I have a friend who used to fuck armpits, he was obsessed with pit fucking, it was more than just his fetish, the motherfucker just would never shut up about the shit, it would get really annoying, it’s like he loved the smell of the armpit, the stubble, and if he found a girl built like this, with a pussy in her armpit, we probably wouldn’t have made fun of him and call him weird as much as we did, in fact he probably would still be alive today, cuz he would have never killed himself for thinking he was so weird for only being able to get off to armpit.

If you’re wondering what happened to Elsa Pataky, the Spanish chick from Snakes on a Plane, because it was such a revolutionary movie that you watched over and over again because you have nothing else to do with your time, it turns out she was fucking Adrien Brody’s nose, probably in hopes of it leading to better roles than Snake on a Plane, but they’ve broke up and now she’s walking around on set in a one-piece, which may not be naked, but is better than nothing which is probably the same rationale she had when she took that role in Snakes on a Plane, cuz I guess shit may have been better than nothing….

Pics via Fame

You know when you see a hot fucking young piece of ass walking down the street with some old ugly motherfucker and you don’t understand what the hell they are doing with them until you see them both get into a convertible Porsche and drive off with smiles on their faces and the wind in their hair, then it all makes sense….The hot slut is a gold digging whore and can see past the dudes obvious deformities by convincing herself that they are charming or cute because they fuckin’ deformity comes with a platinum card.

Elsa Pataky is the pretty much the same story only instead of a convertible, dude’s got an academy award and instead of being old and ugly, dude looks a fuckin’ cartoon sketch you get drawn of you at the fair. I guess that academy award comes with a whole lot more perks than just Porsche, like star treatment internationally, or maybe vacation houses everywhere and lots of down time to fuck and that’s a pretty good trade off for this hot pussy.

So if you’re tired of being a piece of shit loser no one gives a fuck about, you should just go out there an win an academy award and all the pussy will just fall in your lap without anywork despite your ridiculously small penis.