Hilary Clinton is out having a beer with the locals in Puerto Rico and she does a little dance and shit makes the news like she’s doing something a Presidential candidate shouldn’t do. It’s like all you conservative motherfuckers don’t want the face of your country kickin’ back and having a beer and a good time because they are supposed to be serious commanders in chief and not a scene from a bad wedding video where the groom’s mother drinks too much because she’s sad to see her little baby have a new woman in his life because it means he won’t need her anymore and for the last 25 years of her life her little baby needed her are became a core of her existence and now a lonely future lies ahead of her as she acts as the second woman in command forcing her to deal with the whole aging process, lack of purpose and the obvious impending death because her job is now done. I guess it’s kind of appropriate, because as Clinton holds onto this race as hard as she can, she’s not going to win and her job is pretty much done because it seems like the only person who wants to see tits in charge is me, but that’s just because I am a pervert and I like being able to jerk off to the person who calls the shot, it’s a whole authority fetish and George Bush just doesn’t have hot enough tits for me. If I had my way, only hot party sluts would be allowed to run for office because that way elections could be based on who wins the wet t-shirt contest and that would probably good in bringing the country together, since most of us appreciate a hot wet t-shirt contest. Let’s hope that’s the route Clinton takes as she scrambles to pull this failed venture off.

I would question what kind of country I live in when the people who are running for office spend most of their time promoting themselves, fishing for as many votes as possible, by making appearances on late night TV shows trying to be funny and trying to connect to the people, because I guess even they think that Americans are just a bunch of idiots who sit in front of a computer or TV and who can only connect with people who make them laugh or who they consider celebrities because they see them on TV. The presidential candiates are on some “celebrity” shit and are dumbing themselves down to be the next Paris Hilton, with hopefully a better inter-racial sex tape for the democratic party to have something interesting to offer than this whole end the war bullshit.

I guess the answer is the kind of country with major poverty, a shitty economy, a huge percentage of uneducated people, a huge obesity problem and who bomb countries wrongfully like some kind of cowboy lookin’ for some Indians to shoot up with no care for consequence or remorse for killing millions of people and spending enough money that could have been spent to find the cure to cancer or HIV which they probably don’t want to do because disease makes money. The kind of country that made The Hills the number one rated show on TV, that made Kim Kardashian famous and the kind of country who would vote Kermit the Frog or Britney Spears into office if they were candidates because you like the way they sing and still wouldn’t be able to name the 50 states, bordering countries or even who they voted into office, because college is about flashing your tits at Spring Break parties in Cancun and not about learning….

I find this shit offensive. Obama Does Colbert Report

And John Edwards Does Colbert Report

I am going to admit that I don’t know anything about American politics, what I do know is that the American economy has gone to shit, that the Iraq war has killed a lot of people, has cost a lot of money and has been spun in a way to make it look like a warranted war, when in reality the story doesn’t really add up to me and reminds me of the time I caught my girlfriend at the time cheating on me. She’d always have these outrageous stories like Weapons of Mass destruction and I kinda just believed her before landing a serious case of the Clap, which is when the evidence was so clear to me that I had to dump her, despite how hot her tits were or how good she was at riding my dick.

I will say that I don’t think a woman or a black man will get elected because the country is filled with racists and traditional misogynists who would rather keep their women in the kitchen than running their country which is probably the same reason why women weren’t allowed to be fighter pilots because of their periods about 10 or 15 years ago.

What I do know is that Hilary Clinton is double fisting her drinks like a college girl about to get naked for Girls Gone Wild and if that’s not fuckin’ sexy then I don’t know what is. Maybe I am biased becaust the truth is that I can only land drunk chicks, so this is like the prelude to me getting laid, but at the same time I like how she’s not scared to down a fuckin’ shot of Whiskey.

I guess the whole election is a little more real than it has been in the past, you got bitches drinking, old republicans talking about going to strip clubs and cheating on their wives and I don’t know shit about Obamam but can assume he’s done his fair share of seedy shit, but that’s just because I have preconceived notions of black people loving to have a good time. It’s not my fault, I’m not racist. I blame hip hop.