Mila Jovovich is playing with fire by wearing these shorts because she just had a kid recently and she’s at serious risk for her flappy beat up new mom vagina lip to fall out of those shorts…but unfortunately for us that didn’t happen, but what did happen is that she gave us a glimpse of the Russian mail order bride we all fell in love with 10 years ago….not that I was ever that much of a fan because I always thought she looked like a little boy…but a lot of other people were and that’s what matters.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Nudity for art has got me laid at least once, sure the art was the art of prostitution, but it counts. I don’t pull the whole “come to my photography studio, I have a vision for you” bullshit, I don’t pull the whole “I’m a starving artist pervert who looks homeless because my art means more to me than getting a real job and I happen to sketch naked bitches to pay the little rent in the apartment I pretty much squat in”, but I do pull the whole “you like suckin dick? Do you think you’re good at it? Your missing teeth although disgusting on my dick, probably feel amazing, maybe as good as a masterpiece theater performance, here’s 5 dollars you crack addicted whore, now show me your god given talent that you’ve refined over the years, that’s right, it is like fuckin’ poetry to me, as I watch that cold sore throb so close to my dick head, it brings up so many emotions, I feel like I’ve been to hell and back, and I pretty much have”……

Here are some pics of some fashion magazine peddling smut, only instead of embracing the fact that they are porn and their models are whores, they’ve sold million dollar advertisers to pay the whores who model in their covert porn magazine, and today’s whore is new mother Mila Jovovich…..showing off some nubby breast feeding nipples and bush and the whole thing almost gave me a boner….except for the whole mom part…..

I thought Mila Jovovich fell off the radar because she was heavily pregnant and probably had her kid and was raising the shit, I didn’t think she was off getting a sex change. I mean not that she looks that much like a man in these pictures, but she looks like she’s been in a held hostage in communist Russia for war crimes and they’ve re-programmed her to be some killing machine, like one of her stupid movies, but maybe she’s just not the hot model everyone loved in the 90s, and I guess that’s what happens when you get old and decide to start avoiding the sun, because you’re a mother now and skin cancer is irresponsible parenting…. I don’t know what i am talking about, but I know it must be good, and I’d totally be my friend, if I didn’t hate myself, especially after wriitng garbage like this post…..

I get lots of hate for making fun of pregnancy and saying things like it ruins perfectly alright vaginas and perfectly alright bodies and that’s why mothers really love their kids as much as they because they know they sacrificed any sex appeal they once had for this little fucker and their future consists of wiping snot off faces and dealing with whiney little brats crying because they didn’t get the video game console that all their friends got and all the other bullshit that comes with kids like making dinner for them and picking them up after soccer practice…

Either way, there was a time that Mila Jovovich was a decent import, I never loved her because she didn’t have tits and looked like a little Russian gymnast boy, but I know a lot of other people did. Well it turns out that her uterus now hangs over her belt like she was me only I’ve got bigger tits.