Everyone loves Natalie Portman and here she is getting pissed on. It’s like some virgin loser trying to mark her as his territory because he’s obsessed with her and doesn’t want other virgin losers getting too close, only in this case, it’s just a dog who doesn’t give a fuck about her and figures that her ratty ass coat smells like something that deserves to be pissed on. I guess this is funnier than seeing a bitch get shit on by a bird, but it’s not as funny as seeing me piss on Natalie Portman. The truth is that despite being willing to piss on this bitch, I don’t really give a fuck about this bitch, she bores me and when everyone talks about how hot she is it makes me question my sexuality a little, even though I’d be willing to piss on any bitch.

Like this past weekend, I was hanging with some really sleazy guy, who has orgies with his buddies and fucks any pussy that comes his way and dude would freak out even over the most average bitch. I am talking girls who look like moms with big mom asses or teenage girls who hadn’t hit puberty yet. He was on the prowl and every single girl who walked by was a fuckin’ b-girl or worse. Every time a hot girl would walk by and I’d tell him that that’s the kind of pussy he should be staking out, her would say something about how they only want money and designer clothes and are snobby bitches. So I spent the day watching him cat call chicks who looked like dogs and it made me go home thinking there was something wrong with me, because when I get my creep on, I try to make sure it’s for someone worth creeping on where he was just into anything with a pussy, that’s when my fat wife waddled into the room and I realized that I guess I shouldn’t judge him, considering I really have no fuckin’ standards, even though I pretend I do when I am out in public…..

Here’s Natalie Portman getting pissed on…..