John McCain doesn’t like Gays marrying, probably because he’s 80 and a republican and gays didn’t exist in the 20s and still don’t exist to republicans. The only reason I am posting this is because Ellen comes at John McCain with some emotional drivel about how she thinks she’s isolated and it hurts her feelings that she couldn’t get gay married up until recently and as the leader of the lesbian movement, should probably consider coming at him with some tangible logical arguments other than how it makes her feel like the last one picked for the lesbian softball game and I am disappointed.

Either way, I agree that everyone deserves the right to legally bind their love even if it’s homo, But I do know that these gays have know idea what they are getting themselves into. Marriage isn’t all the media makes it out to be, it’s something that people think they have to do it after college otherwise they aren’t real women and guys agree because of love, lack of anything better to do and to avoid arguments and enter phase one of being good little members of middle-management society.

What I do know is that after having been married, I think it’s safe to say that I wish this shit was illegal for straight people too.

Heidi Klum was on Ellen today and they decided to get to the kitchen, I guess now that they’ve made it, they are going back to their womanly duties and headin’ back to their home in the kitchen to make the food for the family….well at least Heidi is, Ellen is too busy adjusting the prosthetic penis in her pants while tying a tie and shaving her mustache while reading the paper….

Either way, they are making meatballs and the obvious ball jokes came up about balls because let’s face it, when you’re making meatballs, what else is there to joke about. I am all for obvious jokes, they are always the easiest to come up with and the only jokes I know and whenever I drop them everyone gives me dirty looks, but that’s usually because I am pissing myself at the same time. It’s part of the act.

Either way, Heidi asks Ellen if she’s ever had balls, and Ellen says it’s been a while because she’s a lesbian….get it? I think Heidi was probably referring to in her pants, because that bitch is more masculine than you. It looks like Ellen just busted nut all over her lesbian pant suit like a 14 year old boy with his first playboy…

I make a point of not watching Ellen, maybe because I don’t own a TV, but also because she’s fucking annoying and I hate lesbians. I only have patience for them when they are dyking out in front of me and don’t look like Ellen.

Either way, Christina Aguilera made an appearance on her show and her tits are exploding out of her dress and you can tell that Ellen’s got a total soft on for those tits. She’s acting even more awkward as she normally does trying to lure that new mom pussy into her dressing room….if it doesn’t work out, at least she has this footage to run one out to and so do you….

I like new mother’s and their new tits and that’s part of the reason I am banned by numerous coffee shops in my area, because it turns out that during afternoons when real people are at work, bitches on maternity leave meet their other new mother friends, because some obnoxious BFF’s like doing everything together especially when it means having babies together so that not only can they enjoy this new stage of life together but they can raise their babies to be BFF’s and grow up to have a lifelong lasting friendship just like them. Either way, they shoot the shit about being new mothers and how raw their nipples are and how their sex lives have suffered or are better or how they are planning on losing the pregnancy weight or how much cuter or more advanced their baby is because they are competitive whores all while breast feeding….and I get to watch.

It’s my daytime porno and it’s free, just like these clips of X-Tina.