taken the fuck over for her. She looks like she’s been eating all the fancy cheeses and burgers and fries her money can buy, like when she was the fat chick in high school no one wanted to take to the prom, before turning to dance with a bunch of other rejects looking for friends, only to end up on TV instead of the stripclub where she would have belonged if she gained weight in the right places…you know less on the hip and more on the motherfuckin’ tits….
Cheryl Burke looks like the kind of girl who went to prom alone, or who skipped out on prom all together because she was too busy being the fat girl eating a bag of Oreos and Ice Cream with no friends and no date. You know, before she found dance, and the community that encouraged her to go bigger and try harder becuase it finally felt like she had friends and people who cared about her, she felt like she belonged and that new confidence came her whole eagerness to take her shit to Hollywood and make millions doing what she is most passionate about and what saved her from suicide, instead of being a drug addicted stripper, but these pictures make it safe to say she hasn’t fully recovered from the scars left from Highschool…..
I have a feeling that Cheryl Burke's wearing these tight fucking pants because she doesn't realize that she's gained a solid 20 lbs, or she realizes and doesn't want to admit it. I've been there, I feel her pain, the day I realized they didn't sell pants in my size at regular stores was a pretty depressing thing, so I'd do all I could to squeeze into a pair of skin tight pants. I'd put them on wet like a slut in the 80s, I'd wear them as low as I had to to get around, I'd tie them around my waist undone with a rope or electrical cord. It was misterable until I just stuck to elastic waistbands....something I think Cheryl Burke's taking advantage of in these pictures just because her ego doesn't want to size the fuck up...either way, some of you black dudes out there love fat bitches, so I figured it was worth posting and if anything, maybe it'll motivate this pig to get dancing again....
Here’s some dog faced Dancing with the Stars dancer who was destined to be a stripper giving lap dances saving up for new tits, but something went wrong in the plan and made her rich and famous on TV instead but at least she hasn’t lost touch with where she’s supposed to be right now, you know showing off her tits, what her destiny had planned for her to be doing, before getting all ambitious and going against the natural path paved for her, and I guess we should celebrate it, despite how shitty her tits are, because there’s nothing worse than a whore not embracing the very things that make her a whore by pretending to be above her whore behavior, making Cheryl Burke one to look out for and here are her nipples.
Yes. That joke is old and tired. Like me. Get it, I’m making reference to her tits because she’s holding actual pumpkins where her tits are. This is next level comedy, motherfuckers should start referring to me as Dane Cook with this caliber of shit. I am ashamed of myself and I’m going to go drink the pain away, because I don’t drink to forget, I drink to remember to drink more. If that makes any fucking sense…..cuz I know it don’t make dollars.
I don’t even know who Cheryl Burke is…..I am bad at this game.
I always had this idea that dancers were these lean, borderline anorexic lookin’ chicks in tights, before actually going to a local dance school’s dance performance because my stepdaughter gave me a free ticket. I figured getting down to watching teenage girls dancing and not getting naked in the process would be a nice change of pace from what I was used to. I was wrong. Every single girl who came out with her hip hop choreographed Britney Spears backup dancer shit was built like a fucking tank and seeing hot chicks in booty shorts shaking their asses wasn’t really an option, because there were no hot chicks, just these thick, strong Hayden Panettiere chicks squating, popping and locking in some kind of seizure inducing dance battle.
The point is that Cheryl Burke is also a dancer, but not the good kind you want to give 10 dollars a song to, and a thick kind you want to hire to help you move because she’s more fit than any of your deadbeat friends, and here she is in a bikini, showing off her thick dance muscles.
This is some Dancing With The Stars chick who isn’t on the show anymore, but that doesn’t stop her from showing off her dance moves. I think she calls this one the Vagina in Panties Dancing Out of Cars Shuffle or some shit. She’s not hot, she’s not relevant and all she’s doing is showing off her panties and that makes me jealous. I wish life was as easy for me, I’d have no problem flashing a little skin, or my underwear to land jobs and make money for it, instead when I flash a little skin, I make people throw-up.
Speaking of throwing up, I was walking around aimlessly last night and saw a real live pussy in the flesh that didn’t belong to my wife, and it was fucking remarkable. This drunk girl was squatting outside the club she obviously drank too much at, and was puking everywhere as her friends held her hair. I stopped to point and laugh about it and when I looked the girl over, her pussy was glaring back up at me. I am convinced the fuckin’ thing winked at me. Too bad for you, I don’t own a camera.
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